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My dad had a massive stroke how can my mom get power of attorney if my dad is in a skilled nursing facility? They have been married for over 59 years. We don't know what to do. We cannot afford to pay for his care. Kaiser only pays 100 days. My mom cannot do anything with property without power of attorney

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Stillsane depends on the jurisdiction but what I have written is fairly standard and serves the purpose. It is always best with elderly to have a family member on the account and we do not preach this enough and this type of problem can be ugly.
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I thought all you needed were two physician letters stating that he is incapable of handling his financial and other affairs. That's what everyone needed for me here in California.
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Remember a POA dies when the patient dies. Did he ever make a will with details when he passes. Frankly, can he do an X with assistance and a witness non family member in front of a Notary who can go to the nursing home, that should be the instrument that will be of help. The doctor must attest his condition and sign in front of a notary for safeguard. This is the route, a shortcut for the moment.
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She cannot get POA. By virtue of them being married your mother can call the shots by virtue of being his wife. As his wife she can decide what does and what does not get done. Is there someone standing in her way?
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visit with your county attorney and have paperwork from his doctor with his condition stating he needs a guardianship and that will start the ball rolling.
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You need to talk to the Social Worker at the home. They should have gone over what is paid and what is not. At that time you could have told them there is no money. They could help u with Medicaid. Mom will not have to sell the house. She will be allowed to live in it. If Social Worker doesn't help then you need to go to Medicaid. You need to get certain things together so don't wait.
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Your mom will need to be appointed guardian and conservator of your dad. For this, an appearance in court is needed, thus she will need the assistance of an attorney. There really is no other way for her to get control over his assets and his personal and medical decisions.
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See if your state has a DADS website (Dept of Aging & Disability Services). They can help you find a state run Nursing Facility or intervene if you have problems with your current situation.
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Have the treating doctor declare him incompetent. This form should be filed with the county where he lives. Petition the Court for guardianship & conservator. Contact the social worker in the facility where he is being cared for. They will help you fill out all the financial aid forms to apply for Medicaid. Where I live you have to provide 5 years of financial records to make sure you are not hiding assets to get aid. The home is not considered an asset at this time. Is your mom's name on the title of the house? They will not displace your mom. Do not sell the house because the money then becomes a liquid assets and they will use all that money up before they assist with finances.
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Definitely, don't do anything or SIGN anything until you talk to an attorney that specializes in Medicaid. That's a very important distinction. I reached out to elder law attorneys & found that there is a BIG difference. They must KNOW the process/experience navigating it and not try to "learn as they go".
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I found this article, hope it helps http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/financial-powers-of-attorney-do-30061.html
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Listen to all the above and don't make the error I did of writing checks for my husband's hospital bills from my checking account, figuring I could later reimburse myself from his accounts. The hospital now claims I paid out of my own free will.
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Please call the local area of the aging. Where I live, there are law professors/lawyers at one of the local law schools that provide elder care attorneys for free to people over 65.
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She would have to become his Guardian.
This process sucks!!!
Everything that she does will have to be approved by the court. (at least it was in the state and county where we lived)
But once she obtains Guardianship she can sell the house if needed, she can make all decisions both medical and financial.
I suggest that you find a lawyer that knows Elder Law they will be able to guide you in the proper procedures.
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If you call your state bar association, you can ask for the name of a lawyer who works on contingency. You may also try talking to the hospital staff if he's hospitalized or even the head department of nursing if he's in a nursing home to see what they say
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Hi.
The same happened to my father in January 2016 the day he arrived from Canada to spend some time here after my youngest sister passed. I live in Portugal where the law goes at the pace of a turtle. We had to hire home care due to his situation which requires a lot of money and we know he has more than enough but always did his best to keep it out of our reach. We hired a lawyer ONE YEAR AND THREE MONTHS AGO, already payed a fortune for the process, and still no resolution. It's revolting. Fortunately he had given me access to his Portuguese account a number of years ago and my brother also has access to some of his money which is what we have been using to pay for his very costly care.
I'm sure you'll be able but you'll have to spend on an attorney first!
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What kind of property does she need to do something with? Is this property in his name only? Are you sure she needs POA to handle this?

Consulting an attorney who specializes in Elder Law (the specialty is very important) will be worth the cost. Mistakes at this point can be costly.
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There are emergency guardian procedures, the nursing home may be able to help with that. An attorney would be best. Call the Area Agency on Aging for help on where to go and what to do next.
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I agree with Barb. You can't afford not to go to an elder attorney who understands Medicaid law for your state. Are you in California? My friend called the area on aging for her sister who lives there in Orange Co. They sent out a social worker who helped get her sister in touch with Kaiser, whose rep also visited and helped the sister get going with doctors and therapists.
About the POA. Your mom won't be able to get POA unless your dad regains his mental capacity. If he does and still can't use his hand to sign a document, there are ways to receive his agreement. Do not sign anything as a guarantor for your dad and don't allow your mom to. Please see a qualified elder attorney to protect your parents.
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Obviously, Dad cannot sign a POA if he is a vegetative state.

Have you talked to the SW at the NH? Much depends upon the laws of your state. Do you have a family lawyer?

If dad needs medicaid to be able to stay in the NH as a permanent resident, please know that the family home where mom resides does NOT have to be sold. You need to talk to a certified eldercare attorney who understands Medicaid in your state to figure out next steps.

I'm so sorry that you are going through this sad time.
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