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I am 24/7 caregiver for my husband which has Alzheimer's, I am in need of a 2nd hip surgery.
1st hip pinning surgery, Failed do to over doing it while I was recovering and therefore my broken hip didn't heal.
I'm now scheduled for a second surgery, " partial hip replacement". With the same recovery schedule as the 1st surgery.
So unless I find back up to take my place for a few weeks while I'm recovering to help my husband with cleaning the house, maybe cook a meal or 2 for us, but most of all be a companion for my husband (Jamie).....
And possibly take him to appt. Or shopping.
Jamie needs no help with hygiene or dressing or getting up and going to bed he's quite independent still in these areas.


I am 59 years old and quite healthy otherwise, other than this hip situation which causes me a tremendous amount of chronic pain, and this too can be healed as long as I take care of myself and pay attention to my recovery rehabilitation therapy and home exercises I could be back on my feet in no time at all.
I have no problem doing the work to recover successfully, But I need to focus on me in order to do that.

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Unless you get a younger, trusted relative to come and stay with you, you will need to engage an in-home caregiving agency. They will provide as many properly qualified aids as needed. Not sure exactly where you live but the hourly rate will be at least $20 p/hr depending on their training level and labor shortage issues. An agency does the background checks, provides subs and takes care of all the employment/labor law issues that you'd be needing to do if you attempted to hire people on your own and then tried to manage it all while in the midst of recovery, pain, rehab, etc.

Or, do you have the option of having him go to an adult day care center during the day? Sometimes churches have adult day care programs that are low-cost or free.

Please contact your local area's Agency on Aging as they are a wealth of information on resources for your situation. You may need to contact social services, but your husband would probably have to financially qualify for services.

Also, I strongly recommend that you have a very trusted person come to administer your prescription pain meds, as many people just like yourself have inadvertently become addicted because it's so easy. I mean this sincerely. My sweet little old MIL became addicted before our eyes after back surgery. It took us a while to figure it out since she didn't fit our "profile" of an addict and it caused a lot of problems for her and us.

I hope you can get what you need and have a full recovery!
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https://www.agingcare.com/questions/how-do-you-get-outside-help-when-my-husband-with-alzheimers-refuses-to-do-anything-with-anyone-462205.htm

In this post you say you are getting money for respite care. How were you able to get that?

As said, call your County Office of Aging to see if they can help.
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You most likely will not find a volunteer for this.

You can get meals on wheels for food, you can hire someone to come in during his most needy hours and you can hire a housekeeper to come in weekly, biweekly, whatever you need. I think it would be cheaper to find a facility and pay them for 2 months respite.

You can stock your freezer with homemade frozen meals, that would ensure that you are able to eat with minimal effort.

Do you have a church family? This is where you can ask for free help. Most are willing to step in for a short time of need and many hands lesson the load.

Ask your doctor about in home services, for both of you. It would require a prescription for you and him separately, because aides do not provide services for anyone but their patient.

Best of luck with your surgery and findings respite care for your husband.
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Do check with your insurance to see if they might provide (although you might need help with unpackaging...heavier with dry ice) home delivered frozen meals. I have a friend who is getting those due to husbands hospitalization from Mom's Meals and she says they are quite good.
Check in with your local Area Agency on Aging or Alzheimer's Assn...they often know of respite programs. or other resources.
Meals on Wheels, yes probably available but sadly in our area they are not appetizing and you need good nutritious food to help heal.
It's SO hard for us to look out for our own well being and yet it is essential if we are going to survive and be able to continue caregiving. Split the needs apart...Use other home delivery and grocery delivery services, a driver for your husband who can also be a companion for the duration.
How about if it is medical appts for the recovery period that you link up with a home visiting MD? In our area both competing medical systems offer that. Perhaps the social worker at the hospital you'll be at has some ideas?
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If you have an extra room in your home you could advertise for a companion. These arrangements trade rent for companionship, and can be short term. Depending on the needs you each have a bit of money can be tossed in too, but free rent is quite valuable.
Best of luck to you both.
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What state are you in?
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A few questions for you.
Is your husband a Veteran? If so the VA can help with providing some caregivers.
Would your husband be eligible for Hospice? If so Medicare will cover some Respite.
You can private pay for Respite. And if you like many places that have Memory Care also have rehab on the same property it might be possible that you could be with him. Or if you choose to rehab at home you can hire caregivers that can come in.
Your local Agency on Aging might also help. They may have resources that might provide help.

It might help if you indicate where you live.
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Check with memory care units for respite resources. Your husband may need to be tested for COVID before he can be accepted.

You can also check with home health agencies for caregivers to rotate coming to care for him, but I would lean in the direction of a memory care unit respite.
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