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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Sadly, humming will probably not stop until the part of her brain that allows that action no longer functions. She has no control over it. It's a tick.
You'll have to get creative to find ways to distract yourself. You will have to explain to her friends this is part of life with dementia, and their visits are so good for her. Please don't stop visiting over this.
It's these kinds of things that make dementia care so difficult, so you really do have all our sympathies.
My Mom in law whisper/whistles all day long, it drives me crazy. I just count to 10. @sandwich42plus is right, it's not going to go away until it does. And it will as she progresses. It does help sometimes to put on classical music, but any other kind she tries to whistle along and it's worse!!
My MIL hums all day too. She had her brother to stay and he does it as well. When he left she said, "I love him to bits but he drove me nuts with his humming." Bless her, we nearly choked trying not to laugh, she has no idea.
I like the idea of giving her something to suck, I will try mints or pastilles. My Mum does't hum but she will be getting a packet as well.
Lucyboo, you/autocorrect gave me the best laugh I've had in ages.
i would say be careful with the gum that they don't accidentally swallow or choke. and to the "shock collar" person........really? how inconsiderate and rude. i know you meant it sarcastically but really no comment would have been better. good luck.
Is humming always dementia, or could it possibly be from being alone too much? My Aunt does this when I take her shopping each week. I've got to confess a terrible habit. I took care of my Mom until she passed. The last few years, she really wasn't mentally there. So I started talking to myself. I didn't know about this forum at the time. She passed about 9 months ago, and I still find myself doing it. I'm just starting to become social again. Hopefully it will pass. I hope.
How can someone's humming cause them not to visit? If they are truly friends, they won't stop coming and maybe they can join in with her humming. Humming is a way of soothing oneself. Wolflover451 - it is not GUM, it is hum...
I like all these suggestions (the serious ones, anyway...), but the ones I find the kindest are those that suggest you just find a way to tolerate it - for yourself and your mother's friends. When my dad hummed in his last years, it always seemed like a self-comforting behavior to me - and thus not something to be discouraged.
My Mom reads the closed caption in a whisper. But went she does making a smacking sound. Like she isn't opening her lips enough. It drives me nuts.It probably helps her understand what is happening. She is hard of hearing and won't wear her aides. Long story.
Do you think that constant nonsensical chatter all day may be more stressful than humming? And the fidgeting never stops. You gotta have a tremendous amount of patience.. But you gotta love your mom..
Oh the negativity is almost always the theme.. How does one turn that into positive. I smile and try to change the subject, that usually doesn't work. I feel I am doing something wrong..
I don't think humming is that big of an problem... If she has music in her head, consider that a good thing. Maybe play a radio softly in the background so she has something to hum along with. I hum all the time and I'm not even aware of it - I just always have music in my head. Makes me happy. Let your mum be happy.
Take this opportunity to ask her, what is that tune? Can we sing it out loud? Or, Humming, lip smacking, fidegeting can all be signs of anxiety; a side effect of medication that can be changed; or something else the doctor can address.
Elle52 have NO fear of talking to Yourself, as I do it too. It's what I call thinking out loud. I'm pretty sure many People do as well. I'm certain that I talk to Myself out of loneliness, as I live alone with My Por Mom Who's at stage 6 Alzheimer's, and I'm a full time Carer to Mom. I have not come across humming yet, but isn't that what some People do when They are feeling happy ? My own Mother wears false teeth top, and bottom, and very often rattles them, which churns My stomach and gives My a sick feeling, but I would never draw attension to this, as it's probably just a passing thing.
Sendme2help I think thats good sometimes, but with my mil and with the questioner, when it's constant and you have to run a home for your family as well as caregiver it can be unnerving. I just had an aha! moment with your comment about the anxiety thing. Sometimes I have noticed she starts whistling when she thinks she has said something dumb or has asked a dumb question. I will try to be more patient and kinder when she does. Thanks. :)
I, myself, you to have a "tic," that would drive others crazy. It developed overva period of time, especially when I would be caring for my elderly mother. I finally was able to stop the little quirks such little ughs, hum, et al.
I hum when I'm happy! I try not to do it when people are around because I know I look nuts when I do it. I found myself singing (very very quietly) in the grocery store because they were playing 80s music that I used to listen to as a teenager and it was just cool! All they needed was fog and some strobe lights. :-D
People hum for all kinds of reasons. Dementia humming or verbalization like humming is a tick or a stim (when autistic kids do it). Sometimes anti-anxiety meds can help with it. It's not musical humming to a tune but just a very repetitive almost monotone noise.
It's not the same thing as humming a song to yourself because you've gotten used to being by yourself or that great showtune is on in the store muzak. :-)
Humming is a sort of stimulation for sensory system, it is soothing to them, some people will tap their foot, rock themselves, walk, or another sort of self stimulation. This is due to their brain no longer making full sense of what is coming in, via their eyes, ears, and body, There are some great ideas here. I think that the key is to do what helps the caregiver not focus on this, be it white noise, music. it will pass.
jtomalley, I always have music in my head, too. Sometimes it drives me batty, because it is anxiety, I'm sure. And yes, I hum and sing. I'm particularly bad when I am cooking dinner. I've tried to listen to music when I'm cooking, but it makes cooking hard for me.
My mother could have written this message. My daughter is always humming. How can I get her to stop? :)
Sandwich42plus (interesting moniker), I'm glad you piped in about singing in the stores because I do it too when they finally play something I recognize from my youth. Sometimes I find myself swaying to it (if I'm alone in the aisle). Once they were running an advertisement in the background and the announcer asked, "Are you ready?" I was just thinking about leaving the store, so I answered out-loud to myself "I guess so" and a man nearby chuckled and smiled at me. Guess he was semi-consciously listening, too. I smiled back; we both got the joke. When I find myself irritated by little things like someone humming or a neighbor who whistles all the time, I remind myself how bad things could really be and I count my blessings.
Oh my goodness, I was just thinking of researching the sound my mother makes with mouth after eating anything. Not lip smacking but like she has something in her teeth she's trying to jar loose. Can't accurately describe it but it is driving me nuts. I offer a toothpick but it's an hour later before it stops. Kind of weird how the smallest thing become such an irritate. Trying to enter a meditative state for myself when this happens so I don't blow up over something so silly. Thanks for opening up the conversation so again, I can realize I'm not alone in this journey.
My mom went through a period of making noises by blowing or sucking on her tongue. We gave her ring-pops (like pacifier suckers) which calmed her a lot. We have since changed to TootsieRoll Pops. I never have liked nervous tapping, clicking or smacking noises. Maybe I am the one who needs the anti-anxiety meds!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You'll have to get creative to find ways to distract yourself. You will have to explain to her friends this is part of life with dementia, and their visits are so good for her. Please don't stop visiting over this.
It's these kinds of things that make dementia care so difficult, so you really do have all our sympathies.
Try it, gives her jaw something else to automatically do and its hard to chew with gum in your mouth.
Good luck
** hard to HUM with GUM in your mouth!
When he left she said, "I love him to bits but he drove me nuts with his humming."
Bless her, we nearly choked trying not to laugh, she has no idea.
I like the idea of giving her something to suck, I will try mints or pastilles. My Mum does't hum but she will be getting a packet as well.
Lucyboo, you/autocorrect gave me the best laugh I've had in ages.
But you gotta love your mom..
I smile and try to change the subject, that usually doesn't work. I feel I am doing something wrong..
Or,
Humming, lip smacking, fidegeting can all be signs of anxiety; a side effect of medication that can be changed; or something else the doctor can address.
I have not come across humming yet, but isn't that what some People do when They are feeling happy ?
My own Mother wears false teeth top, and bottom, and very often rattles them, which churns My stomach and gives My a sick feeling, but I would never draw attension to this, as it's probably just a passing thing.
I found myself singing (very very quietly) in the grocery store because they were playing 80s music that I used to listen to as a teenager and it was just cool! All they needed was fog and some strobe lights. :-D
People hum for all kinds of reasons. Dementia humming or verbalization like humming is a tick or a stim (when autistic kids do it). Sometimes anti-anxiety meds can help with it. It's not musical humming to a tune but just a very repetitive almost monotone noise.
It's not the same thing as humming a song to yourself because you've gotten used to being by yourself or that great showtune is on in the store muzak. :-)
My mother could have written this message. My daughter is always humming. How can I get her to stop? :)
I never have liked nervous tapping, clicking or smacking noises. Maybe I am the one who needs the anti-anxiety meds!