Hospice is placing my 78 year old dear mom on morphine and anti-anxiety meds as needed. She refuses food and drink some meals (usually when I am not there to feed her), but eats and drinks with me, with difficulty swallowing even her pureed foods.
Can some of you tell me what I can expect regarding time mom has left here on earth, based upon your experience? I know it is hard to tell - but hearing similar stories will help me process what Mom's going through.
I had to almost throw a fit to get this care for Mom... she'd been coughing and rattling for weeks. They tried the patch and atropine and both didn't work. Nebulizer and oxygen as well - but no real difference in mom's breathing difficulty. I had to insist more comfort care for her - through tears - and so now the next level of care is being instituted - morphine and anti-anxiety meds.
Just thinking about Mom's plight brings me to tears... but I am joyful because she's going to heaven and I will see her again.
This is rather emotional for me...
And sometimes, getting that pain relieved, means the person can relax and let go.
I feel so sad that you experienced this; it is so hard to sit watching someone die, wanting to be with them for each possible moment, to help and comfort them....then not be there when they do go.
Morphine can be seen as 'expediting death' in some circumstances.
But it is primarily used, and authorized to be used for, stopping pain...though, for many, it fails to stop pain...instead, stupefying them into inability to speak to say they are still 'in there', and hurting. When doses of morphine seem to be failing to control pain, there need to be other remedies to help that, be it other drugs, or sometimes alternative measures.
I found I was doing some things wrong for my husband.... You might too.
Be kind to yourself.