My 90 year old mother has had 3 caregivers in her home for 10 months now. Two caregivers work (and sleep) 60 hours straight and the third caregiver works (and sleeps) 48 hours straight. The caregivers are doing a super job with preparing mom 2 balanced meals per day, cleaning the house, and ensuring she is taking her medication (very little medication)....I can't complain about that.
After 10 months and having developed a relationship with mom.... I expect more now from the caregivers and more assistance is required.
1. They do not ensure she is drinking enough fluids during the day, even after 2 UTIs. I have suggested cranberry juice, vitamin water, Gatorade...it's not happening.
2. She also needs a shower once/week.....I, her daughter, am getting her into the shower while the caregiver is sitting and reading a book,
3. The caregivers need to get mom out of her chair and out of the house to walk (with he walker). Her muscles are declining and she is more afraid now to fall. They leave her in her chair with a video on.
4. The caregivers need to get up from their sleep between 4 - 8am in the morning to get mom to the bathroom before there are any accidents.
The response I receive from the agency and the caregivers is that " We can't force her".
These caregivers get paid by the HOUR ( including get paid by the hour to sleep for 8-10 hours) a day.
Help.....what should I do??
If you are giving your Mother a shower once a week, why should the Caregiver bother if you are doing it? Ask the Caregiver to help you, so she can learn the best way to help your Mother shower.
Instead of waking Mom up between 4:00 and 8:00 a.m., put a blue sheet on her bed to catch any accidents.
As for Gatorade, does your Mother take pills for high blood pressure? If the answer is yes, don't give her Gatorade, one cup has 110 mg of sodium. Plain water is the best.
an idiotic hospice aid crammed my mom in the shower once and bout scrubbed the skin off of her back . we took control of our home at that point and hospice started answering to us ( mom ) . my mom was 80 yrs old , not 2 or 4 ..
2) Have you specifically told the caregiver to give Mom a shower? Will Mom let the caregiver help her shower? Have you tried the both of you giving the shower together for a few times?
3) They can't force her. Maybe having a routine where she goes for a short walk after breakfast each day, and also mid afternoon, would help.
4) I really don't like the idea of waking someone up to take them to the toilet. If Mom wakes up, sure, help her to the bathroom. I'm not convinced that avoiding an accident is worth disrupting sleep. Instead, prepare for accidents, and expect the caregiver to do the laundry and make the bed.
I think what you "should do" is renegotiate what tasks the caregivers are expected to do, and also accept that they are not magicians who can make your mom do what she doesn't want to do.
And I also think you should consider ba8alou's suggestion for re-evaluating the value of being home vs being in a care center. What is really best for Mother?
Are you paying a lower rate that allows the caregiver six hours sleep (that is what it is in this area) or the higher rate that requires them to stay awake?
Not all the same. I have been in healthcare for 25 years and now take care
Of my mom who lives with my husband and I.
I am sorry you have to deal with that,it's not ok and I wish you luck.
Some people will not change. If you attend a church., you might consider getting 2 or 3 people to train and bring them in. This is what I did. I lived in the Fl. Keys
and it was a drive but found people to help.