My grandma was contacted and is being investigated by adult services for financial abuse. Her bank is claiming me and my mother have misused her bank account. I have told them a portion of the money is what my grandmother loaned me for some custody legal fees for my daughter and I am paying her back with my tax return. They are still being pushy and continuing the investigation. They've gotten my grandma to revoke POA from my mother by getting her confused. She has early stage Alzheimer's but is still able to drive and care for herself everyday.
If APS becomes involved it is easy for them to get a court order for disclosure of financial records. They can do it on an emergency basis, a matter of days. It is always best to cooperate with them. Not doing so only raises red flags.
When I was investigated it was actually a relief. I thought that finally the allegations and accusations from twisteds would finally stop. 😄😄 Of course they didn't oh those twisted minds were certain that the pros must be wrong.
Oh those dysfunctional families...
If grandma, in this case, is still deemed competent (I see that she passed the written and driving tests as well as being deemed competent enough to be talked into revoking the POA, under duress or not - they still deemed her competent to do this), grandma could direct her POA to gift money. There is nothing illegal in that. It is not a wise idea, esp if funds are limited, because if she ever needed Medicaid that would play against her.
My point is why would the bank and APS assume financial abuse off the bat? No idea how much money was involved and there seems to be more than just the granddaughter loan, but if grandma wants to gift money and tells POA to do it, she can. POA could override this if deemed unwise to proceed. If she does proceed, it is always best to CYA by getting something in writing, notarized (can't hurt to query the attorney who drew up the POA as well.)
My mother was giving each of us money (under the IRS limit for tax-free gifting) before the dementia started. When I realized she was having cognitive issues, I said NO to her doing it again (she was going to, and OB was eager to get his next 'installment'. I figured we needed to preserve whatever she had at that point, so that there would be funds to cover a facility when it was needed. This was the best idea and so far she has enough funds for years to come! BTW she's 96 now - hopefully the trust will outlast her!)
While typing all that, I recall that on taking over mom's finances, I wanted all the eggs in one basket, to make the task easier for me to manage. She had a second account at a local bank, for easier access if she needed cash. I was NOT on the account and never did business with them (so they didn't know me at all.) I took her and the DPOA document to the bank and was able to withdraw all the funds (by bank check and it wasn't pocket change!) and close the account. Mom just stood there rifling through her wallet and purse - she never said a word and wasn't asked anything. I then took her to the CU to deposit this into her primary account. I didn't take anything from it, but that first bank had no idea what I would be doing with the money and never asked. I never heard a word about it! Of course I could show it was deposited to her account and used for her benefit, but still.... The bank never said a word and no APS stuck their nose into the business! Funny (odd) too because I have read so many comments from people who complain that banks won't honor the POA documents.
I hope you have very strong and well-documented evidence that your grandmother authorised the loan to you voluntarily and understands how and when it is to be repaid to her.
What other money is it alleged has been misused?
Anyone with POA for finances is required to keep careful and meticulous records. Taking a loan from someone whose finances you are handling, especially if that someone is even mildly impaired, is a real no-no, and if it is done for some reason it should be overseen by a lawyer with clear written contract.
Hope you will be able to work it out for what is best for everyone.
Depending on the level of Alzheimer's she is in, will also dictate whether or not anyone but her can have a POA changed. If activated, the POA was necessary, then a simple letter from her Doctor should help in resolving this issue. I believe that most POA documents state all the responsibilities and legal rights over the bank account. Read it - What you and your mother did just may be illegal. Get the #$$$ paid back as quickly as possible.
Good luck. POA's are never easy and need to be followed to the letter.
I'm also responding to your reply below... Thanks for jumping back in. Like I said, there are often gray areas regarding things we see as black-and-white. In our defense, we only know what we can infer from your posts. This seems like an awful experience for you, your mom, and your grandma, so I hope you've at least learned that getting things in writing up-front can save you a lot of headaches down the road.
One thing still confuses me, though. If your grandmother is unable to act on her own behalf and vouch for the withdrawal with her bank, how is she capable of revoking her POA? Can't have it both ways, I would think. I feel like I'm still missing something, so I definitely agree with mstrbill and suggest consulting a lawyer.
"If You always do the right thing then you will never have anything to worry about".
I am my dad's guardian and I am accountable to the Court for every PENNY of his money - and they review his financials annually. It's stressful, keeping up with everything, but his money will go for what he needs. period. that's the way it should be - it's his money- not mine.
This is a family affair and your grandmother's money to do as she pleases, whether it's to loan you money or not. If she is at the early stages, if she understands and consents, then that is her right. It is not unusual for custody legal fees to come from family or friends.
It's always best to have some written contract. If there is not one, then it's between the two of you to agree on a payment plan if that was the understanding. Otherwise, the money more likely would be considered a gift. This is not a bad thing because you are her grandchild protecting your child.
My concern is that APS and police may seem like the authority which your grandmother may rely on, however she may need her lawyer to trust in this situation. If your grandmother's choice of poa is revoked, was this done fairly to her. Did this just require your mother or you to formalize agreements in her best interest.
Several years ago I loaned my Son-n-Law some money, It was done on paper with a payment schedule written in and I charged him minimal interest. He didn't finish paying me back. I still have the paperwork and will never loan him another dime. If he asks why, I still have that paper work to show him.
You know the old picture of a baby sitting on a potty with the words, "No job is finished until the paperwork is done".
You still there? I know some of the responses may have been difficult to hear, but this is a touchy subject for a lot of members; and it is absolutely black-and-white (except when it isn't). I think a great thing about this forum is that people can learn from other people's successes or failures, so I would love to hear more details on what's going on.
The way to do a legal loan when a POA is involved is to have it in writing, minimal interest rate IS to be paid, and the loan is to start being repaid in 30 days. Per our elder care attorney here in GA. That also stands up to Medicaid scrutiny.
Her money used for her. Think about that why would anyone agree to being a POA for an ALZ LO?
Would it not have been better (hindsight) to borrow from mom and pay her back? Can you do that now, to get them off your back? Another option is often credit cards offer balance transfers, many with a low fee (go for the ones that give you time, no interest and just a fee - I have done this to help my daughter, she transfers money to me to pay the monthly amounts. Typically they charge 3-5% upfront and no interest, while some have no fee no interest.) Waiting for the tax return, assuming what you get will be enough to cover the entire loan, could take some time. (BTW, grandma has plenty in her trust fund, but I would NEVER take anything from there to help my daughter out, even if "grandma" approved! I really don't even take anything other than occasionally gas money for managing everything for her - finances, medical care, meds and OTC needs, even though I have POA - EC atty, when I said POA does not say I can take money for doing all this, replied it doesn't say I can't, but personally I would not consider it! I could certainly use a "loan" to get my house repairs finished and pay it back when my funds are available, but I will NOT.)
There are also concerns about her driving. You say "She has early stage Alzheimer's but is still able to drive and care for herself everyday." The problems here are 1) if she gets into an accident, insurance could deny payment(s) and 2) there is no way to determine the timeline of any kind of dementia - some progress faster than others, and there are NO warning signs when the next "stage" will be. While our mother was in early stage, she was "able" to care for herself, but there were many things she wasn't able to do and she lived alone, so we couldn't see the full impact. When she reported a flat tire and I found it split from the rim to the ground, metal around wheel well bent half off, consult with YB and we worked on taking it away before she hurt/killed herself or someone else. Around that time (needed to take her grocery shopping is when I realized she was not cooking anymore, relying on boxed crap and frozen dinners. So, although someone "appears" able to drive and care for themselves, appearances can be deceptive! I would seriously consider getting her off the road.
As POA your mother is responsible for making wise decisions that are in your grandmothers best interest. Loaning you money is not in your grandmothers best interest.
The County can take you to Court and appoint a conservator (expensive -- and your grandma pays).
As she is still driving with Alzheimer's, the Courty can also appoint a guardian to stop her and to make sure she is cared for.
GET AN ATTORNEY.
National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys
https://www.naela.org/findlawyer
<naela@naela.org>
NAELA Council of Advanced Practitioners
1577 Spring Hill Rd., Suite 310
Vienna, VA 22182
703-942-5711
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If she does have mild dementia, I would advise OP to have Grandma hire an attorney to fight for the her and the family. Assuming the transaction was as innocent as described.
That the bank in their due diligence reported that after Mum had POA on Gma's accounts, an unusually large sum was removed from Gma's account, is a good thing.
OP should be hiring her low lawyer to help her. To have Gma's funds used to hire a lawyer to defend OP is once again misuse of her funds and digging a bigger hole.