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These commercials do bother me. I have flashbacks of my mother falling. I think they put fear in everyone’s mind, the elderly and caregivers. My mom is no longer living with me. As most of you know she is at my brother’s house but the commercials still get to me.


Yes, they want to show how the product works and maybe I am just overly sensitive to the commercials.


Also, the radio commercials with the ads for caregivers on AARP. The ones that tell you to go to the AARP website for caregiver tips. They promote being a caregiver and not everyone is cut out to be a caregiver.


It’s interesting because I don’t see commercials for assisted living or nursing homes very often. But when I toured assisted living facilities they hounded me endlessly to get my business, invitations to all sorts of functions!


Some of them were very high pressure. Not all of them but it’s obvious that they keep everyone’s phone numbers on file and do many follow up calls.


I am surprised with all of the seniors that there aren’t more commercials for products pertaining to their needs. I see the ones for pads or diapers occasionally but unless it’s an infomercial on something, not much else like canes or walkers.

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Sorry, meant to put this under products not care decisions.
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Me, hate the drama and how they affect many of the viewers.

Talk about needs, I have always thought that a tracker could be put right under ones skin, IMO this would be a real asset in locating those with dementia. Here in Florida, we are always looking for a senior who is lost! I imagine that someone is
working on this idea, it would be a big money maker.
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I’m bothered by the constant phone calls multiple times a day on my cell phone & land line for these life alerts. I’ve been getting them for over a year now & they just don’t stop! They even spoof their phone # so it looks like a local call.
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NHWM,
Of course it is going to bother you, because you have lived it, and you still worry about your Mom's welfare.
But you are going to need to take a big break from even thinking about this.
Stop watching the commercial, and get up to vacumn the floors. imo.

Putting this under "Care Decisions" was perfect, a perfect topic.

Try not to beat yourself up NHWM. Giving up care to others does become necessary, many times. You were going to be tortured either way. It is your Mom's illness, not you.

Treat yourself better, by not becoming like her, imo.
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They certainly do give off a "feel" of frantic-ness, at least to me.

In my 'world' both MIL and mother wear these. When they fall, and they do, and the alarm goes off, not ONCE has anyone on the 'call list' responded to help. And in mother's case, she LIVES in the same house as 4 of the 5 'first responders'.

Either the alarm is not loud enough or the person is not aware of what THEY need to do to activate the system. Mother can't make herself 'known' to the dispatcher, and MIL is so deaf you have to scream at her to get her to hear. She recently fell, set off the alarm, the dispatcher is trying to talk to her, the phone calls to DH and his sister are employed and then finally 911. It wasn't until she wandered into her kitchen and saw a firefighter readying himself to break her plate glass window to get in that she even had a clue as to what was going on. She still doesn't--but then this is a woman who thinks her burglar alarm system actually sends out some kind of powers to keep burglars away from her house.

So--maybe they work and maybe they don't. Imagine my YB's embarrassment when he finally goes to the door and meets the EMT's who showed up to lift mom off the floor, when there are 7 people living in the same house. They did tell him he would be fined, if this kept happening.

They are better than nothing, I guess. But the person wearing one has to be able to remember to wear it, not send it through the washer & dryer (it will go off) not bang it into their walker....not take it off if your're going to soak in the tub and put it so far from the tub you can't activate it if you can't get out of the tub.

Dolly mentioned about an 'under the skin' tracker like the put on pets. Maybe someday that will be the way to go. In 'my life' the life alerts have not been helpful at all.
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Yes, I've seen them and they are disturbing. They might be true, but, are playing on people's fear of protecting a senior.

There is one out there about promising mom to never make her leave her home.....
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NHWM,
Will this help you?
Your body may be setting up to have a panic reaction without your mind and emotions even thinking about it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7KQsS2kLM4
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Sendhelp, I don’t think Needhelpwithmom was having a panic attack, just being realistic. She is not turning into her Mother either.
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NeedHelpWithMom- I hear you. Those commercials, especially that one drive me nuts. My mom fell this summer and was not wearing her Life Alert thingy and actually did lay on the floor for 3 hours and holler "help me I've fallen and I can't get up". Until one of her equally frail, tiny neighbors in her senior living , thank God had her hearing aids in and heard her and got help.
The one that gets me is for some home caregiver agency, I don't know which one, but it shows a lovely well maintained old home, near a lovely body of water and two doting adult children with their yet lovely, smiling mom. Then the narrator says something like " dad made us promise we wouldn't put mom in a nursing home". I'm not a fan of the deathbed promise- so guilt inducing. Yeah if we could have kept mom independent longer I sure would have. But I was her vesion of assisted living. She there for reals now. I guess there's just no good way to make a commercial about these topics. I do like some of the sassy incontinence garmet ones thought, they at least have a modicum of dignity. And youngish, dancing incontinet folks ejoying their freedom. Oh and the Hurri-cane, flexible cane thingy. I fell for that and ran right out and got her and my husband one. They both hated them. For Christmas my son got my mom some sort of egg crate cushion which she LOVES. Her only and favorite grandson bought it. Just today I'm a sucker for senior products that make their lives easier. Shopping used to be so much fun. Not anymore!
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I’m REALLY IRRITATED by the ads that imply that it’s easy to hire a beautiful vivacious literate aide who is a great cook speaks any language fluently LOVES anyone over 90 who has gray hair loves to change diapers and clean up messes has waited her who.e life to button your 97 year old dad’s shirt buttons and listen to him talk about his late wife etcetcetcetcetc

NOTHING, NOTHING AT ALL IS EVER EVEN REMOTELY like how it looks in those tv ads.

Lets have just a LITTLE truth in advertising, PLEASE!!
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Thanks for your responses. Whew! Glad that I am not the only one annoyed by these marketing ploys.
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Send,

I am not having a panic attack. Was just curious if others have ever been annoyed by the marketing hype. It just seems overdone to me. Not realistic. But I guess most marketing is handled this way.

It’s that alarmist mentality that I don’t care for. I see it in our local weather forecasters. Some are very good, matter of fact reports. Others, oh my word, they are alarmists and it gets under my skin.

It’s psychology. When I managed a retail store and a few items did not sell I would place a sign up that said, “Sale! Buy one get one free.” I would only reduce the price slightly but the items would then sell quickly. People don’t want to miss a sale!

I don’t beat myself up. I have bad memories but that is natural. I don’t obsess. I have passing thoughts like anyone else does. I am relieved not to be mom’s caregiver anymore. Whatever happens, happens.

I gave up the responsibility of being caregiver and I made the right decision. That doesn’t mean that I don’t care but I have accepted that I don’t have a healthy relationship with mom. But even when she lived here it was a struggle.

She wasn’t one to cooperate or compromise. She felt a need to control. My brother is retired law enforcement so it’s perfect for him! Let him control her. He controlled people in his profession. Plus, she won’t fight him as an authority. He’s an important man! My mom was quite sexists. Many in that generation were.

Thank God it’s no longer my problem. Thank God for this forum who helped so much. Thank God for my therapist. Most of all, thank God for my husband and daughters.
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Sendhelp says, "Stop watching the commercial, and get up to vacuum the floors. imo." Please do not do that, under any circumstances!!! Vacuuming is like ironing.........obsolete these days if you buy a Roomba! LOL.

Take a yoga class instead. Eat some chocolate. Go buy a luxury purse. Meet a friend for coffee.

Just do NOT 'vacuum the floors', k? :)
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Sunny,

Yes, thanks for expressing it better than I did. They are manipulative commercials. Trying to persuade vulnerable seniors and it just bugs me.
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hahaha, very hard not to see commercials these days! They play a bazillion of them. Sometimes I record shows and fast forward through the commercials because they take up so much time. Seems like half the show are the commercials!
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Mid,

We had so much trouble with those devices I had to cancel the service. I suppose some companies are better. We had the Humana. Oh my gosh, there was a delay in answering. Once I told the person who picked up that I had to call 911 myself. Plus mom couldn’t hear through the device so it was not useful for us. For some, I suppose they are. But things don’t always want like they do on a commercial!
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Lealonnie,

Hahaha. I want one of those robot vacuums! Love your style! And your great suggestions.

Unfortunately, I still do vacuum. It’s like Elaine expressed though. She read me well. I am not having a panic attack. Bad memories, you bet.

If I am in the same room when the commercials come on I can mute the television.

You know how those stupid commercials run. They play the same ones over and over! So you can’t help but see them. So overdone. That’s marketing for you. They are working hard to convince us of what they want to sell. Look at toy commercials for kids! Or the cereal commercials that came on during their cartoons. This is why I would put on PBS shows for my kids. Better shows and none of the commercials. I watch PBS a lot for myself too.

I have severe tinnitus and so I always have the television or music on regularly to drown out the ringing in my ears. I’ve had it since my 20’s. My doctor told me that I went to too many loud rock concerts as a teen.

I’m not always watching the television. But they broadcast the commercials mega loud. So you can’t help but hear them even if you walk off to get water in the kitchen or go to the bathroom, etc.

Wait, I have a funny story about those Rumbas. My husband’s friend at work got one. He also just got a little puppy that wasn’t quite house trained. Well, he programmed the vacuum, went to work, his puppy had an accident, he had dog poop smeared all over his house when he got home! Can you imagine? LOL
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Jada,

Yes, the telephone solicitations are out of hand. I don’t answer any number that I don’t know. I have a bazillion numbers blocked and like you say they even use local numbers to try and trick us.
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Dolly,

Tracker, that’s interesting because we have had a few escapes from residents living in assisted living near me. Thank God, they weren’t harmed but they could have been.

There is a daycare that closed for the same reason. They didn’t notify the family. It was a bad situation.
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Tacy,

I don’t mean to laugh or make fun of anyone’s weight but you are so right! We had a caregiver from an agency that was super obese. Mom was afraid of her bathing her. I was too. She seriously could barely manage. I did the majority of the work because this woman was too obese to put mom’s compression stockings on. Everything made her out of breath! She was no help to us. I hated to complain to the agency but I had to when she couldn’t do any of the work properly.

I don’t know how they fit in a car to drive. How do they do it? Their stomach is so big. How do they fit comfortably? They have to have the seat pushed all the way back. Good thing she was tall and her arms and legs could reach to drive the car.
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Sunny,

The commercial promising that people don’t ever have to leave home may be for the stairlift.

I think stairlifts are good. I have known people who have them. I have seen them using them. They are quite slow but I guess they can’t be speedy! They are transporting the elderly.

Still, there comes a time that some people shouldn’t be living at home anymore and a facility with a staff is the best choice.
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Siouxann,

Yeah, the one with the woman dancing wearing the poise pads or whatever brand it is. I agree, sassy, modern and cute.

Wait, what about the stupid one encouraging us to order online so we won’t be embarrassed to buy the items in a drugstore. Hahaha.

Want to hear something funny? One time I was exhausted, hubby called and wanted to know if I needed anything from the store and I sent him a pic of mom’s poise pads and depends diapers. Oh my gosh! My mother had a fit! She blew a rod because I allowed a man to purchase that. Please! My husband bought tampons for me and our two daughters! He didn’t care.

You know, I was always concerned about mom’s feelings and did everything to make her comfortable. But there comes a time when we give and give and give until we are exhausted!

Daddy helped her with things and that was fine. But oh, I was supposed to be super duper woman and do it all! That’s nonsense and I finally woke up.
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The ads I hate have to do with breast cancer. Earth to Madison Avenue, there are patients who are NOT running around with a lot of energy, happy, and smiling. There are side effects to these meds that make you want to hide from the world.

And I don't want to be reminded for my ordeal a half dozen times a day. For ten years I've been trying to get into my new normal, and these ads are not helpful.

Take those ads, along with the other pill ads , and use those multi-millions to pay for research and development. I bet 99% of the people don't even remember the names of the meds.
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Freqflyer,

They do show the same ads a bazillion times a day. Yes, medication ads too. Advertising is expensive! My neighbor across the street is a pharmaceutical sales rep. Oh my gosh, she does very well. Drugs are a huge business!
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I am appalled with those commercials. Shame on them. Nobody should give their business to those creeps
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Jules,

Some of the commercials are so ridiculous. Years ago I dated a guy whose father was in marketing. He said the average ad was targeted to the intelligence of a 12 year old. I believe it. Sounds about right. Sad, huh?
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Oh---the DEVICES and support system worked great. It was the HUMAN factor that failed.

Neither mom could make their voice heard to the dispatcher. Nobody on the call list answered their phones. So, EMT's are called.

With brother's home--he has his 4 adult (over 21) daughters still living at home and he and his wife and the girls keep ridiculous hours, nobody gets up before 3 pm and then they are up half the night. I don't think I have gone to mother's in years before noon and somebody was up and moving. YB took my key to the house in fit of pique, but then put me 2nd on the call list, Talk about crazy. I'm not on the call list at all now, but I can get to her house within 5 minutes.

My own sweet grandma put HER life alert on the bathroom vanity and got into a nice hot tub. Had a minor stroke, and couldn't get up to hit the alert button. She was in that bathtub for 2 DAYS until my mom called me and said she couldn't get hold of GG, had I heard from her. I said no and immediately called 911.

So--I have personal reasons for not placing a lot of trust in those things.
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Mid,
Hahaha, my mom did the same thing! She couldn’t carry on a conversation with them over the device. Yes! She would place the device on the back of the toilet because she didn’t want it to get wet! I had to tell her to leave it on before I bathed her in the shower.
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I do think those commercials are somewhat stupid, especially in the age of cell phones. Your cellphone is next to your body most of the time. I personally had one of those necklaces three years ago. I was on a heavy dose of pain meds and kept constantly falling and breaking bones. The very last episode was when I finally fell flat on my face and broke my nose. There was blood everywhere and I actually laughed. How can someone fall flat on their face and not brace themselves with their arms and hands? Well anyway - I do not even remember now if I used that device or my cellphone. Help arrived and I was carried off. I paid over fifty dollars a month for that button. The ambulance did not arrive any quicker.

My pain meds were decreased after that incident. I no longer fall every time I get up, but my fear has stayed and actually gotten worse. Yet when I see that commercial I think it makes elderly people look sort of stupid and whiney. I am a former nurse (once a nurse always a nurse as the saying goes), but I do not believe I have ever sounded like those people on my TV that fell on the floor, in the tub, or in the park. Yes - I am very aware of the falls that happen where no one finds them for three days or more - and yes - that is terrible. Still, do aging cause you to whine like that? There are many reasons of falling, and it is often hard to prevent them - but if you are not totally passed out after the fall, you should really sound more matter of fact. Nothing can be changed - the consequences of falling remain the same.
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Need, those commercials bother me, too.  I get upset, and can't watch them.  I know they're selling a helpful product, but wish they'd find a way to do it that doesn't bring back memories or cause more worry.

It's disheartening to me that there aren't more commercials for products to help seniors that not only cater to their physical needs, but their love for whatever lovely things they recall, and their emotional needs, too.
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