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She had always thought very highly of herself and would not believe most of what other people say, and it gets worse as she becomes older. When she meets problems, for example she can't find something, she assumes I stole it, when she gets stomachaches, she thinks my father has poisoned her, she even thinks her neighbor is stalking her, and trying to harm her whenever she lets her guard down, and after she moves to another place the same thing happened with the new neighbor. It's always someone out there being jealous of her and try to hurt her. I tried my best to reason with her and told her to visit a doctor but she wouldn't listen. She believes she understands herself better than any doctor. I just don't know what to do anymore and am afraid of her becoming completely insane. I am only 18 and feel very stressed out living with her. She grew up in a poor family, didn't receive proper care from her parents, and had to work very hard to make ends meet if that helps in understanding her condition.

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My mother always suffered from mental illness while I was a kid growing up in her house. She refused to get help for herself, so I was all alone trying to deal with her histrionics and nonsense. I used to keep a black & white marble notebook listing the things she did, so there would be documentation for when she was taken away for evaluation one day. Which never actually happened. My only goal was to get OUT of that house and I did, when I was 17. She never did get help or anti depressants or anti anxiety meds or anti psychotics, nothing.

She's 94 now with advanced dementia and back in my life completely for the past 10 years. I'm an only 'child'. She lives in a Memory Care Assisted Living place and now takes plenty of anti depressants, but nothing works.

You can't fix this, just like I couldn't fix my mother. THEY have to WANT to fix THEMSELVES and some mental illnesses prevent them from even recognizing the fact they're sick.

The best answer is to remove yourself from the lunacy. ASAP. It's not that you don't 'love' your mother; it's that you love YOURSELF more.

It's okay to take care of YOU. And hopefully, she will take care of HER.

Good luck
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This is mental illness, almost certainly, and your Mom should be evaluated and treated. For your own good it will be important that you get out on your own as soon as possible, whether that means college or a job or both. You should not have to feel responsible for a Mom who won't get herself help. Without help your Mom stands no chance of improving, really. I surely do wish you luck.
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There are mental illnesses (I am thinking of serious depression and/or schizophrenia) that have delusions as symptoms.

Call mom's doctor and tell her/him your observations.

If mom doesn't have a doctor, call your local branch of NAMI and ask for their guidance. https://www.nami.org/Home

Most importantly, you need to take care of you. We have a wise poster here named Beatty who says "There will be no solution while YOU are the solution.

The best hope for mom to get help is for you to start your life, your education and start a productive career. Mom's problems will become apparent to others and hopefully, she will be forced to get help.
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Palapala, make an appointment with your Mom's primary doctor and have your Mom checked for an Urinary Tract Infection [UTI]. Such an infection can cause the issues you are experiencing with your Mom. It's worth having it checked out.

I know you mentioned your Mom rather not go to her doctor, but in this matter you can use what is called "therapeutic fib".... you can tell your Mom that she would lose her heath insurance if she doesn't go to her primary doctor at least twice a year.... yes, it a fib, but if it works, that is great.
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Possibly medication related? I have observed my 55 year old otherwise mentally sound husband have delusions while being on Lyrica. And manic episodes and delusions after coming off Cymbalta. Hopefully she can get checked out and see if she might need a med evaluation.
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Usually it appears in 60’s and older but she could have early onset dementia

Many situations can cause confusion.

Call her doctor to discuss it.
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Sounds like perhaps she has some other mental issues other than dementia, as 48 is awful young for that. Until she agrees to seek help, or even admits that she has an issue, there's really nothing you can do. Thank God though that you're 18 yrs old and can move out and away from your delusional mom. I would(if you haven't already)do that sooner than later. Best wishes.
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48 seems too young to have dementia. Is there early onset dementia in your family history? Is there short term memory loss? Is there hallucination, seeing things that’s not there?

It might be that there is some sort of narcissistic, paranoid personality disorder.

it could also be menopause. Hormones imbalance can effect brain function too.
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I agree with Alva and Barb. Your Mom probably has and has had a mental illness. Could stem from her childhood but she needs help. If you are still in School, speak with the School guidance counselor, Social Worker or guidance counselor. This is not something you should have to deal with.
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