Can a Power of Attorney refuse to allow family members to visit their mother who is competent and requesting visits?

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Can a Power of Attorney refuse to allow family members to visit their mother who is competent and requesting visits?

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POA is one of the mother’s children.

She is currently living in one of her rental homes with the POA, his wife, adult granddaughter and her boyfriend. This was to be temporary while the mother received rehab. treatment. Treatment was completed months ago.

The mother wants to move back home and could with some limited daily help. She has requested the POA make it happen for months. No movement has been made by the POA.

After numerous requests by the mother's other sons the mother was allowed to visit and spend a weekend with one. For the first time in almost a year she was able to see all her other children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

During that visit the mother slowly opened up and shared concerning facts about her treatment, and care while living with the POA's family. She asked to extend her visit and shared she was scarred to return to the POA, in fear of retaliation for sharing and not following all their rules while she was visiting.

The POA was contacted and when informed by his mother of her desire he refused to allow her to extend her stay. POA refused to bring her additional medicine so she could stay a few days longer. Advised he would block any efforts to secure additional medicine at the RX so that she could extend her stay... ETC.... to avoid arguing the mother eventually agreed to return to them (as she had several doctor visits for that week). It was agreed she would return to her other sons home for an extended visit in 3 days (after the doctor visits, the second son had offered to take his mother to the doctor visits but the POA refused).

When the day came for the return visit the POA refused to allow the visit. The POA has further refused that son from coming to visit or even to face to face check on his mother. A third son is also denied visitation. The POA will not allow either son to speak to mother on the phone.

The POA offers no reason for not allowing the visit; he just refuses it, stating he has the power and authority to do so.

POA advises mother is competent.

What action is appropiate?

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If Mom is competent and doesn't like the way she is being treated by the POA, why doesn't she simply revoke that designation and assign that to someone else?

We all know that having POA does not confer the powers that the current holder thinks it does, but if that is what he is using as justification, then remove it. I don't understand why this hasn't been done.

What the brothers need to do at this point, I think, is get an attorney.

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She would like to but hard to do when she cannot leave the home, isn't allowed to use the phone, has no veh and even if she did she can no longer drive. The brothers were there to visit and upon seeing what they did to remove her if that is what she wanted.

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planeman...thank you for your comments.... it does appear she is being held against her will....perhaps the district attorney is the way to go. Thank you.

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Is their a restraining order? If not just go see the person.

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Report suspected Elderly Abuse, it will be investigated.

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How does the rest of the family get to see a copy of a DPOa

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Can my sister who is durable medical POA for my 81 year old mother in the stages of demntia refuse my visitation of her with her being in anursing home in Michigan?

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I am having a similar issue with my sister. She is has POA for my mother who is currently at her home in CT, recovering from some minor outpatient surgery that was discovered while she was there. A follow up appointment next week. Then she hopes to return to her longtime companion in Florida where she lives - and from whom my sister drugged and kidnapped her from after an incident caused by my mother's onset of dementia which my sister has refused to deal with (she also holds her healthy proxy) even though we have all been asking my sister to get her treated for months as we recognized it was starting but my sister has been in denial. She had a fight with her companion and his children, took my mother back to her state, telling him - You'll never see her again. She's MINE! Now, after this medical appointment on Monday, she should be well enough to fly home. My sister tells her she will be able to return, but is telling her companion she won't be letting her. Meanwhile, she is telling me nothing. I live on the other coast. I do speak to my mother every day - except for the few days my sister turned off my mother's cell and I had to call Florida Social Services on my sister. They called the police in my sister's state and the phone was eventually turned back on. It's a terrible mess and my sister is insane and a control freak. Lying to my mother and not telling her that she is selling the home my mother and her companion live in during the summer and that she won't allow her to return to his home in FL. Her attorney - in yet another nearby state - tells me my sister doesn't have the right to prevent my mother from returning, but we were waiting until after the surgery and her recovery to see what happens, which should now be Monday. Her companion, himself recovering from heart surgery and a stroke, is extremely distressed at the idea of my mother not returning to him. His children are furious at my sister, especially at her locking him out of their long time home up north. It's a huge mess. I'm trying to help long distance but it's difficult. If my sister doesn't allow my mother to return, I want to call APS, but I've read online that CT, my sister's state, has a low budget for it and doesn't resolve much in this area. Does anyone out there know anything about how Connecticut handles APS situations? Would they help my mother return to her companion in FL?

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f Mom is competent and doesn't like the way she is being treated by the POA, why doesn't she simply revoke that designation and assign that to someone else?

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My mother is under my sister's undue influence, by legal definition. She totally trusts my sister. Doesn't realize she isn't being allowed to return. Keeps believing the new scheduled medical appointments are necessary. Some, in fact, did turn out to be, but after Monday she should be able to return. However my sister has been screaming at my mother's companion that, Yes, she's telling my mother she can return to him, but he'll never see her again. She's putting my mother in assisted living. My mother just doesn't know it yet. My mother also doesn't know that they are selling her Boston summer home out from under her. Her companion and I have both told her, but she doesn't believe my sister would ever do such a thing. Even though my sister has already had all of his things removed. My mother is totally dependent on my sister to do everything for her. Has never made plane reservations, etc. is in early stages of dementia, but not enough so her friends or attorney notice. Still drives, plays bridge, goes to lectures, classes, plays gols, out to lunches/dinners with friends, doesn't get list driving, etc. but always takes my sister's side in everything. Even against her companion. Has ALWAYS against me, so I've long given up trying to say anything bad against her. She would never revoke against my sister. Would never occur to her.

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Sorry. I realized I repeated everything. Really just need to know how good / reliable CT is with resolving APS issues. Especially in favor of victim of POA abuser. I've read on line they don't have a lot of financial support for APS.

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OMG... We are living this same circumstance right know. Was there any resolution to yours.

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I had a similar problem although my sister blocked ALL contact with my mother. Consulted CT APS who told me CT law favors your brother. Not so in other states however. Hired CT attorney who was going to take it before a judge and pursue a state conservatorship and out of the POA's care. Would have cost $30k for my sister to fight it in CT - which we figured she wouldn't because of cost. We managed to get my mother to FL where laws are stronger for the elderly and revoked my sister's POA, very reluctantly by my mother. We are going through a state guardianship in FL now as my mother has never been able to handle her own financial affairs and has short term memory loss (but not long term). The FL attorneys advise me the process is about $10-15k but reimbursable from her estate (living, not after her death). Consult a CT elder law attorney. Probably your only option with a crazy brother.

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I know this discussion thread in from 2011, and I logged on to read the stories long after my own debacle with a controlling brother with POA for our mother. Sadly, the only answer on how to avoid this mess is to be hyper vigilant on who takes care of an elderly parent, health wise and financially. Sometimes, a parent can be transfixed by a bullying member of the family who can upset the entire twilight years for mom or dad and rest of family. Undue influence, imprisoning, drugging them and putting them in terrible states of being are so common, my own story, that govt and state agencies usually will not get involved. Lawyers are so expensive, and never guarantee relief, mostly it gets worse after this due to legal wrangling, hearsay, lies by the controlling sibling, all because he has POA authority. All of the burden of proof is on the innocent family member(s) and if mom is frightened to speak up, there is no way to change the matters to simply protect a loved one. Mom has to be adamant that she wants change; if she can't do that as she has to be honest that her child has betrayed her, which is a difficult thing for any mother, she will and her loved ones will have to accept the situation. I know very well the sadness and powerlessness of trying to fight for my mom when she couldn't admit what her son was doing, it nearly destroyed me. I had to let it go. Thankfully I can still see her but not bring her to my home for dinner anymore or take her off of her nursing home grounds, or go to her Drs, or speak about her care with her care team. Live each day, love yourself and have your own life, believe you are a blessed child of a higher power that is with you thruout these trying times. Sometimes others journeys are just that, and we have to step back finally.

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continue refuels of a son to visit his mother is this unlawful

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Can power of attorny be in place to stop family members from removing individual out of living facility

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I have a assistant living facility and the son want the mother to stay at the facility, and feeling the brother will try to remove the mother. can a power of attorney prevent this from happen on the brother in.

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continue ... If the facility hold the power of attorney, not the son ?

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My mother in law is POA over my father-in-law whom she placed in a memory care section of a local home Aug.30,2016. We were told we didn't need to go thru her to take him out for day trips. We took him out for the day to our house for Thanksgiving & returned him by 830pm. We were given his meds for the day & times. We did as told. Couple of days later received a letter from mother in law stating we can only take him out with her permission & only 9am-5pm. This was not a letter drafted by a lawyer. Does she have the right to restrict our time with him & ask her for permission? We do try to visit every day as he's less than 8miles away. Since he was admitted we've only missed seeing him 16days due to wedding out of state for my brother. My husband did call & talk with his father every other day. I had left cards and notes for him that the staff gave to him on the days they didn't talk. The other 2 children dont visit other than the family friends picnic the home had back in Sept. My mother in law doesn't visit often. Sounds like every 10days or so. My father in law doesn't remember my name but he knows he likes me & knows I'm his sons wife so we are aware that he's slipping away. He seems to have enjoyed his car rides & when we bring him to our house.

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Hi - I don't think she legally has the power to do that unless it is written in the POA. She sounds very controlling. Who told you you did not have to go through her to take fil out on day trips? It would be a shame to deprive him of outings that he enjoys. On the other hand I am sure, in the interests of smooth family dynamics, that you don't want to get into a battle with her. Can her son, your husband, have a chat with her to try to sort it out? Can you ask the person who told you you did not have to go through her for day trips to be a go between? Do you have any idea why she is being so restrictive? Sounds like you and your hub have a great relationship with fil and she may be jealous.

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Can a Power of Attorney refuse to allow family members to visit their mother who is competent and requesting visits?

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