I find that nostalgic mentions of my father who passed from Covid seem to irritate my mother. In addition, I find myself arguing with my mother over minor things, just because she is wrong about something, like the location of a restaurant. I don't mean to do it, but at a certain point, I'm just annoyed. My father was a strong, aggressive presence in their relationship - he would argue minor issues. I find myself doing the same. I don't want to do that to her. (I should also mention that my father got sick with Covid, we suffered through quarantine and we are both traumatized by it. We did not get to be with him when he died.)
Although I don't have any advice/suggestions for you, I'm so sorry that your father passed away from COVID and that you and your mom didn't get to be with him when he died - that is truly heartbreaking and I know how you both would feel traumatized by it.
I personally, had to take an anti-anxiety medication which has helped me a lot in keeping me calm when unexpected issues arise.
Please accept my heartfelt condolences to you both and may God give you a sense of peace as you grieve your loss.
Are you and your mother living together?
I'm so sorry for your loss, and for how it happened.
I know where you are coming from. My DH is like ur father. And instead of just letting it go, I have to argue. Like with my grandson, should have just let it go. Been married almost 40 yrs, think I would have learned. I just keep asking myself "to let it go not important". Does her saying the wrong location of a restaurant between u two really hurt things. No. Now if she is giving someone directions, you may nicely say "No thats Franks, Bobs is on 1st street. If she argues, let it go. The person should have a GPS.
I also think you both should get grief counseling. Some Churches offer it. I would think with this whole C19 thing there should be groups getting together as this hopefully dies down. You and Mom didn't have closure. There is probably some misplaced guilt. Five stages if grief are:
Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance
I might have told her nicely *once*. Repeatedly? - my a&&.
Make a formal complaint. Either the woman is a moron or the process she was using needs to be corrected immediately, before anyone else recently bereaved gets interrogated.
How dare she. I'm outraged on your behalf.