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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Koleen, my Mom's doctor had also ordered 24/7 care and she didn't want any part of it. We tried for 3 days having 3 shifts of caregivers help out but Mom became user unfriendly, and would snip at my Dad over this subject.
What would be the consequences? It depends on what are your Dad's medical issue. I didn't see anything mentioned in your profile, so you will need to provide that information to help us give you the right answer.
For my Mom, her major health issue was falling. Sure enough a few days later she had a very serious fall, 911 was called, eventually Mom left the hospital to go to rehab, and she spent her last couple of months living in long-term-care unable to do anything for herself. If only she wasn't so stubborn and had accepted the 24 hour professional help.... [sigh]. That was her consequence.
My MIL's physician also ordered 24 hour care. It may have been a little aggressive on his part, but I certainly wanted at least 12 hours of care a day. She too wouldn't have any part of it. It took 6 months before I could finally get someone in 4 hours a day, twice a week. We've upped it to 8 hours a day, 3 days a week but she refuses anyone other than this one particular caregiver, and she's fired or told me to fire the others I've hired.
She's a fall risk, at a minimum. I'd like more help than she'll accept. The only thing she'd accept is me moving in with her. I have a job, a spouse and animals, live across the country, and flying in one week a month is already more than I can handle at times. Unfortunately, if she falls or has a massive bleed-out (she's also on hospice for a GI bleed), if it doesn't happen when I'm there or the caregiver is there, there will be consequences for both of us.
Others may have risks of falls, malnutrition, health and safety (I'm thinking fire due to leaving a stove on, etc.). In my case, her refusal to have more help is causing me more stress and it has side effects on me.
What are your father's health concerns? Maybe with a little more information, we could suggest other potential consequences that may help you in your decision-making process. Or not. But each individual likely has their own set of risks and negative outcomes.
The doctor ordered the same for my LO. She wasn't too happy, because the only way she could do it was entering into AL, but, we finally convinced her to go, at least for a little while to get her health back. The doctor was clear that she was NOT going to let it go. So, if my LO had stayed steadfast and refused, I know the doctor was going to contact Adult Protective Services, since it was not safe for her to live alone. So, she was either getting the help willingly or it would be taken out of her and her family's hands.
So, I think it depends on the facts and just how dire the situation is. If the judgment of the senior is so poor that their health, welfare and safety is seriously compromised, they may lack the proper judgment to follow doctor's orders.
Koleen, I've been through this a number of times. My father absolutely will not leave his house, regardless of how many doctors tell him to. Their "orders" aren't mandatory; they're making what they in their own opinions think are the best recommendations. My father doesn't have any legal obligation that I know of to accept their orders.
What I've said when some of them really irritate me is ask them if they plan for pay for AL because we can't. That stops them right there; I think most of them don't understand the potential assistance of Medicaid, and I don't plan to enlighten them.
They could file a complaint with APS, but that doesn't mean that APS will necessarily initiate proceedings to take control of your father's life.
It sounds to me that your father is pretty health and doesn't need AL, but probably could get by (as you suggest) with a few hours of help.
Private duty help typically has a minimum of 3 - 4 hours per visit. If you decide to consider this, be prepared to do a lot of leg work. This is a private pay, unregulated environment, and vulnerable to exploitation.
Sometimes I think doctors don't have enough experience to really make a good evaluation of what a patient needs, especially in terms of home vs. institutional care.
Due to a chemical imbalance (potassium and ammonia) my father was unstable, hallucinating and combative. He was taken to ER. They did get him balanced out and said he wasn’t able to go home without 24/7 care. He is home and doing well. He does has dementia. He gets up, showers every morning, makes all of his own meals. I would love for someone to come a few hours a day - I don’t think he would mind that either but I don’t feel he needs constant supervision. Nor does he. What are the consequences for going against doctors recommendation?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
What would be the consequences? It depends on what are your Dad's medical issue. I didn't see anything mentioned in your profile, so you will need to provide that information to help us give you the right answer.
For my Mom, her major health issue was falling. Sure enough a few days later she had a very serious fall, 911 was called, eventually Mom left the hospital to go to rehab, and she spent her last couple of months living in long-term-care unable to do anything for herself. If only she wasn't so stubborn and had accepted the 24 hour professional help.... [sigh]. That was her consequence.
She's a fall risk, at a minimum. I'd like more help than she'll accept. The only thing she'd accept is me moving in with her. I have a job, a spouse and animals, live across the country, and flying in one week a month is already more than I can handle at times. Unfortunately, if she falls or has a massive bleed-out (she's also on hospice for a GI bleed), if it doesn't happen when I'm there or the caregiver is there, there will be consequences for both of us.
Others may have risks of falls, malnutrition, health and safety (I'm thinking fire due to leaving a stove on, etc.). In my case, her refusal to have more help is causing me more stress and it has side effects on me.
What are your father's health concerns? Maybe with a little more information, we could suggest other potential consequences that may help you in your decision-making process. Or not. But each individual likely has their own set of risks and negative outcomes.
Best wishes.
So, I think it depends on the facts and just how dire the situation is. If the judgment of the senior is so poor that their health, welfare and safety is seriously compromised, they may lack the proper judgment to follow doctor's orders.
What I've said when some of them really irritate me is ask them if they plan for pay for AL because we can't. That stops them right there; I think most of them don't understand the potential assistance of Medicaid, and I don't plan to enlighten them.
They could file a complaint with APS, but that doesn't mean that APS will necessarily initiate proceedings to take control of your father's life.
It sounds to me that your father is pretty health and doesn't need AL, but probably could get by (as you suggest) with a few hours of help.
Private duty help typically has a minimum of 3 - 4 hours per visit. If you decide to consider this, be prepared to do a lot of leg work. This is a private pay, unregulated environment, and vulnerable to exploitation.
Sometimes I think doctors don't have enough experience to really make a good evaluation of what a patient needs, especially in terms of home vs. institutional care.