I am taking care of my mother with dementia and I have DPOA but not yet guardianship. I'm reading I can't gift myself money, but able to gift my sister, who doesn't even help me out? My mother has always given each of us cash for Christmas so we can buy gifts for the grandchildren. Please don't tell me to ask an attorney, I can't afford him. Thank you for any suggestions.
In reply to this above,
What I find strange about this forum is the people giving the answers.I'm not understanding why people here gives answers in codes.Seem's their affraid to speak the truth giving a answer.Seem's they will HINT but,wont speek out and say the truth.Like this example here,(write checks in g'childrens names for a set amount)Must be a Hint your trying to give this OP?
To graciesgirl,
I'm in the same boat you are as Durable POA.I found so far being a POA that this POA seem's to be worthless in order to get anything done.It's stopping you and me from getting paid for our services we do for our love one.At Christmas time I was force to refuse a Christmas gift from my love one I'm taking care of because,I'm her POA.
I think I found the simple answer for both of us....
Have our DPOA removed.And just become "Joint" on their bank account.Problem solved!
If you did what I allready did as gave the doctor a copy of the DPOA?That means their doctor now has their Living Will information.That means that this DPOA is no longer needed.
Should we have our DPOA removed?
I drove myself crazy with this question for about a year and I am still not comfortable with it but I am hoping my mother never needs Medicaid so I have nothing to be penalized on. I make sure everything is transparent so no sibling has a question as to where money is going and have actually had them sign on to the accounts as well.
As DPOA it is maddening to know that you handle basically everything (I am 24/7 caregiver as well) and yet you are left out in the cold monetarily. I did not begin this for money, but not that I do not receive child support to take care of us, I could really use a bit of income to help myself and my daughter, disability is so low that I could qualify for welfare!!!!
If you are talking about something other than a nominal gift, sorry, although you MORE than deserve it, as the steward of the funds it would be inappropriate.
AGAIN.....I do hope the family recognizes you as generously as they can.
Don't be tempted not to continue your mother's practice of giving your sister money. Although you have my full permission to think "rhubarb rhubarb mutter grumble humph" about it.
When you send her the money, you could - depends on how things are between you - send her your own routine allowance and tell her what to get you?!
Goodness life does get complicated, and especially for people who really are trying to keep to the rules! Sigh...
Our family discussed this issue last Christmas and I had them put in writing (&sign) that we all agreed my mother in law would spend the same amount she did last year on everyone.