Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Contact your state housing authority to see if there is subsidized housing for your mother. In most states there are programs to help pay all or part of monthly rent for disabled or poor seniors. Once she becomes too ill, medicaide - or what ever it's called in your state - will kick in. Do not feel guilty because you don't want to move your mother in with you. If she embellishes her disability now as she ages it will ONLY GET WORSE. You'll end up doing everything for her and then you'll resent it and feel even more guilt at that. My first rule of parent care is DO NOT GIVE UP YOUR ESTABLISHED FUTURE FOR THEIRS. If you do give her money, never put it into her checking or savings accounts, the state will consider that income and she might loose benefits. Give cash directly to her or take her shopping or pay a bill. It's hard to watch your mother struggle financially since she's the source of your being BUT striking a balance between helping her remain comfortable and sacrificing yourself is possible. You just have to find it for your own situation. And, don't let ANYONE make you feel like you're ungrateful because you can't have mom live with you. I'm a high strung perfectionist at heart (but working on it) which causes my mom stress. I'm a much better daughter to her because she does not live with me and she has exposure to others who are caring, supportive and give her outside interests.
Your Mom will not be out on the street if she is poor and really has no assests she will qualify for medicaide you will need to see an elder lawyer who will be able to assist her with the paperwork-do not take on that job yourself she needs to take responsibly for her self and the job is overwhelmimg she probably has social security and maybe a pension esp. if she lives on her own now-you have to think of yourself and your husband -how would you feel if it was your MIL. Mine wanted to live with us and since her object had been to break us up for all our married life I did not allow it and when we almost moved across the country for his job he asked her to move with us before he talked to me about it-we did not move for that reason. She lived very well on her own until she had to be placed and then had to spend down her money until she qualified for medicaide and I did not feel guility she had been so mean to me for so long.
As some of my clients say, you are "fantabulous." And as my Dad used say "Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime." It's a great way to keep from being emotionally blackmailed by those closest to your heart. Barring a severe physical and mental condition, it also affords these individuals the opportunity to develop lifeskills that will allow them to fend for themselves at any age; and allow those you deeply care about them to hang on to health, wits ... and loving husbands.
Thank you, I appreciate your help. At one point, I took her to a lawyer to see if he could help her with a disability case, but he couldn't help because she didn't have permanent housing. I give my mother money every 2 weeks for food and necessities and would like to offer my house to her when the time comes, but am not sure that is best for me and my husband. My husband is very flexible and caring, but having a mother who is probably capable of doing some type of job, would be too much for him to handle as he would constantly get frustrated at her sitting around the house claiming she can do this or that because of this reason or that reason. See, my mother has true medical problems, but some of her complaints are embellished. I have been enabling this behavior, because she is the sweetest woman alive and calling her out gets her upset. I guess I just don't want my mother to end up on the streets - she is not physically or mentally strong enough for that kind of stress and desperation, but at the same time, I am not sure if I am strong enough mentally to deal with her living with me and disrupting my life. I appreciate your advice, I will research my state and prepare myself. Thanks for the luck, I will need it and much more...
If this will wreck your marriage, you can't do it. Help your mother by getting her on Medicaid and looking for senior housing that is subsidized. Go to your state's Web site and look for help under aging services.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
As some of my clients say, you are "fantabulous." And as my Dad used say "Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a lifetime." It's a great way to keep from being emotionally blackmailed by those closest to your heart. Barring a severe physical and mental condition, it also affords these individuals the opportunity to develop lifeskills that will allow them to fend for themselves at any age; and allow those you deeply care about them to hang on to health, wits ... and loving husbands.
Good luck. These are hard decisions.
Carol