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My heart's been very heavy lately. I want to stop caregiving for my mom. Im tired, my body aches, even with taking care of myself by eating right and exercising. I feel trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I put her someplace, her attitude could cause someone to physically harm her. We've all heard the nh horror stories. If I keep her home, I run myself into the ground and give up whats left if my life. These last few years having been trying to say the least... just needed to vent I guess.

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I think it may be time to place your mother. There are good places and bad ones, you just need to find the right one that your mother can afford. Her attitude wouldn't be the first attitude that the professional caretakers have dealt with. Don't destroy your health and well-being to take care of her.
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Dear anerhill,

I'm very sorry to hear how you feel. I know its hard. Sending you love and hugs. I know we all feel trapped at one point or another. Please know there is always help. Don't be afraid to talk to a social worker or family doctor. There are resources in the community and through church.

Try to look for respite care or more home care. Start visiting nursing homes. There are good ones out there.

Be kind to yourself. Please know you are not alone. I hope you can find the right care for your mom and give yourself a much needed respite.
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Thanks guys for being supportive. I'm so grateful to be among others that understand the struggle. Being able to receive respite care has been challenging to the point of nearly impossible with available resources in the area. We're relocating to Washington state where medicaid offers a greater range of services. Thanks for the responses, wish us luck and send prayers up for needs being met. Thanks again guys.
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Respite, yes! Even a one hour drive away, picnic in the car counts.

Prayers Anerhill. Right now.
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Dear anerhill,

Good luck, my friend. Sending all my thoughts and prayers. Take care of yourself. And let us know if Washington State works out better.
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If there is an adult day health program where you are moving, that can be a wonderful source of respite for you, and a little stimulation for your mother.
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Well, moving day is upon us! From the information I've managed to gather so far, Washington has day centers that accept incontinent persons. Yes lord. AND, they have all day adult centers, like 24 hours! AND WEEKENDS!!!!!!!Oh my goodness fellow caregivers and family, my heart is soaring. I pray this works out the way I hope. Thanks for the support angain guys!!
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Dear anerhill.

Glad you are happy and were able to find these adult day centers in your area. Please keep us posted.
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((((((((hugs)))))))) anerhill
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