Hello! This is my first post here. I am Patricia..and just needed to vent. My grandmother got diagnostized with diabetes when I was only 4. I am only child of a single mother, yes,I have an aunt and an uncle, but they live far away from us. For more than 10 years, my grandmother was going great! she was such a strong lady, laughing, telling jokes, watering her flowers..and everything!
Until last week... as I type this, we are waiting for the results of her blood tests. They don´t know if she has an stomach/bladder infection, or she is just dealing with health complications related to her diabetes. Anyways, the doctor told us not to expect too much. And I am very scared. I know that whatever it is going to happen...it is going to happen, but I feel like I needed to talk to someone.
And for Celticlass, I second what Standing Alone says... it's all part of this life cycle. My father used to say death is as natural as life, and you cannot have one without the other.... I am a believer in a higher power/God, and I really believe we'll understand WHY it has to be this way when we die, and it will all be ok. In the meantime the pain is real and acute when we lose someone, or when we are preparing to. When my father went into the hospital at 89 yrs old for congestive heart failure in '09, mom called and said 'get here'.... I flew right up and didn't leave his bedside. Within a few days of my arrival, the most important man in my life was fading fast on morphine. While I wanted to hang onto him, after about 8 hours at his bedside I had to stretch and slip out for fresh air and I was gone 10 minutes. 10 freaking minutes... I came back to the 2 nurses blocking the entrance with the news he had passed. Still, I didn't leave. I stayed for another 1-1/2 hours talking to him and even got in bed with him. Now it's going on 5 years later and I still can't fully let go. We never can. As dad said, "In the end, love is all that matters" and I believe that love never, ever dies. That love you share will sustain you...for the rest of your life. Just know you too are not alone. We are all in this thing together.
i speed read so ive read the whole book. the end was rather anticlimactical.
hope your grandmother is ok. im just getting coffee-d up for another day of wood cutting -- and being an ass..