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a feeding tube has been suggested. She is not bedridden yet. However, she is in a nursing home. Has anyone been faced with this situation?

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OMG. My Dad was in a nursing home and started "pocketing" his food in his jaws and not swallowing it. I agreed to have a feeding tube inserted, which I regret to this very day because he passed away TWO DAYS LATER, in a massive amount of pain.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, have the nurses completely undress your Mom and check her entire body for pressure sores, (bed sores). My Dad had stage 4 pressure sores on his body which they hid quite well, and which was the cause of him not eating. He was riddled with infection from stage 4 bedsores! He eventually went into sepsis shock syndrome from infection.
I hope this is not the same situation, but I wanted you to be aware of what happened to my Dad and to make SURE this isn't happening to your Mom.
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I am very grateful that my mom ate so well at thanksgiving. I gut up her turkey, and we had sweet potaotes and stuffing, all of which she was able to eat. Een sringbeans. In fact I am so happily surprsed and it made making the dinner for the two of us worth it.
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Dear ecp,
this is what happens. It happened to my mom because she would get the food in her mouth and then not know what to do with it.
Her time is near and all you can do is just be very very patient and feed her.
A feeding tube is ridiculous as you have read above because of the unnecessary pain and anguish that it causes all involved, especially your mom.
for a nursing home the feeding tube makes sense because they don't have the man hours to be able to sit and wait for a person to eat and swallow.
good luck and know that the caregivers on this site will help you through whatever you face.
Please take a minute and update us on your mom's situation.
lovbob
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My mom had the same problem. At first she was just forgetting to chew and swallow, so I would put cards on her table with the words "chew" and "swallow" on them. Then as her condition progressed, when she did chew and swallow, it was so hard for her, and she was eating very little, and had lost weight. Her nursing home tried the thickener, but it did not help. Her swallowing was evaluated, and it was determined that there was danger of aspiration pneumonia. Her physician ordered here to have a feed tube installed. At first they tried the nasal tube, but she pulled it out and efforts to keep her from doing so were not acceptable. So it was agreed that she would have a feeding tube surgically installed. Yes, it did cause discomfort, but only for a short time. For her it was the best thing because she gained back normal weight. She lived 1 1/2 years after this and never complained. She did not communicate much, so I asked her to tell me where the baby (her doll) was unhappy. When she had the nasal tube, she pointed to the doll's nose. Immediately after the surgery, she pointed to the doll's stomach. After a couple of days, she no longer pointed to any place. So she felt no pain. For her, it was the best thing.
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Hi Oldmaid, you are posting on a very old thread (7 years!) so unfortunately many people will not see your question.

Do some reading on this site and on the web about dysphagia (difficulty swallowing), there are many good discussions about how to modify food to make it palatable.

Meat is often the first thing to cause difficulty and the hardest thing to modify, you will need to invest in a good food processor and totally puree it like you would baby food, then serve it as a sauce or gravy or incorporate it into dishes like spaghetti, shepherds pie, your favourite casseroles or even meatloaf.
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Hi,
I found this site looking for meals for my 90 year old mother. I will pray for all of you and your parents. I know that we all need it. There are a couple of recommendations that I would make. My mother too has problems swallowing. She loved her orange juice which seems to be too acidic and water right after waking up makes her cough even though she is thirsty. I searched to find some kind of juice & the speech therapist suggested things being the consistency of nectar. I found pear nectar in the Latino Section of the supermarket. She loves it & calls it the nectar of the gods. It is thick and refreshing. It has all sorts of good things in it as well. I also give her chocolate milk with her lunch and dinner. I sneak in Carnation Breakfast Essentials High Protein Rich Milk Chocolate which also has vitamins etc and tastes like regular chocolate milk she can't taste the difference. It does not have the metallic strange taste of Ensure. It comes in bottles in the cereal section of the grocery. Ask for it. Mother also likes chocolate pudding ( I try to get the one with the most calories-Hershey's & of course whip cream), Cozy Shack cinnamon pudding with raisins has become her favorite. I have mother at home with me, & I bought an air mattress overlay which cost about $300. The air mattresses are so expensive (thousands of dollars) but this has done the trick. She is bed bound and needs to be lifted from the bed by the wheel chair van man. I can't lift her, but she goes to mass on Sun., the doctors, and gets out of bed to get her hair done at home every two weeks. She has not had any bedsores & has been this way for at least 7 years. The good care of the nurse's aides & the mattress overlay may have prevented them. Do check the air mattress overlay it comes with an air pump which goes right over the foot of the bed. It is very easy. My question is does anyone know of recipes for meat or fish that would be easy to eat & delicious. Mother
doesn't seem to be able to eat meat- she chews it & spits it out. She wants steak, lamb chops, etc... but I don't know how much she is getting out of it. I have tried hamburgers and meatloaf, and it seems the same way. The only fish that she says she likes is sword fish & I have seen her spit it out after chewing it as well. Any ideas? I teach school & have the nurse's aid give her Stouffer's Lean Cusine Comfort Foods like Turkey, sweet potatoes & stuffing. She likes it, but she leaves the turkey lately. THANKS FOR ANY HELP!
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Blitz it up to a thick soup. Still has all the goodness but easy to swallow. You can blitz almost  anything.

Fish and rice cakes.  Held together with a little egg or potato but still kept soft. Serve with creamy mash.

Good luck.
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There is a product called " Thick-it" that you can add to water, o.j. or any liquid to make it nectar-like thickness.
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As you can see, this isn't unusual at all.
My mom has pretty much lost all interest in food and lives on ENSURE, which started to cause some digestive problems,
she also had the same the problem swallowing, a speech therapist was brought in but I think she just had to be a little more deliberate about eating and swallowing.
Tey to avoid the feeding tube.
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My sister cares for a woman who is in a nursing home and has lost her interest in food partially because of the swallowing issue, and partially because she can't control the food well (drops sandwiches, etc). So my sister stops in daily and makes her a delicious protein meal replacement shake which she absolutely loves and consumes very well, even trying to lick the residue from the glass. It's not made ice cold, but rather with room temperature water, whisked into a sort of pudding consistency. She looks forward to this, and happily anticipates the treat when my sister comes to see her. Being in powder form, you can control the consistency, unlike the bottled drinks or canned ones.
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