My Mom (92) has confusion/memory issues. Any advice?
Mom's 92 and showing signs of confusion/memory issues. It's progressing slowly but consistently. 2 questions:
1) Should I correct her when she says something incorrectly? For example: she's recently started saying she's 94 - I usually don't correct that unless it's someone who needs to know her actual age (doctor). Other times she'll say something and instead of just giving her the answer I try to get her to figure it out on her own.
2) Most of the time Mom enjoys going places, but doesn't remember where she was immediately afterwards. Is it worth taking her when she doesn't even remember? For example: we went to the Bahamas and as we were coming through the Bahama airport to come home, she told the security person I was taking her to the Bahamas.
As far as the trips, I would continue if she doesn't have any difficulty with them. Many dementia patients get overwhelmed in public, loud or strange places. They may wander or become confused, but if she enjoys it, then I would do what makes her happy in the moment. That's all we really have. Take photos and hang them up so she can see how much fun she is having, if she still recognizes herself.
As for travel, I don't know. It's certainly good to get elders out and about but a trip to the Bahamas that she won't remember, what's the point.....
No....She doesn't remember and is not going to remember. Now poor Mom is confused, sad, and agitated. She would be better off with no visit from this person.
Probably the majority of residents didn't remember the delightful Saturday event by Monday. Does that mean the NH shouldn't have bothered? Persons with dementia often live in the Now. It is all they have. Making the Now as pleasant as it can be is very worthwhile, in my opinion.
People who don't visit because "she won't remember it anyway" and who pass up chances for nice outings for the same reason are missing the point, I think. We are building memories for ourselves, and proving nice moments for our loved ones.
I totally agree with the points made in your last 2 paragraphs. Although I have no scientific proof on which to base it, I fully believe that providing "nice outings", pleasurable activities, etc. stimulate the brain to produce endorphins and make the individual feel better. And when you're old and have some dementia, how can that be bad?
Love the point of living in the now. Something we all need to do - who knows what tomorrow will bring.
Some times some of the things Mom says can be comical after the fact. Oh gosh, I remember driving my parents to and from the doctors, I would go into the exam room with them to hear what the doctor had to say... and after the appointment I would hear my parents chatting in the back seat about the appointment saying things that I know the doctor never said, etc..... it was like weren't we all the same room together???