Hides everything from me. Refuses any help I offer. She is now refusing to go to any appointments. She will not answer the phone when I call. Will not talk to me when I visit. Has told the staff at Assisted Living that she does not want to talk to me.
I feel physically ill when I go to the facility where she lives. My doctor has told me to only go when totally necessary.
I have read this is common but it sure hurts.
If this has come in suddenly, it could be a UTI.
Did u place Mom recently, if so you are the bad guy. Caregivers in general are the bad guys. Because we now have to take on the parent roll and them the childs.
I also agree she may now need meds for her anxiety and paranoia. This may mean she needs an a la carte additional service to administer them to her.
In my limited personal experience the paranoia doesn't last forever but there's no telling how long.
I also agree to limit the number and lengths of your visits. When with her, redirect or distract when she makes accusations or paranoid comments -- you will never convince her anyway so save your emotional energy. I'm so sorry for this... it is very distressing. It takes practice to remind yourself it is her disease and to not take it personally.
If this behavior is sudden or new she needs to be checked for a UTI which can cause severe agitation and hallucination.
I am so sorry. This is a great tragedy, but it can be the face of dementia, and there's little to be done about it. Do check in with doctor and have a urine C&S requested.
thank you for your suggestions. Maybe I should just stay away.