I just saw a question on here which most likely wasn't posted by my sister, even though the username is pretty much the nickname that she had as a kid. But it really got me thinking. This person is claiming they have POA, which she basically does, and they're asking about what they should do to get a house ready for sale. So I thought I would ask this question for my own protection. As somebody who has been living here for 3 years, and who is one of the four children, so would be on the wheel, or if there is no will, would definitely be entitled to a fourth of the property, can my sister start proceedings on selling the house without giving me proper notice? I saw all sort of responses where people were telling her to just have a company come to clear out the house, which alarmed me, because a good bit of the stuff is mine, so I don't even know if legally that can happen. But my family has been so horrible of late that I don't know if I would totally write off the possibility of them trying to pull something like this. So I guess I'm wondering what my rights are in this situation, as someone who was caregiver for my mom for 3 years, and who has lived here for 3 years. I live in Maryland and I don't know if there's rules that protect the person currently residing, although I know there are specifically for Medicaid.
I'm assuming that if you've been living at home with your mother and are her caregiver that her POA is the one handling her financial affairs.
Who writes the checks out every month to pay the household bills like electricity and gas at your mother's house?
If the signature on your mother's checks is someone else's name and the letters (POA) are signed after the name, then that's the person handling your mother's finances.
If your mother is still doing this, then she's still in charge and can tell the POA to go pound sand, or she can change it to another person.
Your sister has no legal right to go ahead and sell your mother's house. She's not in a nursing home and her property is protected from Medicaid coming after it for payment.
You'd probably be better off putting your mother in a care facility and letting the house be sold. Then take your share of the money and move somewhere else.
"I understand the stress put on one sibling for a parent when the other kids drop it all on you. I lived in another state where I loved my life and home. My brothers,all retired, asked if I could move closer to share the care of my mom.I sold my house and my life to help. Little did I know is what they meant was for me to take on all responsibility of her care. I take care of groceries, bills ,Dr visits and all financial issues.For the last 4 years I have been dealing with her all by myself with no visits from her sons who all live within a 10 mile radiance.. The stress has gotten so bad sometimes that I have just exploded and left her in her melt downs. I also found out that as long as I was there it fed her anxiety attacks.I guess it was the fact that someone was there to listen.She is now going into the later stages of dementia so I am having to put her in a care facility. I worry that when it is all said and done and she has past away I will never have anything to do with my brothers again. So sad. But unfortunately leaving it to one person to deal with the parent is the norm. Everyone I have talked to in this situation says the same thing. Maybe it's just that they don't want the memory of how the mother has changed from before.I sometime wonder if I were in their spot and one of them was taking care of mom would I have fallen into the same action as they are. I wouldn't think so but who knows. Watching ones love one going down isn't pleasant.
Making the decision of putting her in a home is the hardest decision you will make but also the most freeing. The stress level dropped instantly.With her every day saying she wished she was dead and the playing on my emotions so I will do what she wants I realized it was time for professionals to take over. The place she is going is wonderful and I can visit all I want without the stress of wondering if she is out and about,not knowing who she is, walking the neighborhood . I hope this has helped some but if nothing else you know you are not alone." This doesn't sound like your sister.
You are currently residing in your mom's home and you have a caregiver exemption from Medicaid which will prevent Medicaid from putting a lien on the house after your mother's death.
But if you want to continue to live there, you are going to need to be able to pay the property taxes and insuranve and upkeep. Sound to me as though you'd be much better off if the house were sold, the proceeds split; you can use your share for a rental or condo.
Are you getting SSDI?