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Hospice is not going to do anything to speed up an elders passing anyway.....so being ineligible for hospice has little bearing on your father's desire to leave this life. If he's depressed, speak to his PCP about medication to address it, same with pain. Pain should be managed well so he's comfortable and not upset daily with being unable to cope.

Sometimes a person reaches the end of the road with wanting their journey to continue. What CAN you do but offer a sympathetic ear to listen and a hand to hold? My mother expressed a desire to die, all the time actually, and I acknowledged it. I told her I understood fully. She was 95 w advanced dementia and CHF and was done living. I get it. I used to tell her that obviously God still had plans for her, however, that we were not privy to. So when He was ready, she'd go home and see her siblings and parents again.

Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
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chekylildevil Jun 2023
So beautifully said and explained!
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Parkinsons is a tough illness. Agree with probable depression. Consider meds for his mood (been there, done that and the right dosage and right meds will help a lot).

If he's resistant to taking meds, it is ok to use a therapeutic fib to get it to happen (the meds are "vitamins" or for "pain" or whatever story you think will work). I wish you both peace in your hearts!
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Palliative care consult. Discuss options honestly.

Be certain there is a POA for health care and an advanced directive that recognizes these wishes.
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