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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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She is in a senior housing retirement home has own apartment refuses to do above. What more to add she need shower/sponge bath and to change clothes but refuses...
I am beginning to understand that the loss of the desire to bathe is what elders do when they are nearing death. It happened with my father during his last 3 or 4 years. Now it is happening with my mother. My mother says it is because her skin is dry and that showering makes it worse. I do not think this is the honest answer, since she has showered religiously for years. I think it is more because she doesn't have the energy to want to do it anymore. So far I've been able to get her to bathe 2 or 3 times a week by mentioning that she doesn't want to get infection. We do know that keeping clean is important for women in preventing UTIs. I know there will come a time when this will no longer work.
I go over once a week to get my mom showered. It takes about 35 minutes to get her showered and in clean clothes and her hair set. She just doesn't have the initiative or energy to do it on her own. Before I'd started helping her, she'd say she would do it and just wouldn't. She'll be 95 next month.
I don't think she'd want anyone else helping her, as I had to fight to get her to allow aids to come in and give her the meds she takes daily. So personal weekly intervention is what has worked for my mom and me. Good luck, it's not easy for anyone.
Bribery can work. Say "mom if you shower in the morning, we'll go out for a nice lunch and drive". "Would you like me to come over early to give you a little help?".
You could also help her if she just doesn't have strength by saying "hey mom, I just learned something new from my friend, Susan...will you help me practice?" Then bring a big bath sheet that you've wet in warm water or hot out of the dryer and drape that over her in the shower for privacy...then gently wash one body part at a time, moving bath sheet to expose parts, then re-covering as you go along. Hair wash last. Have another dry bath sheet ready when she comes out.
Refusing to bath was one of the first signs of dementia in my cousin. I couldn't figure it out. She would literally cry if I explained she had to bath before going to see a doctor. She would also resist brushing her teeth and wearing a bra. I thought she was being difficult or quirky, but it grew and the dementia eventually became very evident.
It may not be dementia with your mom, but I would just consider that as you help care for her.
Oh, I forgot to add that I didn't have much luck with convincing my cousin to bath. I didn't know it was dementia, so I made very improper comments. I told her that if she didn't bath or wear a bra, people would think she was crazy. She told me she didn't care.
Know what you mean, Sunny. I gave up on the social aspects of bathing for my mother. She will bathe on Saturday night without prompting so we can go to church on Sunday. If I mention a bath at other times of the week and mention being around others, she'll say she doesn't care since she isn't going to see anyone anyway. That is why I changed to the personal health angle.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I don't think she'd want anyone else helping her, as I had to fight to get her to allow aids to come in and give her the meds she takes daily. So personal weekly intervention is what has worked for my mom and me. Good luck, it's not easy for anyone.
You could also help her if she just doesn't have strength by saying "hey mom, I just learned something new from my friend, Susan...will you help me practice?" Then bring a big bath sheet that you've wet in warm water or hot out of the dryer and drape that over her in the shower for privacy...then gently wash one body part at a time, moving bath sheet to expose parts, then re-covering as you go along. Hair wash last. Have another dry bath sheet ready when she comes out.
Good luck.
It may not be dementia with your mom, but I would just consider that as you help care for her.