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Been there. Every move takes my Dad about three weeks to adjust. Hip replaced last August. Another fracture two months later. Senior housing couldn’t handle his falls any more. Now in his second memory care, one week in, not happy, totally lost. I’m praying the next two weeks goes fast and he’s feeling more settled. Time and routine is the only thing that has helped.
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I'm very sorry about what happened to your mom. After initial healing, she will require facility placement. Any fractures?
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Lymie61 Mar 2023
”After initial healing she will require facility placement” seems like a heavy statement even if it were coming from a doctor that has never seen her or even looked at her records. Some might even argue irresponsible.
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Talk to her family dr and see what the best option is to help her. You need help you with this. Her dr may keep her in there depending on how bad she really is. If she needs constant help you want her to be somewhere that keeps her safe. The drs put my mom in the nursing home because of her falling and dementia. That was the best thing they did for her because she has had no falling in there and has not been in the hospital every other day.
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The nurses have seen it over & over again. Your Mom needs full time monitoring and one person cannot do it all. Get help to put her in the right place for her, and check all funding resources!zYou’ve reached the no-longer-tenable stage. Best of luck & empathy from someone who’s been there!
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Are you able to hire a caregiver to help with her care while she is in rehab? I had to do that for my daddy and it gave me relief and peace.

Yes, it is common for our elders to become confused and have increased dementia in a strange place. Her sundowning may be worse too. You can speak with the care team about a mild med for anxiety. Be careful that she is not over medicated. Feel free to speak up if the meds are too strong.

Forget about help from your sister and do what needs to be done.

If mom has no fractures she needs to be at least moved to a wheelchair and be out and about.

Most important please take care of yourself. This is a very hard time for you!
Thank you for caring so about your mom..
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So sorry. You are right..a living nightmare indeed. My mom just jumped from a Stage 3 to stage 6 Lewy Body after/during her 30 days in hospital then rehab. She had delirium, then exaggerated dementia . 80 days later she has been getting worse on a daily basis.. We are no longer allowing any hospital stays or rehabs again. Hospice status is being looked at to avoid hospital admissions. I am exhausted. Good Luck.
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InFamilyService Mar 2023
Good decision for your mom. I made the same plans for my mom. No hospital and no rehab.
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I cannot offer any advice, just to say falls will happen.
My husband has Parkinson’s and falls are more frequent. Recent one was terrifying, I just turn around to get him some water, few seconds, he fell backwards and cracked his skull. Imagine blood on white tiles, everywhere and so much I panicked, Luckily only few stitches were needed, but, reality is I know there is nothing to prevent falls 100% and staggering number of people fall everyday and die. Common with PD, that and choking which is more with disease advancing. I have to accept it, he is almost never alone, but, it takes only seconds.
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Mamadrama, nurses see elderly folk who fall, who become delirius all the time (unfortunately).

What injuries has your poor Mom sustained?
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A fall.
You are in the *crises stage* now.
Breathe. Ensure you eat, sleep, exercise if you can.

The future will be revealed slowly.

Note that *Delerium* can happen to the elderly. When unwell, injured, under stress, in crises, in hospital. Delirium differs from dementia & can lift.

One day at a time is good advice.

PS Tears are quite ok. I think of them as little gems of adjustment. Shed them as you need. (((Hugs)))
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I’m so sorry to hear this. You have a lot on your plate. It is so hard to see a beloved parent like this. No advice but thinking of you.
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I am so sorry. I hope you will try to take this a day at a time. As an RN we OFTEN saw confusion, almost a hospital induced psychosis, when elderly patients entered into care. It is a terrible shock to their system along with whatever illness brought them into care. For most, a return to their own environment has them back to their normal status quickly enough. But only time will tell. For now, try to take things a day at a time and don't try to jump too far ahead.

Again, I am so sorry. Get rest and care for yourself so you can endure.
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mamadrama Mar 2023
Thank u so much for your reply. She’s on day 2 and refusing to eat, exhausted and out of it. Confused what day it is or time. She hasn’t been this bad before. I’m terribly worried! The nurses don’t seem as concerned.
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