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Soon we will be moving my 86 year old MIL into an assisted living facility. She will have a small studio - more of a room w/ a bathroom than an apartment. We will bring some of her personal items, but most of what she owns will not be fit to bring. She was very frugal and cleanliness was/is an issue so we cannot bring any of her linens or furniture. Her bed pillows are so thin you wouldn't know they were pillows and are probably 40 years old (seriously). I tried to replace them, but she refused. Knowing there is no way we or the facility will let them move with her we will be buying her new items. I'm looking for advice on what to shop for - colors that work for aging & health, things that are easy to use (lamps with pulls vs. twist), storage, any items to buy I may not know I should. Arthritis in her hands will be a consideration. Taking her shopping physically or on-line is not something for us to do at this time. Here are some things my sister-in-law and I will be looking for:

Furniture -
Twin bed (should we get an adjustable one now?)
Small table (for paperwork, snacks, etc)
Chair
Floor lamp
Table lamp
Nightstand
Chest of drawers

Linens
Towels
Comforter
Sheets (no silk, I'm assuming so she won't slide out of bed!)
Shower curtain
Dish towels
Throw

Misc.
Clock
Hamper
Dishes (very few)
Silverware (very few)
Waste baskets (for bathroom and main area)

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My mom gave me her watch when she went into the hospital. I absentmindedly put it away....somewhere....I was up all night in the ER, my MIL was on the 5th floor (quite ill) and my husband's PD meds were really not working yet. The missing watch was something she brought up often when she was really ticked with me. I finally just bought her a new watch....to this day, I have NO clue where I put it. I think I'm going to be brave and clear out the spare bedroom closet. I need set up my drawing table and stop being too busy to draw....
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Linda 22: REALLY !!! ME TOO ! Except it's a garage full of boxes from Mom's 3br home, the closets of which were FILLED with just her stuff. If you can't find that ONE THING that hasn't been looked at or used EVER in 15 years...then you're the bad guy.
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Ditto on the bric a brac - people kept giving my mom little figures, candles, stuffed animals - when she moved to NH, she took a few things. Now I have these boxes of things I'm afraid to dispose of, for fear she will be asking for something that I pitched. In my case, not being able to lay hands on something creates a continuing issue until I can produce.
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Step away from the bric-a-brac! HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT TO CLEAN ! These little tchotchkes are the bane of my existence- the staff there will probably not want to dust alot of little doo-dads either. Consider a wall mounted (bolted) display case if you must have little bitty keepsake things- can have a light inside that can double as a night light. Something not to opened or played with either. My Mom loves to have every horizontal surface COVERED with stuff- makes for a hard time with dust/pollen/germ control; and is INDEED a hazard. Re: remote controls: every cable provider has special senior-accomodating remotes with huge light up numbers. No fee.Also: any big-box store will have display model flat screens or out of the box units at a fraction of the cost. It's also a safety issue: bolted to the wall ! Worth the price because it tilts and angles as well. For phones: consult your local senior services for access to phones for hearing aid-wearers and/or folks just having a hard time with the phone. They have big light up numbers that talk to you as you dial- and neon lit 'ringers' on base unit and cordless phone handset. Works well here. They are FREE. Free is always good.
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I found that the goodwill store nearby has older TVs that have a push button control without a remote control. My mother never had a remote and it is right beside her bed where she can reach it. The used TVs start at $12 so that is a big savings over a new flatscreen.
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Mthr's memory care does not allow glass unless it's in picture frames. It's too easy for a resident to try to carry a vase full and drop it, and in their haste to clean up the resident and friends get cut. It's been a challenge to find vases that are nice looking plastic, but when I do, I buy one!
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Definitely get the hospital bed for her. Medicare will likely pay for part of the cost if you can get her doctor to write an order for it, which is likely if she has any mobility issues, or especially if she has ever recently fallen. Being able to have the bed go really low, is needed to prevent injury from falls. And ask about the floor rug idea before you buy one. At Dad's memory care AL they are not allow, (they tend to trip up the shuffling gait of these old folk). Several of the AL's we looked at had very small rooms like that. Many of them had a shelf (rather high up, maybe 6 ft up) on the wall in each resident's room. (It kind of looked like a fireplace mantel, without the fireplace) It provided a place to put cherished items. Pictures can go on the walls, but those little rooms leave nearly no space for little statues, and vases, etc.
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My niece had a 12 month calendar made with photos of two of the great grandkids. Also, you could get a frame for each great grand and put a drawing from that child - rotate them out. My mom enjoyed sharing with the aides so we kept her stocked with candies and those little tangerines. She didn't have a dog, but enjoyed giving treats to the other residents' dogs.
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pets are allowed to visit at Dads AL they have resident bird and happy hour every friday with piano music and if allowed alcoholic beverages.
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Teaka123', I've certainly just been through what you're about to go through. My mother just died at 90 after moving to assisted living and my mother in law just recently moved into AL also. They facilities are fabulous. We were allowed to move in their favorite pieces of furniture. The theory was they wanted their residence to feel at home. My mom loved her new place. When we walked in the door in the morning there was a coffee bar, by 4:00 the same bar turned into a happy hour bar and they served appitizers and beverages before dinner and often had awesome live entertainment. They had dogs, and if the workers didn't have enough to do, they were taking care of pets too. I would bring in anything/everything that makes your mom feel at home. We had a much better life and more quality time with both mom's after the moves. I think the place they go to makes a huge difference, my mom got more visitors, better stimulation and way better care after the move (we had 24/7 care in her home), enjoy the experience and she will too!
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Many great ideas here.
Hopefully, I can add a few more: plug-in nightlight(s) with a light sensor, lightweight baskets that can easily be lifted or pulled out of a cabinet to store items, and plastic mattress cover (for potential incontinence issues).
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I would definitely bring a can of lyson, baby wipes (a life saver), and a nice hamper. As for decorating suggestions, I have seen some really nice, small stick-on stars on walls in my mother's facility. You'd be surprised at how these can brighten a room...I would also bring those stick-on hooks that don't damage the wall (another life saver). Good luck.
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Thank you everyone for the helpful suggestions and the advice. It also helps with ideas for what we can give her for birthday and gifts. Things like buying a air freshener will good for her to have something to shop for on a.l. outings.
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One thing I do to dress up my dad's room is put up and change a door wreath often for the seasons and sometimes monthly. It's a conversation piece and dad is always pleased by the attention it gets him. I also put one small decorative arrangement on his dresser which he sees every morning as he is dressing. That is changed often too along with the door wreath.
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for my dads room we look a lazyboy as well as a wooden dining chair with arms where he can sit and get dressed. A dry erase board that staff can write nota on as well as a cork type bulletin board to hang activities calendar. A monthly calendar too. We have 2 two hook birdfeeder out the window so he can sit in lazyboy and watch. I will rig up a thermometer in the spring. We have a digital clock with thermometer on wall about his small tv. I need to find a pull chain lamp with enough wattage as he unscrews the bulb. I also have some air freshners one in bathroom and one by the bed. Plenty of garage cans. I have towels in large plastic totes in bathroom under sink. A shower caddy that holds shampoo, shop etc. A shoe rack in closet and have clothes arranged winter to summer.
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Linda22, I hung a small premade wreath on mthr's front door at memory care, mainly so she can recognize which is hers. We were the first to do this at her facility, and now it is suggested. I would never have thought of that myself, but I did it thanks to someone like you who posted the idea on a similar question 2 years back. Thank you for posting that, I had forgotten how important it was to us!
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Litldogtoo, I have gotten many great suggestions from this post and do not believe it comes from a position of "over think", the same could be said for the amount of thought and research we put into finding a rehab/a.l. facility that would be a wonderful fit for her. It all comes from a position of wanting to do our best for someone and learning from those who have traveled down this road with their loved ones. In fact, one suggestions was put in to play today. It was suggested to see if she can paint the walls. I never would have thought to ask that, but I did and they will now take her color samples before they paint her new studio so that she can be involved from the start. She has no bedside light now so the suggestion that we get a touch or a pull lamp was helpful. As far as the pillow goes - it is a matter of health. She is also attached to her 40+ year old odorous and urine stained mattress, but it will not be coming - again, that is a health decision. We will fix her chest of drawers (broken drawer and broken leg - on books now) and move it to her new studio. She steadfastly, refused to let us fix it when she was at the house. **On a side note. I managed to hold it together today. While visiting mil's new room to be I got a call from the funeral home letting me know my own mama's ashes and death certificates were ready to pick up. I has been such a difficult 2 1/2 wks, but I have much to be thankful for. Now I think I'll go to bed and have a little weep :(
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I bought a heart shaped grapevine wreath at Hobby Lobby and decorated it with seasonal items - spring flowers, Christmas, etc. I put one of those plastic hooks with adhesive on the front door to my mom's AL apartment and hung it there. Many of the residents also had seasonal decorative items by their front doors.
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When I was looking at nursing homes for my uncle the apartment they wanted to show me was not available. We were told we could check out dining area while we were there. Walking down hall my sister and I were talking what a waste of time. A couple came up behind us and said we overheard, come with us we will show you our apartment. Think the suggestion above about seeing what others did was a good idea .
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This is going to sound petty, but I have to ask how you would feel if someone moved you into assisted living, took away your stuff, replacing it with 'new' stuff, then took away your pillow? I realize the pillow is old and in our enlightened world, 'dirty', but I don't believe assisted living is going to be looking over your stuff and telling you not to bring in that pillow. Just cover it with a pillow cover and move it in. If they won't 'allow' it (and I can't believe that to be true) then bring it in in a large tote once she's in there. At some point, once she is settled, you can switch it out. I can't imagine being without my dirty, dusty, old, well-loved pillow!

I would at least bring in some of her things. Ask yourself what it is that makes her home 'home'? Isn't there anything of hers that you can bring in?

Also, look online (I like Houzz) or Google 'Studio Apartment Decorating Ideas' , incorporating and adapting ideas into hers, not yours. What you think SHE WILL WANT, not what you will like. I never liked how my mother decorated her house, but it was HER house.

Older people aren't as flexible as we are, so kneeling to get something from under a cabinet isn't a good idea. I would have most everyday things accessible on a counter. I'd place nothing above her reach, i.e., no step stools. The list goes on.

I'd also Google "Safety for Elders" so you can incorporate the safety features needed to make her life 'safer'. I'd imagine there are some articles on this website.

I believe you are a victim of 'overthink'. I'd see how others have furnished their studios and take it easy. Once she's able to make friends at her new 'home', she may see something in someone's apartment that she likes.
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Good for you! Photo albums & pictures for on her wall are great. Take her favorites. Look for her favorite colors and look for multi-purpose items. If she sends mail, letters or cards, purchase some and order some address labels and stamps, you can keep them in a small but attractive box or basket-look at a craft store for inexpensive decorative boxes and decorating ideas. You can also purchase devises that assist those with arthritis-check them out online or in your local medical supply store. A small storage unit for in the bath is really nice, something that is easy for her to open and that has function is important. I like a wall mounted tv because it doesn't take up valuable table top space.
I use a variety of seasonal silk or dried flower arrangements and switch them out each season-this is an easy way to change the décor. Light weight dishes such as corelle that can be used in the microwave. She doesn't need a lot, look for silver/flat ware that have larger/wider handles, this may be easier for her to use. Make it bright using her favorite colors. There will be an adjustment period, but she will find it easier than living at home. If you make her apartment as homelike as possible, it will help her to adjust quicker.
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If she is used to a double bed, she might roll off a twin, that is if she's able to turn over by herself.

A chair or two for visitors to sit in. If she likes puzzles, the small table should be large enough for that, as well as serve as a dining table for snacks or meals in. She'll probably take most meals in the dining room, but it's nice to have dishes too. You might think about disposables since she'd have to be washing up. However, Corelle is light weight, mostly non-breakable and comes in very nice patterns. If she drinks coffee, she might like a small coffee pot.

Find out in advance what the AL facility might be providing, linens etc. Also see if you can get a floor plan. I've seen such a variety sizes of rooms, that it really depends on the facility as far as what furniture you might be able to comfortably fit. My aunt's has a microwave and full-sized refrigerator and she has a toaster oven. She is old and feeble, no dementia, though. She has her sewing machine and lots of plastic drawer towers for fabric and sewing supplies. She quilts and has a small frame that disassembles. It's really nice where she's at. Huge walk in closet, huge bathroom.
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Bed Bath and Beyond have an inexpensive chrome device that hangs from the top closet rail to create a second rail, great for someone who can't reach up to hang a garment, but can still be in control of the garment situation. Mom balked, but now loves it. i think it was $20. (It's also adjustable.) I found these little things helped alot.
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I just went through this with my mother, though she had much too much stuff, for the small room she was going into, so we had to pick and choose. Her surroundings and décor have always been very important to her, so I tried to recapture what her previous places had looked like, and still have it functional e.g. room for a stretcher if it was needed at any point. I brought lots of family pictures, and some of her paintings that represented her tastes. The maintenance man there will hang them where she wants. The chests and chairs were ones she likes and light weight. We set up a chair so she could watch TV and I made sure to have a few decorative pillows and throws to make her comfortable. I arranged a few books and magazines as she used to have, though she does not read much anymore. She happened to have a guest room bedspread that suited the room very well, so I used that. I bought some silk flowers and made a couple of arrangements and also bought a silk orchid (she loves orchids) for the ledge outside her door and put a piece of her pottery there that blended with it. I bought a nice welcome card and set it on the end table. She said it looked very nice when she arrived, which was great as she is very critical. In a few weeks, I will go to a case conference and also see her and go though her clothing with her as she has things that she will never use again. It will unclutter her closet and gives us something to do together when I visit. I bought some organizers for her socks undies etc. and will sort them then. Also at that time I can make any changes she wants and buy anything she needs. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
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One Word: IKEA ! For all of the items you need. Important: NOTHING ON THE FLOOR ! Emergency lighting: Ace Hardware has tap lights that are great for arthritic hands that also have a pull chain. Can also be used on a nightstand. Have a sensor light installed in the bathroom (no fumbling for a switch) - it's a new switchbox. ANY bric-a-brac should be on SLIM wal shelves. ANY hanging materials should be mounted securely so a bump to the wall won't have them crashing down. Bathroom: think JET PLANE TOILET. What's that? Every need is in a wall mounted holder easily reachable, so she doesn't fall over picking up a kleenex box or a spilled q-tip container. (Again, IKEA or make one- Pinterest, or simply velcro containers to the wall!) My Mom has soooooo much stuff in the bathroom, and I had to finally trim it down and build it out like the hold of a submarine. You can re-purpose over the door shoe bags to hold all kinds of stuff.
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I have found that striped sheets are so much easier to get onto the bed, no matter who changes the sheets. With stripes the sheets are always put on the right way the first time! Also I have found that lamps with a pull cord are easier than lamps with a knob that turns which are hard for people with arthritis. The silk flowers are a great idea and I like using soothing light green colors in with bright yellows and peach tones to make the room brighter. Much luck in the move!
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Not decorating but we bought my dad a light device controller . Plug lights into this then into wall. He then has a controller with 6 buttons, one side on the other off. It comes with 2 plugs. This way he can turn lights on and off himself without fear that he will fall over his walker trying to turn the lights on.
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learningcurve,
great advice concerning control .
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Also: If she likes older things check resale shops, garage and estate sales. New may be regarded as cheap. Utilitarian is necessary but has no character. Her taste and your taste are no doubt different.
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Colors: Take a cue from what she already has. Soft tones & pastels are more soothing/less agitating. Please try to save as much of what she has as possible - drastic change is just that - drastic. Big yes on silk arrangements. My mom has many & enjoys them tremendously. All dolled up & cozy.
When you have everything set up and move her in, ask if it suits her and would she arrange it differently a week later. Please don't be heartbroken if she doesn't like it. You can make it work eventually. Don't hang all the art ahead of time & ask where she wants it. "I wasn't sure where to put this, what do you think/where would you like it?" Give her some control, it's important.
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