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Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My father has been abusive towards me all my life. It’s done intentionally. Your mother might be the same.
I try several strategies: (a) remembering that my father does this as a control technique, projection…(b) I try to have so much self-esteem that no one can tear me down. (c) I remember: it’s a lie what he says. It’s not my fault.
Your mother is only 69, and you have years ahead to face how to deal with this.
First question is whether mother has always been like this, it’s just ‘more so’ now. 'More so' is often the case with long term difficult parents, and with many dementia sufferers (and the carers who suffer with them). It’s also true for many older people who get the idea that because they are old, they are now the boss and are entitled to whatever they want. Elders like this don’t like to hear ‘no’. However you do have some chance that boundaries will work. The mantra is ‘this is what it takes if you want to live here with me’, followed by ‘if that’s not OK with you, we will need to look at another form of care’.
If your mother has never been like this before, and it’s a symptom of one of the many dementia issues, your chances of getting her to face boundaries are less. In that case you need to plan for the future, which will eventually need facility care. There are many threads to help you if you click on Care Topics at the top RHS of the screen. You may be able to cope for quite a lot longer, but the advice is often that people do better if they are moved to facility care (Senior Living, Assisted Living, Nursing Home, Memory Care) early enough to adjust and feel at home there.
There are many detailed threads on ‘Care Topics’ which will give you other people’s experience, and something to chew over while you work out how to approach this.
From another post: "Does anyone know how to navigate researching and finding financial assistance for finding an assisted living facility for an aging and unhappy parent? I am only 31, am a full time teacher, am an only child trying to figure this all out."
Looks like you are already considering facility placement for your mother. Tell us more. What is her financial situation? Could she qualify for Medicaid?
What kind of help do you provide for her now? Does she live with you, or vice-versa? If not, how far away is she?
Graves desease is serious and I hope she is seeing an Endocrinologist. Graves effects the Thyroid and my Moms doctor discribed it as, eats away the Thyroid. Thank God medication helped my Mom. I forget the med my Mom took but you can't take cholesterol medication with it because both damage the liver.
"People may experience: Whole body: excess sweating, fatigue, heat intolerance, or high blood pressure Heart: fast heart rate, irregular heart rate, or palpitations Mood: anxiety or nervousness Eyes: abnormal protrusion of eyes or puffy eyes Also common: absence of menstruation, diarrhea, enlarged thyroid, hair loss, hand tremor, insomnia, irritability, muscle weakness, puffy skin changes on the shin, or weight loss"
The Thyroid gives off hormones. When it doesn't work right, there can be lots of problems as u can see by the symptoms above. You can see why Mom would be moody.
Again, if she is not going to an Endocrinologist, she should be.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Mood swings and rudeness can be symptoms depression, anxiety, agitation or other conditions that may be treatable with the appropriate meds.
I try several strategies: (a) remembering that my father does this as a control technique, projection…(b) I try to have so much self-esteem that no one can tear me down. (c) I remember: it’s a lie what he says. It’s not my fault.
First question is whether mother has always been like this, it’s just ‘more so’ now. 'More so' is often the case with long term difficult parents, and with many dementia sufferers (and the carers who suffer with them). It’s also true for many older people who get the idea that because they are old, they are now the boss and are entitled to whatever they want. Elders like this don’t like to hear ‘no’. However you do have some chance that boundaries will work. The mantra is ‘this is what it takes if you want to live here with me’, followed by ‘if that’s not OK with you, we will need to look at another form of care’.
If your mother has never been like this before, and it’s a symptom of one of the many dementia issues, your chances of getting her to face boundaries are less. In that case you need to plan for the future, which will eventually need facility care. There are many threads to help you if you click on Care Topics at the top RHS of the screen. You may be able to cope for quite a lot longer, but the advice is often that people do better if they are moved to facility care (Senior Living, Assisted Living, Nursing Home, Memory Care) early enough to adjust and feel at home there.
There are many detailed threads on ‘Care Topics’ which will give you other people’s experience, and something to chew over while you work out how to approach this.
Looks like you are already considering facility placement for your mother. Tell us more. What is her financial situation? Could she qualify for Medicaid?
What kind of help do you provide for her now? Does she live with you, or vice-versa? If not, how far away is she?
Do you have POA/HCPOA?
"People may experience:
Whole body: excess sweating, fatigue, heat intolerance, or high blood pressure
Heart: fast heart rate, irregular heart rate, or palpitations
Mood: anxiety or nervousness
Eyes: abnormal protrusion of eyes or puffy eyes
Also common: absence of menstruation, diarrhea, enlarged thyroid, hair loss, hand tremor, insomnia, irritability, muscle weakness, puffy skin changes on the shin, or weight loss"
The Thyroid gives off hormones. When it doesn't work right, there can be lots of problems as u can see by the symptoms above. You can see why Mom would be moody.
Again, if she is not going to an Endocrinologist, she should be.