I do not have POA but am the only daughter so most things fall to me :) Mom is getting more & more confused and has taken to adding & changing cable packages, family phone plans, turning off auto pay, etc. to her AT&T account, Direct TV, etc. Most of these things are included in her rent at the assisted living community already! So when she changes something I call the utility or log in to her account and change things back. Does anyone know if there is some kind of alert or block I can ask these utility companies to put on Mom's account? That she has Alzheimer's and is not allowed to make any changes to her account? Thank you!
I've gotten rid of Mom's credit card and am on her account so feel that is a good step forward. She does call the bank frequently though and order new debit cards, checks, etc. I've set up alerts on the account to let me know when things like that happen or a withdrawal is made. I haven't been able to get the bank to put an alert on her account though to not take these calls from her. It's very time-consuming cleaning this up.
The retirement center holds mom's mail at the front desk for me and picks out just greeting cards, etc. to give to her so that's helped a lot with mom not seeing solicitations from all those charities that she LOVES to give to. So that has curbed.
Now to get aggressive with the phone and cable company as mom has made multiple changes to those accounts just in the last month, ordering packages for equipment she doesn't even have!
Thank you all for just being a place to finally feel like I'm not the only one out there who's dealing with this kind of thing!
Being an only child does not mean that you should not have Durable Power of Attorney. I am acting conservator for my Mother right now until I have my hearing with the Court soon to have the title of Conservator.
If you're using a portal to change this, many are none the wiser. Yes I have had to do the same things myself.
Trying to get bills paid has become something on the line of HIPAA. I get some businesses who don't have an issue helping me.....it's in the verbiage one uses...others will only help if I can prove I have POA.
Yes, use portals if you're able....even though it is basically identity theft, but you got to do what you got to do.
GET DURABLE POA!!
Even when your Mother passes, unless she has a Will, the Estate is intestate and the Court will decide what you get after all creditors are paid first.
Even though you are an "heir" so are any cousins, Aunts, Uncles basically any one who feels that they are an "heir" is some capacity. The Court will determine if they have a true claim or not.
Since Mom has Alzheimer's, you will need to go to Court to have the power that she once had since she is no longer able to understand what she is doing, cannot understand what she is signing etc etc etc.
Good luck and it will not be fun.
I don’t know your experience will be the same but you could try this route with each company, just calling up and explaining the situation and seeing what options they can offer even without proof of POA or guardianship.
When I have helped mother unsnarl issues with catalog companies--she has to be present and able to speak to the representatives and give me verbal OK to act in her behalf. This is extremely frustrating---but I am not and never will be her POA.
Being VERY firm with these companies who so love to prey on the elderly is the best tactic. Just be aware that your LO may turn right around and order from some random catalog (after you've told them off) or give a ton of money to a shady charity.
I am my dad's and all bills come to my address or email. He sees nothing. If no one has POA yet...you are going to have trouble.
chdottir's advice about address and phone changes is also easily done. Glad to hear you are already doing that.
I went further and cut off my Dad's charge card. He didn't need one and everyone then had to go through me if they wanted to be paid. Easy peasy.
I would think an Elder Attorney could help you with this.
Do the bills come to her, and is that a trigger for her to make these changes? The contact info for all my mother's accounts is my phone number and address, so she never sees any bills or such.
Or maybe she is, and ignores them. She wouldn't be able to figure out how to do any of these things, so I don't have that worry.