I am slowly going through my childhood home and packing mom and dads clothes etc and taking them to charity.
My wife wants to keep the house and rent it. The house has not been updated in 40 years so it is dated, at first I was all for renting it since I could then hold on to my childhood home.
I started to figure up how much rent we could get without updating the house and it would take 20+ years of renting it to get what I could just sell it for now that is not even counting anything that would break in the 20+ years of renting it not to mention all the headaches that come from renters that I would have to deal with myself, I handle all the financial stuff.
We do not have any kids or any other family to leave it to so I want to sell it, take the money and invest it for our retirement we are in our early 40s so that would be 20+ years of interest as we already have investments in stocks etc. We also already own a home that is paid for.
I'm sure other people here can relate to going through your mom and dads clothes by yourself packing them up it is not easy, I come across clothes that I remember them wearing it just makes you sick to your stomach.
My wife of 20 years is not being supportive. I am packing up all there stuff on my own in there empty house. I have gotten her over to mom/dads a few times but she just wants to keep everything she just tells me it's strange with them not being here she just kind of shuts down.
I already have someone that wants to buy the house! We have been paying tax, power bills for months on a empty house. I do hate to see it go but I think it's the best choice.
I have to give my wife credit, she did take care of dad a few days at the end. He has been gone for 7 months mom has been gone for 5 years.
Anyone else a only child that can relate?
Thanks for listening/reading this forum is kind.
Good luck.
Here in Canada an inheritance is not divisible in a divorce, unless the asset or funds have been commingled with family funds. In your case, if you keep and rent the house, and the net rent comes general family revenues, you would be commingling the funds.
If you sell the house and keep the funds in a separate investment account, it is not considered to be a family asset in case of divorce.
I am not saying your marriage in jeopardy, but it is important to know the laws where you live.
Next suggestion, please hire one or more helpers to sort through and pack up the house. It will make so much easier for you.
If you decide to rent it out, I want to point out that your math missed an important point. If in 20 years of renting you will earn what you could sell it for today, you have not taken into consideration what you could sell it for in the future.
I am a financial planner and in situations like yours there is value in talking to a fee for service FP to look over the numbers. They do not have to prepare a full financial plan for you, just two scenarios of keep and rent, vs sell and invest.
It sounds like your wife is in deep denial.
You could rent, but the costs, time and effort involved -plus having to be 'on call' as the landlord (do you REALLY want that phone call on Christmas morning or at 2am Thanksgiving when they call you to tell you the furnace doesn't work and the pipes just burst?) It is a lot of work with no guarantee (think back to last year when renters couldn't pay rent, the landlords couldn't evict but the landlords had to keep paying the mortgages, insurance, property taxes, etc).
So, my vote would be to sell the place now (sell high) and get the cash now. Before the economy changes, which is will start doing so in 2022. Will wife be happy - probably not. But if you don't sell now, you won't be happy.
The home is not a person or your parents. It would be a shame not to allow another family the joy of creating wonderful memories in that home.
Translation: You set a schedule for grieving and she has the nerve to exceed it. You want to sell and she dares to disagree … because the stock market is a guaranteed income (lol). No wonder she shuts down.
Maybe you stop talking about what you want and listen to what your wife wants and needs. Then work together instead of pulling the only child so it’s just about me card.
I'm slowly going through things at their house. It too is "vintage/classic". I have decided that renting the place just doesn't add up also. I have reduced energy consumption by unplugging freezer unit and an extra refrigerator. The utility bills are as low as they can go at this point.
My wife and I are trying to decide if we want to move into that house. The 2 houses are about 2 miles apart.
There is certainly a lot of things that have to be sorted through.
I've decided to take my time. I too, have had excellent offers for either one of my places. I'm in no need to hurry, thank God.
The outside areas, especially the front yard has been my big concern. It was a beautiful putting green type of lawn with straight-edged hedges before my Dad got sick. Then we hired out the work. After my Dad passed, my Mom became very critical of things and of all outside help coming in. It was obvious that the front lawn and hedges were never going to be like Dad's were again. I'm just trying to not have the worse front yard on the street right now.
Good luck ... I'll keep an eye out for further updates from you.
We have some decisions to make, don't we. But while we're deciding, let's take the time needed to reflect as we go through things.
Now, do a chart showing how much money you would make [if any] if the house was kept as an "investment" and having tenants. Being a landlord is like having a business. There are profit and losses. Real estate market has it highs and lows, just like the stock market.
For myself, back decades ago I had excellent tenants for my properties, I went through a Realtor. The tenants were vetted, etc. I even allowed pets. As part of their rent, I paid for lawn service.
If your wife wants the house as a rental, is she willing to do the spreadsheets for income and expenses? I hired a CPA to do my income taxes, as it was complex. Is your wife willing to field the calls from the tenants, this is not a 9 to 5 M-F job.
Is she willing to go over to the house to fix things? Ready to wheel and deal for new items the house will need? Does she know any good roofers? Plumbers? Electricians? Is she willing to pay real estate taxes, higher homeowner's insurance/umbrella policy? Purchase new carpet between tenants? Understand in the Lease regarding "normal wear and tear".
Let us know what happens.
Caring for a rental property is a big responsibility and costs more than you think and nets you less than you thought it would. Renters rights are on the rise, landlord rights are on the decline. Getting rid of unwanted tenants is very difficult and very expensive. You do not want that headache. Sell it to somebody who has no emotional stake in the property. They will deal with it better than you could. Every time I have rented out a home I have ended up promising myself that I will never do it again.
Perhaps that house is someone's dream house waiting for a renewal.
Did you know you can get purple heart to come pick up the donated items? If you have a lot, you can call them and they will have a truck and more people will come to load it.
I know it is so hard to deal with. But you are stronger than you know. There are businesses that will come help you clean it out. Not just take it to the dump, but help you sort and do what you want with the items.
My parents were hoarders in the end, so luckily I found a company that helped me. You must be there and supervise. Don't let them go off and work on separate rooms.
I have a sublingual that refused to help at all but wants to control and block everything.
I am really sorry your wife is shutting down. That is not helpful at all. Id have a coming to jesus moment with her, that is not being a good partner. It is so stressful and you need help. It is overwhelming for you not her. I'd remind her of that. But I'd hire help if you can. It will go so much faster that way. Or have a company come in and auction it. Altho I had 2 very bad experiences with that. I didn't go that way, and they are greedy. You can put some items for sale on Facebook marketplace, and offer up. Sold quite a few items on there.
Do not have them meet you at parent's house. I had better luck having them meeting me at entrance to my development. That way if they don't show, you didn't waste an hour loading, driving it to a public place. I had a lot of no shows when I'd meet at public place.
I know there was some days I didn't want to get out of bed. I still don't some days. I went and got Sam- e and that helped a lot.
Kenchanting on here and venting. I feel your pain.
Gold luck.
Accordingly, decisions regarding your inheritance should be yours alone. You need not consult your wife or evaluate the quality of any unsolicited advice she forces on you.
She may think she knows how you feel, or how she believes you feel, but only you know how you feel
The correct answer is not just based on financials, you may want to separate from this past chapter emotionally, in order to achieve your best future.
Do what YOU want and don’t accept anyone else’s input (including advice from strangers on this forum).
That way, in the end, you will only have yourself to thank (or blame) for the decision.
When I cleaned out my parents apartment, I intentionally tried to to donate or give away most of their things. It made me feel good that I was re-purposing their "stuff" and clothing. I kept many things for myself too - but in the end, it's not the stuff but the memories that are always in your heart and life does go on.
My condolences and warmest wishes for a positive outcome.
I say you should give your wife her share if what would need to be done to rent it out and go for it, use it as a rental and if it doesn't work out, you can always sell it.
Realestate is about the best investment you can make.
You can also do a little fixing up a little at a time.
The best real estate investment is one where you buy into a brand new development before the houses are even built. Then hang onto the house for 10-15 years. Then move into that rental property for a couple of years before selling so it becomes a "primary" residence and not an "investment" property. A CPA can explain more.
It is not unusual for someone to purchase a previously owned home near the top of market, only to find themselves trying to sell when the market had corrected itself, only to sell for what they paid for the house. That happened to me.
Keeping the house is a viable plan if your market research says rentals in that area are going for a lot. If you use the equity loan to fix and rent it, that could be the best investment ever. People always need a place to live but the stock market is fickle. Ask yourself whether your monthly return on the purchase of stocks would be more than your return on a rental. Also, which one has the greater risk of loss? In many places, people pay more in rent than it would cost to pay a mortgage and taxes and insurance. If you are renting yourself, you might move in to the house and fix it up and save your rent money. If you own, you might rent your house and move into your parents for a year or so and fix it up.
For a relatively small fee you can hire a management company to deal with the tenants so you don’t have to. Owning rental property gives you additional tax deductions and it’s an asset you can borrow against in the future if you need to, possibly even to buy another house.
I know it’s a hard decision but you are young and you need to think about your financial future. Your wife has a valid point and you should seriously investigate your options before you rush to sell. You might regret it later. Best wishes.
Make sure you get the home appraised before you sell the home to the interested party.
Family members wanted to buy the house for about 30 seconds until I said, " I am here to help my parents. You'll have to pay market price. It's not negotiable."
So i do feel like i am being rushed. In a way it's good because it is motivation to push through.