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Hello I work in a nursing home as a dietary aid and I bring in the food to the old folks. This lady hates her roommate and despises everything she does if I try to help her roommate she accuses me of being in love with her kissing her and getting in bed with her. She even said she’s scared I’ll bring a gun bc I’m violent and how if her roommate was younger I’d get on top of her. I don’t want her spreading rumors about me of doing this or I don’t wanna be in there what can I do?

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Sounds like that lady might have a touch of dementia or other issue making her be so hateful. I'd report it to your boss so it is on record. She is likely accusing anyone around her of similar things.
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Quit or ask to be transferred away from such a toxic situation.
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PeggySue2020 May 2023
I wouldn’t quit. I would report these allegations. It’s pretty common with people with dementia.
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Report it to your supervisor. They'll have seen stuff like this before, and either they'll send someone else in there, or you could request that someone be with you when you go in.
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Not alone. Complained to my wife’s GP that my wife was verbally abusing me. Information was forwarded to a government agency as me being the abuser. Wife with VD complained that I was putting something in her drinks. Report unfounded after material witness were interviewed. She now lectures me up to three hours at a time about what a horrible narcissist I am. I’m in good company because just about everyone she knows is a “narcissist “.
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JoAnn29 May 2023
Time to place your wife and get her on Meds. GPs know a little of everthing and a lot about nothing. Get her to a neurologist.
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Yiu go to the person you report to. The woman probably has Dementia so you need to just let it roll off your back and ignore. I think your supervisor will understand. Just smile and do what your job entails always with a smile. If this type of behaviour really bothers you, maybe your not cut for NH work. I would ask your supervisor if they know of any Dementia/Alxheimers seminars you could attend so you can familiar yourself with the disease.
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The sixth new member of Forum I have addressed this a.m. I am wondering if our site is being advertised on a website or something! Welcome, Shellz. So nice to have a "food aid" on Forum. Do you work in delivery of food, or in the kitchen prep area?

As far as your question about the woman who is saying inappropriate things to you, my suggestion would be, since you ARE an employee, to take this to the person you are directly reporting to. I know that you always recognize that many in your facility have some dementia, and I know you will already be hearing some odd statements, but you should feel free to take what you hear to those in charge. It may affect care plan and placement and level of care numbers for your facility.

As you are uncertain of just what sort of statement is "reportable" do feel free to ask that of your immediate supervisor. They will be glad to give you guidance, I would think.

Best of luck.
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Report it to your supervisor
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Being accused of something you didn't do is so disturbing. Whatever you do report it in writing to create a paper trail. Also, I would request that I'm not left alone with this particular client. Even though she might have cognitive issues sometimes management will take the side of the resident especially if she tells these fabrications to her own family members or her roommate's family. It's important to take this seriously and protect yourself.
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Hopeforhelp22 May 2023
I agree with Morris64 - you need to document and report this to your supervisor for them to take next steps to resolve. Your supervisor should also include the nursing facility's Admin/HR department or person in the process.
This needs to be noted and taken seriously and appropriate measures need to take place in order to be resolved. It's important to share this with your employer so they can take care of this.
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