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My mom is 100. She can not walk nor stand. She is totally bedridden. I am the lone caregiver now since 2008. She quit walking in 2000.
She gets confused during the night and thinks she can get up and walk to the bathroom. I have side rails on the bed, but her tempur pedic bed has not headboard or footboard, so she crawls to end of bed to try and get out. Are there any suggestions how to keep her in bed. I am so tired and weak from rearranging all the furniture around the bed to keep her safe. And do not desire a bed alarm. We both just need to sleep.

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Is mom in a Hospital bed? If so once she is in bed lower it all the way down.
This makes it safer if she does manage to get out of bed but it also makes it more difficult for her to get up.
Most often when this is done another mattress is placed on the floor next to the bed where the person will get out. That further cushions the area and again makes it difficult to get up.

Have you tried putting bolsters under the sheet sort of making a "nest" that she is in. It is difficult to get over the bolsters to the side of the bed.

Looking at your post again it sounds like she does not have a Hospital bed. I would switch to a hospital bed.
The ability to raise and lower the bed makes caring for someone so much easier.
You can raise the bed to change her, change the bedding and lower it so it is easier to get her into bed and lower it yet again to make it safer as I mentioned above.
And there would be a head and foot board.
And in addition a proper mattress that can help prevent pressure sores. If you ever wish to swap out the pattress she has. And I am sure her current mattress would fit the hospital bed.
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I would be concerned with someone as active as her attempting to get over, around or through any kind of barrier system and causing herself a terrible injury. While hospital beds do lower somewhat they are not the same as the specialty beds that lower almost to the floor, and unfortunately those are expensive. Are you willing to try medications to help with sleep?
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Bigger issue what kind of" life" is she having being totally
bedbound?
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Geaton777 Aug 2023
So Cover, what are you implying with your inane question? Why don't you provide an actual useful suggestion?
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Restraints. looks for brands humane restraints and segufix restraints. Strap her down in the bed and it will keep her in place. They are actually quite comfy. My husband and myself have even made use of them for fun time (after gramma passed) if you know what I mean… also my daughter has used them on her nonverbal son to keep him in bed. Mom may resist a little at first but once it’s part of the night time routine it will go smooth. Gramma eventually found them comforting and couldn’t sleep without her “bed seatbelt” as she called them.
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LoopyLoo Aug 2023
Well that was TMI. Yeesh.
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Bed ridden for 20 plus years. I am surprised she made it to 100 what with the potential for blood clots and bed sores from being in bed that long.

I know in facilities restraints are not allowed and it seems inhumane to tie mom to the bed.

Plus could her struggling against said restraints cause bone breakage, etc on someone 100 years old? I can see you being charged with elder abuse if that happens.

What a night mare to live that long trapped in bed and now to be tied up in bed like a prisoner sounds like an even worse nightmare.

There really don't sound like there are any really good solutions for mom at this point. Even medications to keep her in bed sound cruel too.

The only option would be to place her in a facility so you can finally get some sleep.
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Geaton777 Aug 2023
If any kind of medical or social worker or hired aid saw restraints in the LOs bedroom, they would likely get reported.
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No suggestions except it is time to place her in a facility, seems like you have dedicated a large portion of your life to her, might be time to start living yours.
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olddude Aug 2023
A few shots of Jack Daniels may help. For both of you.
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https://www.amazon.com/Elderly%EF%BC%8CMedical-Restraint%EF%BC%8CAnti-Fall-Elderly%EF%BC%8CAdjustable-Wheelchair-Comfortable/dp/B0C23DJ4F5/ref=sr_1_47?crid=1WX9YNSCW0FYE&keywords=Medical%2Bdevice%2Bto%2Bkeep%2Ba%2Bperson%2Bin%2Bbed&qid=1693160832&sprefix=medical%2Bdevice%2Bto%2Bkeep%2Ba%2Bperson%2Bin%2Bbed%2Caps%2C169&sr=8-47&th=1

Above is a link to a bed restraint strap from Amazon. I'm not recommending it nor do I have firsthand experience with one, but it may keep your mom in bed.

Good luck to you
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- purchase a concave mattress, which makes it more difficult to get out of.
- use other mattresses to block her in on 3 sides (or use a wall for one of the sides).
- put her mattress directly on the floor.

My 100-year old Aunt (with mod/adv dementia) who couldn't walk unassisted crawled out of bed in January, fell and broke her hip. We had all sorts of baffles set up to try to prevent this, but she was still pretty strong and very determined. While in rehab she kept attempting to get out of bed. She passed while in rehab, not sure why... possibly from a clot since we didn't move forward with surgery for a partial replacement.

Just know that there is only so much you can do.
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sp196902 Aug 2023
...
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If her doctor orders it, you can get a Hospital bed thru Medicare. That way you will have a head and footboard.
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