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My husband and I and our kids moved to another state to help take care of his grandmother who had just been diagnosed with dementia. After a year, we all decided to move and sell her home. We bought a new home and she gave us the down payment and we put the house in my husband's name. She lived with us for the next 4 years. Her dementia had gotten worse and she had a stoke. We did hire help for awhile but then decided it would be best for her to receive full time help in a nursing home. My husband is POA and I'm listed after him as POA if he were to pass away. We took her to the ER and they took her to the nursing home from there. The next day I went and signed the papers to admit her. They never asked about past property. They drug their feet getting her applied for medicade, saying don't worry medicade will back date it. They had to file for an extension at least twice. It took 7 months to hear back from medicade who asked about the sale of the house and then denied her. I researched and then learned about the 5 year look back. All they said was come get her, so we did and brought her back home. She passed away within 2 weeks. I'll always regret putting her there. Now the nursing home is saying I owe for the 7 months because I signed as responsible party. She had SS and a pention and gave it all while she was there. I'm talking to a lawyer on Monday but can they really hold me responsible?

Yes, under the law they can hold you responsible. If there is some way out of this the attorney will know what it is. Meanwhile your letter here admitting that you did these sales of her home and purchase of another home in your own name serves as good warning to others trying to figure their own way forward. I am thinking you are very lucky this was found out about in a timely manner or you could have been liable for a year or more of her care in facility which would have been quite the enormous debt to face down.

Do keep that appointment, hoping against hope that your admission that you had zero idea of all this might help you get a way out OR negotiate a settlement. I am so sorry this happened. They always say that "Ignorance is no excuse before the law" and that's true; it's why Forums like this can be such a help in cautioning people not to make big moves such as sales and buying of real property without knowing what a good elder law attorney can tell them. It's costly, no question; whereas 350.00 an hour seemed horrible just a few years ago it can now run to 700.00 an hour. In the end it's well worth the money to have the knowledge.

I hope you'll update us after your attorney visit and I welcome you to the Forum.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Welcome to the Forum. The first thing you and your husband need to do is reach out to Medicaid AND Medicare if yur lawyer hasn't already, to see who paid for what and when. They will send you written statements showing how much they paid for your husband's grandmother.

Until you have these statements, don't pay them a dime. This is a classic nursing home shakedown. The same thing happened to me when I had to place my parent. I talked to Medicaid and Medicare and it turns out they were owed NOTHING more than I paid them.

The nursing home slipped documents in that you signed under false pretenses because you were told they were admitting forms and forms to bill Medicare and Medicaid. These documents will never hold up if your case gets into court because any lawyer will make short work of it. The nursing home is counting on you and your husband being afraid to go into court so you'll pay up and question nothing. They will make all kinds of threats and will harass you all the time because they don't want to take it into court. They just want a quiet payday. Don't give them one.

Don't be afraid to take it before a judge. The same thing happened to me and I didn't have a lawyer. I explained to the judge what they pulled and showed the court the statements from Medicare and Medicaid proving that the nursing home was owed nothing. It was determined that they had been overpaid by me and the judge ordered that they refund back the over payment.

Don't be afraid of these people and don't be afraid of court. Also the nursing home can't "summon" you or anyone else anywhere. Only the court can summon someone because a Summons is a legal proceeding. A Summons is served to you in person by a sheriff.

What you will have to show up for is a hearing before the probate court judge. The court is not responsible to send someone to let you know when. The other party (nursing home) is. So a popular nursing home fraud tactic is that they have their legal department ensure that you don't receive the necessary paperwork until AFTER the hearing. Then you lose by default for not showing up.

Make sure you check the court docket weekly to make sure you don't miss your appearance at the hearing. Don't even leave this up to your lawyer. You make sure to double check.

You and your husband will be fine. Don't let these people shakedown your family for more. Don't pay them one penny unless the judge rules it. Good luck.
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Reply to BurntCaregiver
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Softballmom123, welcome to the forum. So sorry for the passing of your Grandmother-in-law. From what you wrote, sounds like Grandmother was denied Medicaid because she gave you and your husband a down payment on your house. It was nice of her to do that, but later down the road it came back to bite her, and you. I can understand Medicaid doing that, because Medicaid is funded by us taxpayers.


When you signed the papers for your Grandmother at the nursing home, do you recall if you signed ___ your name___/POA? Without the POA added to the signature line, that made you responsible for any bills that Medicaid doesn't pay. I know this is something that rarely people talk about (the using of POA on a signature line). When I had to put my Mom in a skilled nursing facility, I remember the Admin asked if I was the POA, and when I said yes, she said for my to add POA after my signature. Nursing homes are expensive. My Dad was paying $12k a month for my Mom.


So sorry you are going through this.
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Reply to freqflyer
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If you signed as "responsible party" that usually includes language that indicates that you will be responsible for the bill.

Do you have the contract?
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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BurntCaregiver Sep 27, 2024
@Barb

If the OP signed documents under false pretenses because the nursing home administrator/social worker lied and said they were something else, that's fraud.

Nursing homes aren't getting away with this kind of fraud or the obscene shakedowns for money as much as they used to. People, courts, and Medicaid/Medicare have wised up and made progress with catching on to nursing home scams and frauds.
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The lawyer will give you the accurate answer. Laws may differ by state and this is a global forum caregivers and receivers.
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