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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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She will not tell us the last time she went to the drs. She won’t give us a name. We found some paperwork with a drs name on it and when we called they could not give us any information! I’m scared and don’t know where to start
Has you mom been formally diagnosed with dementia? If your mom has not listed you or any other family member on her medical forms as people that information can be given to then they legally can not tell you anything. A visit to an Elder Care Attorney and setting in motion obtaining guardianship would be necessary. The question is ...if you are not a close family is there any one that would assume Guardianship? If not then the Court would appoint a Guardian. If that happens you do not get a say in her care, where she lives. If she has not been formally diagnosed then there is nothing that you can do at this point. It would be a wait until you have to get her to the ER or the ER calls you (if she gives them your information)
Talk to an elder lawyer about your options. You are not likely to get a POA as she sounds to not be logical and compos mentis, so you could go for guardianship or if you are not a close family apply for a court appointed guardian to take the worry and burden from you all. In which case they will make the decisions and not consult you - but for some people that is the best choice to get the best care for a family member.
Its probably too late to get POA. It has to be assigned by Mom and she is not competent to make that decision. You will need to get guardianship and it can be expensive. I think Medicaid allows u to use Moms money but can't get that until you are guardian.
Sorry, no one will talk to you without POA or guardiansip.
You can't make plans without knowing if she already did. She should have a POA, Will/Trust, Healthcare Proxy - just ask her and see her reaction. Tell her you want to make sure she is well cared for if anything happens to either of you. Explain it's in her best interest for you to know what her wishes are. Perhaps you can enlist the help of one of her friends to talk to her about sharing some important health info with her family. Check her calendar, elders often write their appointments down on it. Unfortunately if she is mentally competent, there's not much more you can do. You say you're not a close family - maybe in working on getting closer, she will open up in time.
It is your mother's choice whether to include you in her end of life plans.
If she has already been diagnosed with dementia, it is likely too late for her to sign a Power of Attorney.
If you feel it is unsafe for her to live alone, the next time she goes to the hospital, tell the discharge planners that she is unsafe at home and that you cannot be her caregiver. They will find her placement.
If you don't have the authority to direct her care and to spend her money on caregivers, you should not (iMO) try to direct her care. That way lies madness.
If she has any ability mentally wise it would be best to try and be as frank as possible. If she continues to refuse to include you then you need to tell her your hands are tied and she will end up without your input or care and will have to deal with strangers taking over which may prove more frightening. She has made this choice earlier on to not include you. I know this may sound harsh but you have no other choice and why drive yourself crazy when there is nothing you can do.
Your profile states your mom has Alzheimer’s/dementia. Has this been diagnosed by a doctor? Has anyone been placed as POA for healthcare and financial decisions?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If your mom has not listed you or any other family member on her medical forms as people that information can be given to then they legally can not tell you anything.
A visit to an Elder Care Attorney and setting in motion obtaining guardianship would be necessary.
The question is ...if you are not a close family is there any one that would assume Guardianship? If not then the Court would appoint a Guardian. If that happens you do not get a say in her care, where she lives.
If she has not been formally diagnosed then there is nothing that you can do at this point. It would be a wait until you have to get her to the ER or the ER calls you (if she gives them your information)
Sorry, no one will talk to you without POA or guardiansip.
If she has already been diagnosed with dementia, it is likely too late for her to sign a Power of Attorney.
If you feel it is unsafe for her to live alone, the next time she goes to the hospital, tell the discharge planners that she is unsafe at home and that you cannot be her caregiver. They will find her placement.
If you don't have the authority to direct her care and to spend her money on caregivers, you should not (iMO) try to direct her care. That way lies madness.