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I will keep $50k for her future care and give each of the grandchildren $50k each. I read somewhere about a gift tax that you can't give more than $17k to each child per year. Why? How could anyone know we gave them money? I don't get that. Worst case though if we have to document it (which I still don't get why you have to) can we deduct the gift to the grandkids against the capital gains for her?

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You should NOT do this without the guidance of a tax attorney. 1st off, she will have to pay taxes on the capital gains, less any investment, has to be documented, that increased the property value, ie hardscaping, additions etc.

The IRS will know that mom got the money and it will create flags when her account(s) are suddenly missing 300k.

Get professional advice and consider keeping moms money hers until anyone is entitled to inheritance (after her death). Because the 5 year look back could come in to play with her being 90, you just never know what tomorrow holds, don't put her in a bad situation by trying to hide assets and avoid taxes, it really is not worth it.
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First, $50K isn't much for care. If she goes into a good facility (AL) it can cost several thousands per month, and more if she needs MC. Since the Medicaid Look-back period is 5 years, $50K divided by 60 months = $833.34 per month for care. Gifting away money means she will delay or disqualify her from Medicaid. And she won't be saving enough for her care. She needs to do more homework and price out in-home private care, agency care and facility care. It is all expensive, and the more medical type of care one needs, it goes even higher.

There has been a limit on cash gifting in general over the years. It's gone up a little every year. I think banks have to report the movement of money, this is why my MIL hasn't had to reapply to Medicaid after being on if for 2 years... it's called electronic reporting (I read about this in my state's Medicaid website). The banks know and the government knows. How do you think the IRS figures out people are evading taxes?

Please don't let her do this without consulting with a Medicaid Planner for Florida. The Medicaid financial application look-back period is 5 years in FL (I am PoA for a relative there, too). That means it can request bank statements and tax documents from 5 years ago when she needs to apply. Also consult an estate planner. She may be able to create a trust if she has enough cognitive capacity and the funds to do it.

She does not want to get sideways on this.
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Does she have a will? If not, why not? You’d better hasten yourself to an estate attorney’s office. Your plan to raid mom’s money while she still needs it for her care is a disaster in the making.
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The $17,000 annual limit is only the maximum you can give without having to file a gift tax return. If you give a total amount above that, you will have to file a gift tax return. You will not have to pay any gift taxes until you give over the lifetime maximum (too lazy to look that up, but it is in the millions).

I agree with the others that 50 grand is only going to cover about 1-2 years of AL care. In all honestly, I would not give away any of the funds until after grandma passes.
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First, I agree with others that your mom should not be gifting the proceeds from the home sale right now since you have no idea what her care needs are going to be. If you want her to have the best care possible, you should hold onto her assets to pay for this. Gifting will impact any future Medicaid application. And since she has assets, they should be spent on her care in any case. The grandchildren can be remembered in her will.

Second, as to taxes on the home sale, the first $250,000 in capital gains from a home sale are excluded from capital gains taxes. Moreover, in figuring the "profit" from a home sale (i.e., capital gain) the basis is not just the initial cost of the home but also any money spent on improvements plus any closing costs at the time the house was bought. And the current closing costs at the time of sale are also excludable. You may find that there isn't actually the taxable "profit" you are thinking there will be.
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My mother pays $4,800 per month for AL. My step-mother pays $5,700 per month in MC. My mother is 98, your mother could live that long.

Inheritance comes after death, not before.

Under these circumstances the 50K would last a year at best. Then what?

I would get her a good tax preparer and an estate attorney.
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My friend had round-the-clock in-home caregivers for her Mom (here in MN) in the final year of her life. She had strokes, bad aphasia, and other issues. The daughters didn't want her to go into a LTC facility. She told me it was costing $12K per month. Not covered by any insurance.
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LilyLavalle Jan 31, 2024
This is about what my mom will be paying when we finally have caregivers 7 nights per week (not covered by insurance). The facility that could be the next step for mom is $18,000/month. It's not top notch or fancy by any means. And none if it is covered by Medicare.
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This is fraud and theft? Who in the world gave you the idea that you can use your mother's assets in this way?
You, as POA are LEGALLY responsible to be knowing not to do something such as you are describing.
You need to see an attorney at once. Elder law. You need education in how to do POA and in how to keep meticulous records.
Do know that selling your mother's home and passing money to her heirs WHILE SHE IS LIVING is THEFT and FRAUD.
Those who are POA or guardian are held to a HUGE liability under the law.

I cannot imagine that anyone you have discussed this with has not warned you against such a thing. Your mother's assets ARE FOR HER CARE, not for her children and grandchildren unless she has died with remainders in her estate.

Please get help at once.
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SprirtCare Jan 31, 2024
How do you know mom isn’t directing this? Maybe mom is a multimillionaire. I’m surprised you didn’t scream mom has dementia and needs to be in memory care like you usually do.
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Medicaid also does not recognize the 17k that the IRS allows. All Moms proceeds from the house need to be put in an acct in her name and only used for her care. Grandchildren can be named in her Will, which is a "just in case". Just in case I die, just in case I don't spend it all.

Never understood why grandchildren should be thought to inherit a grandparents money. My Will only mentions my daughters. If my daughter wants to give some of her inheritance to her boys, thats up to her. My other daughter has no children so why should part of her inheritance go to her nephews.
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cwillie Jan 31, 2024
Your kids are more apt to be financially established and your grand kids not so much. Plus just because you leave some money to the grand kids doesn't mean you cut out those who are childless, you can divvy things up any way you want - in our circumstances the grand kids got a portion of their parent's 1/3 (three siblings ∴ 3 equal shares)
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Memory care where I live costs $8000 to $10,000 per month. That’s $96,000 per year or more. Just FYI.
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Assumedly it is your mother who wants to give the money to her grandchildren - not you. If it is you who has made the decision then Alva's response is correct. If it is your mother who has instructed you to give the grandchildren the money then as a responsible POA you should suggest to her that a small gift to each of them now is the kindest and safest thing to do. It is understandable that she might want to give them some money while she is here to see them enjoy it. But the main of her assets must be preserved for her care and you can tell her the other gifts can be written into her will. POA have a responsibility not only to keep within the law, but to act in their relative/friend's BEST INTEREST. That means making sure their money is used for current or future care, should it be needed. You would not be meeting your responsibilities as POA if you enabled your mother to make a really bad mistake.
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This has to be the worst place to ask financial questions like this. Please consult a professional who knows the law in your state.
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lealonnie1 Jan 31, 2024
Whether you like the comments and answers given on this forum or not, there is a TON of useful knowledge shared here. It is not intended to replace professional advice, naturally, as this is an internet forum.
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The place to ask financial questions and get accurate answers is www.bogleheads.org.
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Wow! You're so nice--she gets to keep 50K of her own money?!
And you get to shovel out her money and play the benefactor for your kids? Sweet deal!

And then what? Medicare so the taxpayers get to foot the burden?

Her money needs to be used to support her care while she lives-her house, her money.
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lealonnie1 Jan 31, 2024
Medicaid
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You need financial advice from a professiona. If this home was jointly owned by both your mother and father, generally--and you need to check this out with a qualified tax professional--when your father died the basis of the house changed. In other words, 1/2 of the value of the house is "stepped up" to the value on date of death. This may mean no capital gains taxes are owed.

Please get professional advice on taxes and gifting and Medicaid rules if that is what you are after.
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So if mom has a stroke within the next 5 years, she is incontinent or has memory issues. Wait till she becomes bedridden, has skin ulcers or has difficulty eating and requires a nursing home at 12 k per month. Who pays because she gifted? You? Will you take care of her 24/7 in worse condition? Medicaid will deny coverage for a certain length of time that she could have paid for her care. This is a really bad idea and us taxpayers on this forum do not take kindly when potential inheritance is doled out before it becomes an estate.
You need to see an elder lawyer with mom if she still is mentally intact to educate you and draw up an inheritance plan the right way.
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Not going into IRS / cap gains issues, but instead I’d like for you to consider the issues on future costs of care & that you think 50K will be a reasonable to cover costs.

If house sale $ is your moms only real source of future significant revenue and she does not also just happen to also have another 200K - 400K or more in savings or investments TO ALSO to use to pay for future care, your mom IMO simply does NOT have the $$$ to gift grandkids or anyone else $. Not 50K each, not 25K each, not $2,500 either. She’s going to need every bit of the 350K and maybe, just maybe, her $ will outlive her and be able to be passed onto her heirs as per her will. Maybe.

So the thought is a nest egg of…. checks notes… 50K will suffice for “her future care”. 50K, well, it will pay for like for maybe 4-6 months at best in a Nursing Home. Read that again dear, 4-6 MONTHS at best.

Costs of care are horrendous and easily run 4-6K for assisted living and double++ that for skilled nursing care in a NH per month on the average. With Memory Care somewhere in the middle. Your mom may be quite healthy and vibrant today but 1 good fall manana and all that can change and dramatically. She could easily need all of the 350 large to provide a place for her to live that enables her & you as her POA to have choices. And to have choices = able to private pay = have that 350K in some way to draw from as liquid $.

Genworth has FL at $4,371 per mo for AL which is pretty good as AL is $6,614 in New Hampshire & NJ is $7,097 on the average for those States. Families often beyond gobsmacked by the reality.

If you are somehow thinking that Medicare or Medicaid will be paying for her custodial cost to be in a facility that will not happen at all for Medicare as its health insurance and doesn’t pay custodial and for LTC Medicaid UNLESS she is able to show with detailed documentation that she is now “at need” impoverished at under 2K in assets and under $2,742 in monthly income with absolutely no gifting or transferring of any assets within the past 5 years prior to her filing for LTC Medicaid program. And also that medically she is documented to be “at need” for skilled nursing care level of services for most States LTC Medicaid program. Otherwise She would have to wait till March or April of 2029 & 5 years from now to ever even consider filing for Medicaid to pay for custodial facility care if she (or you as her POA) should gift you or her grandkids $50K or any other amount of $.

Because as she has recently sold her home, all the details on the sale and to the penny is recorded at the courthouse. Medicaid will want years of banking and financial records. House sale $ is expected to be deposited in her bank account. Between all this, any gifting will surface. Hard part in this is gifting recipient is under no obligation to repay that $. You as moms POA will be the one saddled with having to figure out how to private pay for her to stay in the NH once ineligible due to gifting and to pay the NH any past due owed to the NH and do this for the entire transfer penalty period which is based on days of ineligiblity.

If she was healthy & 80, age works in her favor not to need a NH. But at 90, it doesn’t. As her POA you have a required fiduciary duty so really give careful thought as to how much risk you want to take with her $.

As others have mentioned, Bogelheads is a terrific site for financial advice. But please keep this in mind, at age 90, she is outside of actuarial tables used for risk and for payout. So buying investment products for her will be a bit of a minefield. Choose carefully to whom you speak with and do speak with several type of financial advisers.
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lealonnie1 Feb 5, 2024
Amen. My mother was 88 and my father was 90 when they went into Assisted Living, which is less expensive than private in home care. Dad passed in 10 months and mom went on to live to 95 and 1 month. So 4 years in AL and 3 years in Memory Care Assisted Living which is significantly costlier than AL. Guess how much it cost? Just under $400K when it was all said and done. ALL of their money in its entirety, leaving very little left over! I was filling out Medicaid forms when mom passed away.

As POA, if I'd paid myself or their grandchildren ANY of their "inheritance" ahead of time, mom would've been in a SNF on Medicaid instead of living in Memory Care Assisted Living with "her girls" taking beautiful care of her. Then again, that's what some people want for their parents......Medicaid footing the bill and the parent having a roommate, etc.
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I agree with those who advised getting financial or legal help. My mom went into skilled nursing at age 91. Her LTC pays 5,000 monthly, she pays the other 4,900. SO she burns through more than 100k yearly. She’s been there 3 years. If you sell her house when she is 90, that $ will be needed for her care. I would not plan on gifting anything to anyone.
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My MIL is entering an ALF on Wed this week (I hope).

$50K will cover about 5 months of care. 5 MONTHS. While this is the most expensive ALF that the kids looked at, it isn't glamorous. And we were told there would be a COL increase next Jan. Also, she is going down FAST and we fear they will put her in Memory Care--which will be about $2K a month more. So that $50K would be gone in less than 4 months. AND she's super high maintenance so we don't even know how much 'add on' she's going to accrue each month. If she opts for meal delivery, it will add $480 a month to her bill.

They put $2500 down to hold a room. That was non-refundable, so I really think that's why they chose this place. Read the fine print!!

And nobody gets a DIME in inheritance until the person has died.
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You should contact an attorney to get advice before you start distributing any money. I don't know what the capital gains implications are and whether it is wise to make gifts at this point and if you do make gifts, what is the best way of doing it.

If you are even CONSIDERING applying for Medicaid at some point down the road, there is a five year look back and Medicaid will want to know where that money went. They want to see a paper trail. Be careful.

Keep in mind that long term care whether it is in the home or in a facility is extremely expensive. She can go through a lot of money paying for care in a relatively short number of years.

People outlive their money more and more these days. It is not unheard of to live to 100 so there has to be money available for a long long time.

The only goal is that your mother be well cared for the remainder of her life using her money so you don't have to dip into your savings. Be very careful making these decisions. I would seek professional guidance.
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