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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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If you're parents are still of sound mind, then I don't know what you can do to stop the 'bad sibling from preying on them'. If on the other hand they are starting to slip brain wise, then putting someone in charge of their finances (POA) is in order. If this has been the status-quot between your parents, and the one kid that is the moocher, then good luck trying to change that dynamic.
Ask your parents if they have a will, if so ask to see it (often durable POA is assigned when they draw up a will, I didn't know I was POA until I saw the documents attached to the will), if no POA is assigned convince them their will needs updated and have POA added. I also was added to my Mom's bank account, and from reading these threads it may very by where you live, but I took the POA document into the bank and told them I wanted to put mom's money in a CD which I was able to do without her signature, and that's how I keep the majority of her money from being spent. I also monitor her account online. I don't know how your parents are mentally, but my Mom can no longer do basic math and needed someone to step in and take care of finances. I pay her bills and just give her some cash to carry around for going out to eat and sundry items. It seems there's always one sibling in the family who manipulates and takes advantage, since mom thinks she has to help her kids (I know I do a lot for my kids as well), all I can do is try to minimize the damage. Good Luck!
I cant say that this is recommended but is quite funny. A friend of mine was having the same problem and his parents had money put away but told the moocher that their money was becoming really tight. One day the moocher came and wanted some money and guess what...dad wrote a check. My friend always kept track of the checkbook so he knew how much was in there....well, he let the check bounce!!!!! Well, buy the time the sibling had to pay for his own bounced checks and was told that the money just isnt there any more....the moocher hasnt asked for anything again...so far.
Get on your parents account as a joint account and get the financial POA. That is what I did. I kept mom pretty involved in the financial decisions until she no longer could make them and I was free to do it myself. Worked for me. I had a disaster on my hands too, but I was able to get it resolved and stopped my low life alcoholic brother from taking her money and using my deceased father's credit card (they have the same name).
Thank you everyone for your helpful comments. My mom thinks she is 20 so I doubt she would give me POA. I am afraid of the thief who lives next door, rent free, thanks to my real estate brother,
Your mother does not sound that she is competent to conduct her business in a business like manner. Thus, without a POA, the only other alternative is guardianship to protect her.
You can also get a vulnerable adult protection order. My sister is a drug addict and I may have to do the same if she tries to contact my father for drug money again.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I don't know how your parents are mentally, but my Mom can no longer do basic math and needed someone to step in and take care of finances. I pay her bills and just give her some cash to carry around for going out to eat and sundry items.
It seems there's always one sibling in the family who manipulates and takes advantage, since mom thinks she has to help her kids (I know I do a lot for my kids as well), all I can do is try to minimize the damage. Good Luck!