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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I agree with Eyerishlass. The bowels are an obsession with many elderly folks. My mother goes through it periodically. She'll feel a bit bloated after a meal and think that she hasn't pooped in days. She won't remember that she had gone the day before and will ask for a laxative. She thinks she needs to go every day like she always used to do. If I do give her a laxative, she takes it, then talks about how my cooking gave her an upset tummy. I'll remind her that she took a laxative. :-)
We have a pretty set routine to try to keep her as regular as possible. She has a dose of generic Miralax in the morning, then a stronger laxative as needed. At one time she was an ExLax addict, sometimes taking a toxic amount. I had to wrestle them away from her and intercept them from the drugstore if she called to have some delivered. She thought I was evil, but I knew she was ruining her system with those laxatives.
It is important to work with them to keep their systems going smoothly. It's one of those areas where we have to use our best judgment and tolerate anger if they disagree with us. I hope that your mother's obsession passes soon... but you will still have to keep your ears (and nose) open for those toilet visits to make sure things are going like they should.
I've worked in healthcare my entire adult life and I have yet to meet an elderly person who was not concerned about their bowels. I even remember my grandma talking about her bowels at the dinner table!
Get a big calendar and begin charting her bowel movements. Ask to check her stool so you can see if it's normal, hard or loose. Show her the over-the-counter medicine you've bought for both constipation and diarrhea. Assure her that between the two of you, "We've got this, mom." If she needs more reassurance, perhaps, "Mom, your mind is playing tricks on you. Let's beat back these fears together. I'm allll over this.
It's possible that, by carefully and seriously listening to her, acknowledging her concerns and impressing on her that you HEAR her fears, she might relax and feel secure.
Marci, is she constipated? If not, then perhaps she's worried about becoming so.
I would address those issues first, and if she's still focused on them, try to redirect her attention to something else. What were her interests before dementia reared its ugly head? Does she like music? It's proven to be relaxing and may in fact be helpful for her.
On the other hand, her mental acuity has been compromised and she isn't going to be able to think clearly all the time.
Contact your local Alzheimer's Assn. and ask if they sponsor the Creating Confident Caregiver's Course in your area. It's very, very helpful and insightful, and you'll also be able to connect to other people locally who are dealing with similar problems.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
We have a pretty set routine to try to keep her as regular as possible. She has a dose of generic Miralax in the morning, then a stronger laxative as needed. At one time she was an ExLax addict, sometimes taking a toxic amount. I had to wrestle them away from her and intercept them from the drugstore if she called to have some delivered. She thought I was evil, but I knew she was ruining her system with those laxatives.
It is important to work with them to keep their systems going smoothly. It's one of those areas where we have to use our best judgment and tolerate anger if they disagree with us. I hope that your mother's obsession passes soon... but you will still have to keep your ears (and nose) open for those toilet visits to make sure things are going like they should.
It's possible that, by carefully and seriously listening to her, acknowledging her concerns and impressing on her that you HEAR her fears, she might relax and feel secure.
I would address those issues first, and if she's still focused on them, try to redirect her attention to something else. What were her interests before dementia reared its ugly head? Does she like music? It's proven to be relaxing and may in fact be helpful for her.
On the other hand, her mental acuity has been compromised and she isn't going to be able to think clearly all the time.
Contact your local Alzheimer's Assn. and ask if they sponsor the Creating Confident Caregiver's Course in your area. It's very, very helpful and insightful, and you'll also be able to connect to other people locally who are dealing with similar problems.