Her husband is fully incontinent, unable to walk without assistance. He falls a lot and is unable to get up without assistance (911).
my mother refuses to place him and is in denial of her inability to properly care for him. They both live at home but are in another state.
ive had numerous heart to heart conversations with her. I’ve offered her and him to live with my husband and I. We even had an elevator put in our new home for their use. I have plenty of facilities/nursing homes near me that will care for her husband. She refuses all. She has had to call 911 twice this month to get help to get her husband up. She just fell three days ago and refuses to go to the e.r.
I am at my wits end, depressed/stressed all the time. Short of calling protective services, are there any other options?
My Father in law has no family and he is the step parent. I feel like you are the one who cares for them.....you have a good heart, but this will take its toll on you. Time to at least get some help. Hospice bills the insurance company. so she will not see a bill.
If mom is of sound mind and has POA, then there is effectively nothing you can do but stand by and watch the show.
It's awful, I know, but you cannot force her to place her husband and as long as mom is OK, your POA isn't worth much.
Just keep in touch with them and do what you can from a distance. I'm so sorry.
they do not have a close relationship with him, each visit ends in a fight which is sooo stressful to mom. They live in different states but have only come to see their dad about 3 times in the last 15 or so years.