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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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My 90-year-old mom has been experiencing shortness of breath upon exertion. She hasn't called her doc yet to discuss this symptom. I've called her several times just today to remind her to call but all I get is. "Whenever I get around to it."
UPDATE: She called me this morning because she was having problems breathing (instead of calling 911). I ended up calling 911 for her. She's has been admitted to the hospital for congestive heart failure and possible other issues. We've been trying to deal with her early stages of Dementia, but she won't accept that there's anything wrong with her. Her Doc spoke with me at the hospital (I do have her medical POA). He stated that she shouldn't be living alone and this may be the chance to get her the help she needs. Unfortunately, we had to wait for an emergency to have an opportunity to possibly place her due to her being unaware of her having Dementia. She's going to be hospitalized for the next few days for treatments and tests. We shall see what happens to ultimately make a decision if she goes home (with having a full time caretaker)or to a memory care unit.
You need to get her to her PCP. This is not age related. If she hasn't been for a while, labs will be ordered. It could be a number of things. Heart comes to mind.
If her cognitive abilities are intact and you believe that's her genuine response, it's none of your business.
However, if you think she would normally be concerned, then step in and call the doctor yourself. She may not be getting enough oxygen to think clearly and can't really do it herself.
On the grounds that, being short of breath on exertion, she's unlikely ever to feel like getting round to a troublesome conversation with a doctor's office and the palaver of explaining everything, I would offer to call the doctor for her. Ideally, do this in her home with her there to give consent and to answer any questions that you can't.
For what its worth, true shortness of breath (SOB) is a horrible feeling like suffocating. Were mom truly experiencing a SOB emergency, she'd be on the horn SO FAST your head would spin off, even calling 911 for immediate relief.
If her oxygen level were THAT low, she'd be pretty much incoherent.
I have had SOB issues my whole life stemming from asthma and it's one thing that cannot be ignored, considering our very life depends on taking x number of breaths each minute/hour/day. When a person counts each one, panic sets in in short order.
Leave her alone to make her own adult phone call if and when the situation warrants doing so.
Do you live local to her? Are you her PoA? If you have to call her several times a day just to remind her, the issue may not be stubbornness but short-term memory loss, or feeling overwhelmed, or intimidated from her hearing issues (assuming she doesn't have or wear hearing aids).
You could consider calling 911 and sending them to her home, explaining why you aren't there and that she might refuse help. If no one is her PoA and she doesn't have a diagnosis of cognitive/memory issues in her medical records, then they can't make her go to the ER or receive treatment. After this it may be time to call in APS to report her as a vulnerable adult.
Your answer to the questions will guide what advice is give to you, so please give more info.
If you have access to her Patient Portal you could message the doctor. BUT do not expect a reply. This is just information that the medical staff would appreciate and will probably discuss with mom at her next appointment. If mom is able to care for herself then back off. 1 call to mom to ask if she called the doctors office is sufficient. (did you like it when she called you several times a day to ask you the same question? I bet not) If she does not have one next time you are out pick up a pulse oximeter. Inexpensive and a good device to have on hand (no pun intended)
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
She might even have been afraid to see a doctor, go to the hospital; fearing that from there you might place her in MC.
However, if you think she would normally be concerned, then step in and call the doctor yourself. She may not be getting enough oxygen to think clearly and can't really do it herself.
Is that practicable?
If her oxygen level were THAT low, she'd be pretty much incoherent.
I have had SOB issues my whole life stemming from asthma and it's one thing that cannot be ignored, considering our very life depends on taking x number of breaths each minute/hour/day. When a person counts each one, panic sets in in short order.
Leave her alone to make her own adult phone call if and when the situation warrants doing so.
I have been hospitalized for my asthma. It’s awful.
You could consider calling 911 and sending them to her home, explaining why you aren't there and that she might refuse help. If no one is her PoA and she doesn't have a diagnosis of cognitive/memory issues in her medical records, then they can't make her go to the ER or receive treatment. After this it may be time to call in APS to report her as a vulnerable adult.
Your answer to the questions will guide what advice is give to you, so please give more info.
BUT do not expect a reply. This is just information that the medical staff would appreciate and will probably discuss with mom at her next appointment.
If mom is able to care for herself then back off.
1 call to mom to ask if she called the doctors office is sufficient.
(did you like it when she called you several times a day to ask you the same question? I bet not)
If she does not have one next time you are out pick up a pulse oximeter. Inexpensive and a good device to have on hand (no pun intended)
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