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Dementia is a lose-lose situation for ALL concerned. Everyone suffers when a loved one is lost to the ravages of it. In reality, you lost your "husband", the man you knew and married, a long time ago. You grieved that loss, you cried, you raged, you struggled with the decision to place him and only did so when things became too unmanageable at home. You didn't even know this man anymore.

Now he's in Memory Care Assisted Living where most elders struggle and beg to come home. They cry. They play the guilt card HARD and you dread each visit. You leave drained and feeling like a horrible wife. You have a hard time sleeping and staying asleep. It's a vicious cycle that keeps playing out over and over again until you feel like you're being driven insane.

Iinstead, your husband is calm and relaxed in Memory Care because he found companionship. He forgot he was married as the disease destroyed more of his brain every day. You have to witness him holding another woman's hand, but at least he's content, thank God. At least one of you is not losing their serenity 24/7 trying to figure out what to do to make the other happy. He already is.

Part of the 5 Stages of grief is Acceptance. You are grieving the loss of your husband before he actually passes. You'll feel shock/denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally, acceptance. You'll waffle between the stages, back and forth for some time, working your way towards acceptance. In this case, you are working towards acceptance that your husband has found a new companion. Because of his dementia. It's a egregious loss nevertheless. The sooner you can arrive at acceptance, the sooner you'll feel forgiveness for something he's not doing purposely. You'll find happiness in your heart that he has some comfort in his very limited life now.

I pray that is the case for you, and that you can then embark on a life of your own. Yes, do continue to visit your husband and be his advocate and voice which he has lost.

God bless you and give you the grace and courage to see this situation as a blessing for both of you. The best of a bad situation, which IS a blessing where dementia is concerned.
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PeggySue2020 Dec 22, 2024
Lea, you just summed up everything I’ve read about John Connor and Sandra Day O Connor’s relationship.

Sandra used to bring John to work. Then she quit her job. Then she had to place him. She was delighted that John was finally content instead of her worrying about it. When she visited and he was holding the other lady’s hand, she just held his free one.

Thats acceptance.
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I’m sorry for your hurt in this. Your husband definitely needs regular visits while in care. This serves to insure his care is good, the staff sees him as a person who’s valued and cared for, and his family makes sure he is well, safe, clean, and has what he needs. You can decide how often to do this, if you can have others help you do this, how long to stay, and if some of the visits need to be a quick peek around a corner, check in with the staff, and then go. When you leave, go do something you enjoy, like eat ice cream! During my mother’s years in care, we witnessed the staff taking a more active interest in residents whose families visited regularly. It may not be best side of human nature, but it’s still true, when you care, others care. I wish you healing from hurt and peace
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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Of course you DON'T stop visiting your husband, as he is still your husband. He can't help that his brain is broken.
If you're having a hard time with seeing him with someone else perhaps just go once or twice a week.
One of the ladies in my caregiver support group had the same issue as you with her husband. When she would go into his memory care facility, if he was holding the "other" woman's hand, she would just sit on his other side and hold his other hand.
She knew that if he was in his right mind that he would never do such a thing and also found some comfort in the fact that he at least seemed happy in his new home.
May you take comfort in the fact that your husband still loves you despite his broken brain.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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After Sandra Day o Connor’s husband went into a facility, she visited him while he was holding another woman’s hand. And the way she saw it was that at least he wasn’t lonely.
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While it is good to know that love comes even to the elderly, it's sad when this happens and it is very common. My Aunt's friend had this happen. She visited him because SHE herself wished to do so. And because her visits were not in any way "disturbing" to her husband, who simply introduced his new friend as his girlfriend, and his wife as another friend.

So it is entirely up to her. She can comfort himself that he is already for most intent and purpose gone. And she need not visit, but should check in with caregivers to make certain he isn't asking for her. She can move on with her life if that's what she wishes to do.
And on the other hand she can visit if she wishes to.

At some point, quite honestly, were I in her place? This would be a GREAT COMFORT to me, odd as that may sound.

You don't give us details here so we are left really to tell you she should do exactly as she wishes to do. She may in fact, wish to divorce at this point and TRULY get on with her life, without having to worry about his division of assets. Tho she should consult an attorney about financial repercussions for him and for her first.
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To me, this is a difficult one, I really don't know how I would react day to day.

I guess I would continue to visit weekly for a few hours and leave it at that. He has built a new life, I would start rebuilding mine, spending more time with friends and family.

When one is a caregiver for a long period of time, they lose themselves, might be time for you to start a new chapter in the book of your life.

Sending support your way, I am so sorry about this.
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I am feeling jealousy even though I know it’s the disease. I guess he thinks she is me. She wants to be near him all the time. He chooses to spend a great deal of time with her.
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MG8522 Dec 21, 2024
I have seen this in memory care. I think, with the memory issues, it can literally be a case of "out of sight, out of mind." I think he is holding on to the comfort and love and security that you shared in your marriage, and is transferring it to someone who is physically present the way you always were. So in that way it is a compliment, that he wants to hold on to that. But yes, the circumstances and brain confusion change who he senses his partner to be. It must be a devastating feeling. I don't have any advice except to realize that it is not anything you or he can control. He isn't deliberately and consciously choosing her over you. But it is an additional layer of grief to have to process for you. I'm very, very sorry.
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This must be very hard to witness. I'm so sorry. I wouldn't visit as often, maybe one or two times a month. You have new found freedom now that your husband is in memory care. Try to figure out how to rebuild your life. I wish you all the best.
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Reply to Hothouseflower
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We need much more information:

1. How do you feel about this / his feelings/behavior towards another woman?
2. How do you feel about visiting him (before this realization) - did you want to visit or did you feel it was your duty / feel guilty if you didn't visit?
3. How did / do you feel since you found this out?
4. How often were you visiting?
5. How is your life now since he is in memory care?
6. How long has he been in memory care?

So much depends on how you understand dementia and how you want to proceed. "Even" if you understand dementia, there is still an emotional component having been married to him for perhaps decades. How was the relationship throughout your marriage?

There is no right or wrong answers / responses here.
Some people may feel it is your 'wifely' duty to visit (I haven't read any responses); others may feel as I do - it is up to you - and, (as) he won't know the difference.

7. Have you dealt with your grief of losing him when his dementia started? when he was admitted into memory care?

8. How old are you? Are you active in your own life? Do you have a social life yourself?

I am not asking these questions to be invasive; they are meant for you to ask yourself and examine your own feelings (which you do not share with us). That you do not provide much information here somewhat confuses me, leading me to ask you more probing questions - which I hope will help you figure how what is best for you.

Gena / Touch Matters
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I am very sorry. This must be very difficult to experience. How are you feeling about it?
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