My mom is in Nurs. home for recent broken hip. Medicare will no longer pay for care. If she stays there, will be paying $300/day out of pocket, and within 4 months all her funds will be gone (will have to apply for medicaid).
We are instead looking to bring her to our house to live. I am a nurse and would have to take a leave from my job as she is unsafe to stay alone (some dementia and unable to walk alone). HIring an aide to come in for all the hours I am gone is not an option.
Can we charge her monthly rent/board to cover all of the extra expenses we will have and providing her care, and all services-- laundry, transport, all meals, supervision, etc.? (would be less then what she receives monthly in pensions. not touching her small savings)
If she would need to apply to medicaid in the future, would that be a legitimate expense? (she would be paying over $8000/month to stay in nursing home, over $3000/month if in assisted living) .
She is quite forgetful and unsafe to be left alone (even for an hour or so). She is in need of 24 hr supervision (even at night she can tend to get up / wander / history of falls). Any place that she would go at this time would cost much more then what she is bringing in monthly (small amt with SS and pension). Her savings would be drained in a very small amt of time.
Yes, there are family members that would say this is taking advantage, although no other family is willing to do the same. They will not help in any way, and all the responsibility will totally be on my husband and I.
She is unable to live on her own, would have to pay for rent in her own apt., and then also have to pay to have 24 hr caregivers with her (or go into a nursing facility).
If she lives here without paying, then her pension would just be going monthly into her savings with us paying for everything. Just not sure that is fair scenario, while we pay for everything pertaining to her living with us in our home. Difficult to determine and it sounds very bad to "charge a parent to live with you" however there are alot of expenses that come with someone living in your home and caring for them constantly.
Because there may be family conflict, and because it may be necessary to apply for Medicaid in the future, I advise you to keep very careful records of your expenses on his behalf -- trips to doctors, incontence supplies, whatever. And also to put the care and payment arrangement in writing. Realize that you also sometimes need to pay a professional caregiver, unless your sister is willing to provide respite care so that you can get away regularly. No one can do this 24/7/365.
I am dealing with a similar issue with my elderly uncle. Best to get legal advice from a good elder law attorney who can advise the elderly person, caregiver, and POA's the appropriate legal way to spend down the elderly assets, so should they need to qualify for Medicaid, there won't be hiccups. Laws are changing soon. Elder abuse is on the rise-so the laws are changing. So check into while your mom can still make some decisions for herself. But, also realize that the "bottom line" it is her choice.
You can get a contract for caregiving duties and also as landlord or roommates. However, you would also need to claim this income on your taxes. So a good CPA or Tax Preparer is in order.
Like I said best to get a good elder law attorney who is an expert or at least knowledgeable about Medicaid rules.
I suggest that you consult an attorney who specializes in Elder Law for advice on what to do now.
Your Medicaid application would be considered again after a penalty period based on how much you "gave away." Would your daughter help you out for that period? Between your SS and her help, if you can self-pay for that penalty period then you could be on Medicaid.
But I think the first step is to see a lawyer -- and not who handles divorces or tax problems or intellectual property. One who specializes in Elder Law.
Thank you for sharing one of the pitfalls of using your money to enhance the value of someone else's home. Maybe it will keep someone else from learning the hard way.