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My brilliant, beautiful educated son has now developed a very serious mental health disease, schizoaffective disorder. Comorbid conditions are Depression, Anxiety, social isolation. Schizoaffective disease usually manifest itself in an individual when they are in their 20s; this is NOT present in childhood in most cases.


I want to find the right caregiver to help my son manage his medications, doctors & counseling appts, and if he gets argumentative and yells (usually at MOM), Mom needs help calming him down. I need a strong male who will cook nutritious meals, organize and clean his house, keep a calendar schedule for him. He does not need any help with bathroom needs, other than making him get up and shower, and PARTICIPATE IN LIFE. Jordan needs to be either taking classes at the local University or Working part-time; he does have SSI. How do I find the right person to help me; may turn into a live-in situation? My son isolates himself from the world if no one pays attention; I can't let this happen. Jordan is extremely intelligent and knowledgeable, educated (has a Bachelor's Degree form the University of Illinois), AND he NEEDS TO PARTICIPATE IN LIFE. Needs an uplifting positive male to help him---a male life coach.

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This is a forum of people sharing advice about caring for older adults, I don't think this is the place for you. Perhaps you will find support here:

https://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/
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newbiewife Dec 2019
From what I've seen, some of us on this site may be elders caring for or concerned about children or other family members so I think some posters may have helpful suggestions for Ingrid60.
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As you search the site that cwillie gave you...
Looking for a caregiver is a challenge no matter the age of the person that needs care.
This will take some interviewing when you go to an agency. You need to explain what it is you/your son needs. Another option would be to contact your local Community College or the University I am sure they have a CNA or Nursing program. Ask if any of the students are looking for a part time job. Explain to the director of the program what you are looking for and see if a student would be a good option.
When I was caring for my Husband the 2 BEST caregivers I hired were students that had just completed their CNA program and were waiting for the Nursing program to start.
Best of luck in your search.
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You can contact your local division of NAMI or your local Mental Health office. My sister has an intellectual disability but is smart and I functional but will not do things for herself either. Because of the disability and diabetes I got home health care for her as she lives alone but if I didn’t she would be content with tv and video games. I had to let it go. You can’t make anyone do anything they don’t want to and just because they are sick doesn’t mean they won’t have to suffer the consequences. It hurts to watch I know.
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Does your son have a case manager through any kind of mental health or human services agency? If not, you might want to see about getting him one. Those folks can be very helpfu in setting up just the kind of things you are seeking. Supportive housing options for people with mental illness is a good option, as there are apt to be daily interactions with staff and other residents that help prevent isolation.
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I would concentrate on finding someone who, in addition to your other requirements, is experienced in working with people with mental illness and is
a little more seasoned than someone right out of school.

Going through a not-for-profit is a good idea. Just get the word out there. Make tons of calls. Keep track of everyone you speak to so that you will be familiar to them when you have to call back.

You might try the United Way. They're a vast resource of services.

Your son has very specific needs but I hope that as you do your research you will find several people who meet your criteria. They're out there, you just have to find them

Good luck!
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