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How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My mom complains about everyone, which is not good for me to hear. I have been driven to start overdosing. It does nothing, I get a few side effects. I just can't take it. I don't know how to keep putting up with this anymore.
This sounds like a very difficult situation and it sounds as though she is beyond reasoning with. All you can do to stay sane in the situation is to just say "yes Mom"... See a doctor/counsellor for your own sanity and wellbeing.
Get an Ipod and wear it - turn it on and tell her 'oh sorry - can't hear a thing you're saying.' And keep those ear phones on whenever she starts. I know exactly what you are dealing with and it gets so tiresome.
Ashley you are in a serious and dangerous situation. Seek immediate help through a suicide hot line. You are at the end of your rope. Dealing with Mom's negativity can wait for another day. You need the help today, NOW. Pick up the phone and call 911 if you have to. overdosing is not to be trifled with and soe drugs will cause permanent damage to your body assuming you survive.
Did you know that if you text 741741 when you are feeling depressed or suicidal, a crisis worker will TEXT with you? Many people don't like talking on the phone and would feel more comfortable texting. It's a free service run by The Crisis Text Hotline. Please let us know how you're doing. And please tell us more about your situation. Does mom live with you? How old is she and what is her/your situation? Do you have siblings or family nearby? Does mom live at your house or do you live at hers? Information like that will help us give you better answers. {{{Hugs}}} We're here for you.
I’m new here. I don’t know what the answer is, but I sure can relate to what you’re listening to. My mother, 96, still living alone in a senior apartment home (not assisted) is the same way. She always HAS been like this, and it’s only exaggerated now that she’s slipping into dementia. She makes up stories about everyone. The nice woman who moved in next door to her gave my mother her phone number in case she ever needs help, told her to knock on the wall if she can’t get to the phone, etc. Yet, because she wore one pair of shorts that my mother thought was too short, and one dress that was too tight, my mother is convinced the woman is a prostitute! She also hates the nice woman from down the hall and the one upstairs who check on her well being often because one “knows it all” and the other “talks too much.” There’s a lovely woman who is “too loud” and she thinks another is crank calling her (it’s probably telemarketers). It’s not as easy as people seem to think it is to just say, “I don’t want to hear it!” I tried that and Mom had a fit, got mad, started yelling at me, dredging up stuff from my childhood! It was ridiculous. She is old, has a little bit of dementia, and is scared, but she doesn’t see herself as mean, nasty, obnoxious, cruel, etc. She just plain does not see it. There is nothing wrong with her. So, I got myself a therapist and it has helped. He has helped me to understand that she is a control freak and feels out of control now, that she feels less and less like she “fits in,” and she’s very scared when things happen like she can’t find the coffee, her keys, etc. Therapy does help!
What are your mother's impairments that she is living with you? There are things that can be done. If she doesn't have dementia or Alzhiemer's, when she starts up with the yelling, let her know that if she wants to stay where she is, she is going to have to shut up. No complaining, she can't be critical, no yelling. She must be polite and nice, you can tell her that she might be old but it doesn't give her a pass to be hateful and complaining. But not matter what, you have the option of moving her out of your house.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Dealing with Mom's negativity can wait for another day.
You need the help today, NOW.
Pick up the phone and call 911 if you have to. overdosing is not to be trifled with and soe drugs will cause permanent damage to your body assuming you survive.
Can you explain to the caregivers what you mean by overdosing?
Can you just step outside when your Mom starts up? Walk away saying "I don't want to hear it!".
Her brain is broken, and fixated on very negative things. Sorry that you are dealing with this. It may help to vent here, keep talking.