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My mother was living in an independent living facility and doing very well until Covid hit. I was nervous that the virus would get in there so I brought her to my house 2 months ago. She still pays $3000/month for her apartment. I don't know how long this will go on, when will it be safe for her to return? It's stressful having her here and I am dealing with a cancer diagnosis. I'm nervous about bringing in outside help for her.

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Firstly, I am so Very sorry about your own Diagnosis. That has to be rough on you. Listen for when restrictions are lifted and more normalcy is within your state. Every state is different. I woulkd say in July begin the process of getting Mom back to --normalcy. Good Luck and God Bless you. Be safe.
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Poppy11 Jun 2020
Thank you so much
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Poppy you say she's in IL but yet facility does her bathing and medications and it also seems she has cognitive decline. I’ve never heard of independent living doing activities of daily living like showers or handling meds. She seems to be a candidate for assisted living. I would explore that option before she declines further and needs memory care. It’s best to do it earlier than later so she can enjoy the activities and make new friends. Of course doing this after it’s safe. That may be the time to transition. You might talk to the AL director in the meantime and scope it out.
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DILKimba Jun 2020
Actually many IL facilities have ala cart services available like shower assist and MWF management. My inlaws lived in an IL apartment with those assists/services, along with 2 meals a day.
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Independent living is what you wrote so I assume that is what you meant. I have a friend who lives in one and I also get the IL newsletter from my dad's Facility. Both of them were on lockdown for quite awhile and allowed no-one outside. This way they controlled the virus and screened all staffers. I'm not talking about LTC or AL.

You should call the activity director to find out how they are currently handling things. Some are beginning to allow limited visits. Some only outside and some inside with time limits. Some are serving meals only in the rooms etc. so basically to make an informed decision call. When your mom goes back they may require her to self isolate for 14 days which they do at my friend's IL.
some questions to ask:
-how they are screening staff
-have they had cases within IL with staff or residents
-how are meals handled
-how are activities handled
-will she have to self isolate If she returns
Have your list made up and make the call to help you decide.
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IL or AL? Because its my understanding that IL supplies no help and if it does its limited. Those who need help with ADLs usually go to an Assisted Living.

In my area, the numbers are low. Things are opening up. If its like that in your area, then as long as she is careful I see no problem in her returning. Ask the manager of the facility how things are going there.
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shad250 Jun 2020
Numbers may be low for now, but if your area protesting and the folks that go with it, the numers could increase relatively soon.
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You need to take care of yourself. Many of the nursing homes have now tested all staff and seniors, and do it on a regular basis.
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Harpcat Jun 2020
She's not in a nursing home
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Poppy11
In a response you state that you mom does not have the cognitive ability to make the decision as to what to do.
How is she in Independent Living facility? Memory Care would be more appropriate.
I would contact the facility and find out how they are screening staff and residents. If they have residents that test positive are they quarantining them for the recommended length of time? And do they currently have any positive cases where your mom resides?
If they are following proper protocol and you feel comfortable (at least as comfortable as possible given the situation) then make a decision based on YOUR needs and YOUR health at this time.
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Poppy11 Jun 2020
Mom is slightly forgetful, not impaired enough for a memory care setting. They have been getting a positive case occasionally, usually the staff, so that worries me since residents are confined to their rooms. And when that person comes off quarintine, another tests positive. Thank you for your response.
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Those that think they have the answers say 18 months or more to a vaccine; that's a lot of money at $3,000 a month....
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Harpcat Jun 2020
It’s a lot of money whether she's inside or out but it will hold her place.
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What does your mother want to do?
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Poppy11 Jun 2020
Mom does not have enough cognitive ability to safely make those decisions. She relies on me. Only child and no other relatives in area.
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I live in an independant living place. Strick measures were taken begining in March, which none of us like, but it was the right thing to do. Because of that, we are all safe. We have around 100 employees who are screened when they come to work every day. Two got the virus but they had no contact with residents. All wear protective gear at all times. We are not allowed to be together at all and miss our group activities but it is best for now. Residents must wear a mask when out of their apartment and visitors are not allowed. I am glad we are safe. Since we didn't have the virus it would have to come from outside. I am in NJ, which is the 2nd most hard hit from Covid 19. Thing seem to be heading in the right direction now and I hope soon we will be able to do more. I am glad that I live here and feel safe. Wearing a mask, washing hands and keeping distance from others is not that hard and the best things to do. If Mom's place has precautions I would think she would be safe and you would feel better.

M
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Ffollow your state's guidelines for safe return to independent living. Ther is going to be a new normal with all of this and safety is a relative term. I would contact the independent living in regarfsvtobtheir current policy. I'm thinking she may be better off in her apartment as opposed to bringing a caregiver into your home. After all, you won't have full knowledge of the caregivers contacts outside of your home. Given the fact that you are battling cancer that makes you vulnerable. Plus paying rent for an empty apartment doesn't make financial sense. If guidelines allow, I would take her home because the community most likely is practicing good infection control.
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