My grandpa, 84 yo, recently lost his wife of 61 years to an aggressive brain tumor in March 2015. We had some time, 3 months, before her passing to help assist grandpa with getting up to speed with household management as grandma handled everything household related.
Within a month after her passing, grandpa met a woman at the senior center and after one visit, she quickly became a regular household visitor. Grandpa would take her to expensive restaurants several times a week which was very uncharacteristic of his financial expenditures. It was within a week of their meeting that he was confronted and warned by someone at the senior center of her money scheming intentions. But grandpa, deathly afraid of being all alone, refused to take heed. Needless to say, the family is not happy at all.
Fast forward 5 months, she is at his residence every day. She has requested he buy her glasses, take her on vacations, buy her a new car, take her gaming (and give her money to gamble because "she is luckier at the casino when she gambles with other's money") and she recently asked him to add her to his checking accounts. We've done a little research on her background and found she has a gambling addiction, previous troubles with unpaid taxes, SEC8 housing, and a bad reputation for being a swindler. She has convinced grandpa that his family is awful and only wants his money. He has met with a lawyer and revoked his children's financial access. From what we can tell, he's out a minimum of $40K in 5 months without any explanation of where the money has gone.
Lawfully, there is nothing the family can do about this as he is willing giving money to her. While we, the extended family, can clearly see her true intentions, Grandpa desperately doesn't want to be alone so gives in to all of her requests. He has stopped taking his medications and refuses to see a doctor. Soon, we imagine, he'll stop taking our phone calls as well as she has convinced him that his family is no good.
While he is quickly loosing his entire life savings, we feel like we are losing the patriarch of our family.
Is there anything we can do?
Call the United States Senate Special Committee on Aging. Their website says that "If you or a loved one have been the victim of fraud, please contact us at 1-855-303-9470."
I agree with Ruthie that you should not let the Senior Center off the hook. Bad publicity is every town official's nightmare. If this woman's name doesn't appear on the records then the senior center director is lazy with the paperwork. I would want to know whether the director was hired after a thorough background check. Start asking town officials the hard questions - policy questions. You have the right to know whether the senior center really is a safe place and that everyone who works there checks out. Keep up the tremendous work, Support!!!
What would be great is if the police set up a sting operation.
This is just so disgraceful. I'd love to see them caught and exposed.
My point was that the officials have been made aware that this woman is using the Senior Center as hunting grounds, has found at least one victim, but the officials have failed to take action to prevent her activity.
There used to be a level of liability difference between actual and constructive notice, with the former raising the level.
I wasn't aware a Bench Warrant was issued though for a civil judgment; it's been years since I've had any experience with one, but I thought that civil judgments could be entered with the defendant in absentia, and a true copy just sent to him/her, just as a Default Judgment would be handled.
Bench Warrants to the best of my knowledge are issued for failure to appear in response to a Subpoena or some criminal action.
Another possibility: get a copy of the civil Judgment as well as the pleadings (or have your attorney do it) to see what the civil case was about. You may have to go all the way back to the original Complaint.
If it's for scamming (i.e. a suit by another victim), you've hit paydirt. Copy the complaint, judgment and send it to the Senior Center and anyone in charge at the city/county level.
You might try pulling a legal maneuver on them, after discussing first with your attorney, and advise them (assuming that the suit is for some financial victimization) that they have "constructive and active notice" that this woman who's scammed before is being allowed in the Senior Center, using their premises to identify at least one victim, and that their failure to prevent her access could affect their liability if they're providing and allowing her to use the Center as a place to identify victims.
It might be a stretch, so check with your attorney first. But municipal officials can tend to be more concerned if their actions or inactions are on the line.
Maybe it's also time to anonymously send a copy of the pleadings you obtain (as well as a copy of the Bench Warrant if it's filed before she's located and commandeered) to the local news stations, with information on having contacted various governmental entities that haven't done anything.
I would, however, not contact the swindler's family yourself. You don't know whether or not these people are violent.
Much as I detest Facebook, this is one case in which it's been helpful. It's also hard to imagine anyone who's a scammer being so stupid as to post information about her activities online in a social media site, but then, thank God for stupid people.
UPDATE ON OUR DIY INVESTIGATION -
Oh Facebook. I am thankful for people with public profiles. We have located the swindlers entire family!! All of her children and grandchildren. We even have an address! But no current phone numbers. Our next plan is to contact them.
We met with a lawyer who estimates this process of obtaining guardianship at a minimum of $10K. DANG. That's out of reach. However, he ran a quick report on this woman and she has an open and active court civil judgement for $3100. She never showed up to court for it and now has a warrant!! We are calling the police today. Now, I realize that when she gets picked up, Grandpa will bail her out. And probably pay her fine. So we are strategically planning a way on how to handle this that will get him back on "team family" and not "team scammer".
Also, we spoke with the senior center, police [prior to knowing about the warrant], the department of human services and APS. No one will do a darn thing about this. This is beyond frustrating. I wrote to the DOJ and FBI last week too but of course have heard nothing.
What I have observed, fortunately most of them burn themselves out after a few months or years of agony for the family. But some result in disastrous late in life marriages These scammers aren't only at senior centers. They attend funerals of people they barely know, work as receptionists at investment businesses, and troll bereavement groups.
There is no surviving spouse in this case.
JoAnn, I think you're right; I do think men are more vulnerable when their wives dies first - wives really can hold a family together and provide support which men may not realize until they're gone. That's not a criticism, just perhaps the way things are.
I'm not sure withholding funeral obituaries would help in the long run. Word gets out. Surviving spouses meet new people. The only real legal protection that I know of is an irrevocable trust. However that is an understandably difficult decision for many elders to make.
Without prying or making you feel uncomfortable, I'm wondering if the FBI was informed, or any national task force on fraud? I suspect these people may move from town to town or even state to state, and unless there's a pattern detected by multiple law enforcement departments or at state and national level, they could get away with their activities for some time. I'm guessing they change their names as often as they change their locations.
Frustrated and your posts have been very sad and unsettling, but also insightful and helpful, and have helped me make a decision that I've been considering, which is not to print obituaries in newspapers or online, and specifically make it a part of any funeral contract I sign that there will be no public notification. I might even require that posting of the funeral in the funeral's website be withheld.
The people who need to know are ones I'll be contacting anyway, there can be a memorial sheet of relevant facts for attendees, and no one who isn't contacted need be aware of empty houses of relatives on the funeral day, empty house of the deceased, or who any of the relatives are.
We (the victim's two nephews and families) tried to intervene as best we could from out of state. Both my husband and his cousin made multiple trips to try to help. But legal efforts came too late. The vermin disappeared and were never caught. They left him almost destitute and he died soon after. The uncle's estate was worth about $300K.
I'm wondering now if Support's GF is in contact with only one of a group of scammers. Raises a lot of new questions.
But I am sorry to learn that your family was victimized by scammers. That must have been so frustrating. Did the police ever get involved and were any of these people ever caught?
I've just been reminded of some families who do this, moving around to keep out of law enforcement's radar.
One thing I did not see mentioned. These scammers often work in groups. There is often an enticing person who endears him or her self to the victim. They may work in cahoots with some one who knows how to quickly manipulate financial and legal information stolen from the victims. They are pros. In the case in our family they were on the scene mere days after the uncle was widowed. We were immediately suspicious and even contacted an attorney, but the uncle and his late wife's sister trusted this group who called themselves a church. This group quickly arranged for a housekeeper/caregiver who the uncle fell for within weeks. Long story short, the uncle was wiped out within a few months and died not long after. The scammers had already disappeared.
Trust no one involved with that woman. Track down and investigate her family and even her friends at the senior center. Good luck!
Just one comment on precautions if Support puts up flyers: don't include anything disparaging as given this woman's aggressiveness, she might turn around and take actions against the family on the basis of libel and/or character defamation. She seems aggressive enough to turn something around against someone and profit from it.
Support, I don't to heighten your anxiety level, but I have a concern about GF's changing of the locks. If he doesn't have a lock box, and anything happens to him that requires emergency treatment, none of the family or even emergency responders would be able to get access without breaking in.
Or perhaps that's part of the Black Widow's plan. I'm not intending to be maudlin or add additional levels of anxiety, but, honestly, every time I think about this post it really bothers me that someone can go after someone and block out family contact so completely. This woman is some kind of determined criminal.
I keep thinking of the movie of the same name; in that case the BW changed her hair color, name, and created fictitious backgrounds every time she found a new mark.
I'm wondering if the Senior Center Black Widiw has a criminal history in other states.
Did your grandpa properly revoke the POA? Did he do it in writing, have it signed by you in front of a notary public, and have it delivered to the attorney and third parties? I'm not an attorney but I know it's not as easy as just tearing up the paper.
I can't believe that HE changed the locks. Maybe he PAID for it but I cannot imagine that it was your grandpa's idea. Regardless - what's done is done. Now we have to figure out ways to help you get inside his house again or to get him out of the house long enough to talk some sense into him.
A few ideas. Throw a party in memory of grandma. Maybe that will snap him out of it and bring him back to his senses. Surely he wouldn't bring her to it and if he did it's the perfect time to have a family intervention.
The town owns the senior center? Write a Letter to the Editor of your local newspapers and tell them your story and how unhelpful officials have been at helping you protect grandpa.
Make flyers and post them all over town - at the grocery store, dry cleaners, hardware store, library, liquor store - with HER face on it asking if anyone knows this woman to call you. Send the flyer to senior centers in neighboring townships because she probably travels within a certain radius to find her victims. While you're at it, send the flyer with a letter to John Walsh, the host of America's Most Wanted.
Is there anyone at the police station you can talk to even if it's just to get a referral to a private investigator?
Is grandpa religious? Was grandma religious??? If so, ask them to help you reach out to grandpa.
You can do all these things while starting the process of going to the courts to get custody. Even if you lose it will eat up a lot of time and bring a lot of unwanted scrutiny to them both and maybe she'll move on.
You're doing the right thing. Don't give up - even if grandpa gives up on you. Keep up the great work!!!!
Meanwhile at Grandpa's, he has changed all the locks on his house. I believe 'she' either convinced him and/or his paranoia/delusions are increasing. He really needs to see a doctor.
I'm wondering if there are any elections in the city this year. Elder fraud might be an interesting topic to address in someone's platform.
I don't know what fraud charges might be different given that she's an individual serial predator, but just to throw out a suggestion... the RICO Act (Racketeer Influenced Corrupt Practices Act) has been used by the Feds to go after serial criminals (read mobsters) and has, I understand, also been expanded to similar crimes. It's my understanding that some individual criminal acts became difficult to prove, but RICO addresses serial crimes, committed as part of a "pattern of crimes." Seems to fit this woman.
And congratulations for pursuing this issue; I think it can be frustrating to be met with such intransigence by people who should be concerned.
I think there's a fine line between being snowed by a scammer and not being able to determine that a scam is taking place. Maybe it is time for guardianship.
One other thing you might try is to have GP ask her how she plans to take care of him if/when he becomes unable to walk, is incontinent, and needs 24/7 care.
Maybe you can even leverage that concept - create a document for her to sign to agree to provide care for him and ask him to have her sign it. Maybe if you explain that you and the family won't be able to do this if his funds are given away, so he'll have to rely on her.
I honestly wouldn't believe anything this woman says, including that she's allegedly resolved her tax earnings. As a good, honest citizen, I think there's still an obligation to report what you may believe is fraud against the government - that's a realistic way of viewing the situation.
I'd be pretty ticked off at the senior center management. Passivity if not blind eye are the terms I would use.
You know, there will come a time when he needs physical assistance, and I'm guessing she isn't even going to be there to take him to a doctor or ER. But he needs to see this for himself. Sometimes that painful moment is the wake-up moment.
Thanks for the update, and please keep us posted. And yes, go for the PI. Maybe one of the local police officers can recommend one.
About her finances, she brings in $1600 a month (pension?) and after bills, she has $600 remaining which she uses for gambling as she has told grandpa. From what we understand, coming from her, is that she has resolved all tax issues. I did find a form online with the IRS to report tax fraud (IE - unreported gambling wins). Grandpa feels threatened by his family's intervention. I am feel it just pushes him more closer to her. We've threatened her but she won't budge. She has a firm mental grip on him. We make attempts to help him but it always escalated and in the end, she wins. She revealed her cards. She has convinced him that his family is no good for him. we spoke with the director of the senior center in full detail yesterday. They are very passive and say they will 'keep a lookout for her'. I like the suggestion of reaching out to the financial contributors. This is an issue and other seniors there are aware of it. On two accounts, she has been described as a money chaser/scammer/gold digger by attendees at the center.
We told grandpa that if he just stopped giving her money, she'll go away eventually. But, he won't. I told the family that maybe they need to have a whole family intervention with him: Choose Your family or her. But I know, it's going to be hard for them (his children particularly) to 'lose' another parent. They really are still grieving hard for her loss. It was exactly a year ago yesterday that we found out about her brain tumor:-(
I pulled up court records on her yesterday. Only speeding tickets found under one name. I'll really like to find her children! Reason 100 for a PI. On to find the senior center financial contributors...........