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My grannie had a baby (doll) and she held it and rocked it, talked to it, checked her diaper, changed clothes and just adored her.

We would go to the thrift store and get new outfits and make a fuss over the baby. It worked for us.

However, your mom may find it insulting that you give her a baby doll. You say she is delusional most of the time and not in memory care, has she been assessed lately to ensure that she is getting the proper level of care? I worry about delusions causing fear and that their is someone close to reassure her if that happens. Anyway, you really just have to try and try until you find the solution for her.

Maybe a stuffed animal that needs care for a while? If the baby doesn't fly.

Best of luck, it is challenging.
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Isthisrealyreal, Thanks for replying and sharing. Mom's delusions are believing that my dad is at work (he died in 2010) and believing that both her parents are alive (they died years ago). She also believes she lives in a big house, which is actually the AL facility. She still talks about going back home. She is not in MC because she is not a flight risk, at this time, but will be moved into MC should she try to leave. She was reassessed about 3 weeks ago with the diagnosis being stage 6. I just want to do something to help her, it that's even possible. Thank you for your stuffed animal suggestion. I have seen other ALZ patients with stuffed animals instead of dolls. It's just so hard trying to do what's best for her.
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I was going to buy one of those expensive dolls that look like a real baby, etc. but the shipment kept getting delayed so I went to Toys R Us found a doll for under $30 and it worked great.  Check out the toy stores before spending a lot of money.
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Jessica40, Thank you for sharing. I'll check the toy stores before I spend a small fortune on something that may not work.
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I would LOVE to receive the GIFT of a beautiful, durable doll with a wardrobe and even perhaps a tea set or some “care” tools.
If someone were to say to me “I thought this doll was SO DELIGHTFUL, and it reminded me of when you taught me how to take care of my toys (collected dolls....told Aunt Marion you loved her doll collection.... whatever you think might entice her interest) when I was a child. I couldn’t wait for you to see it. Let me leave ‘her’ with you for a day or two to decorate your room”, I’d be delighted.
Then leave it, and observe if/how she utilizes it. Don’t define the new addition to her room by your terms, but let Mom define it by her terms.
If Mom seems to be relating to the doll, ask her what her name is, or if she stays her room and so on.
May or may not work, but this is dementia. See if Mom will choose to engage!
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katydid1 Nov 2019
AnneReid,
What a lovely, thoughtful way to present it!! I LOVE this idea.
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Great idea! I wouldn't present it to her. Let her discover it. Get the little basinette. Lay the doll in it and just be patient for the reaction. And do not get disappointed if mom does not bond with the doll. She may not like it or she may warm to it immediately. Just be patient and don't force it. Watch from a distance, no anxiety for you either. Do not over think this.
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Gladimhere,

Thank you for your encouragement. I think giving the doll to her as a gift to decorate her room is a wonderful way to present it to her.
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It’s a wonderful idea and definitely worth a try. Just don’t overthink it. “Mom, look at what we received today!” Show her and then let her take it from there. Even if she is not initially receptive, she may be later on as her cognitive status declines. It sounds like she wants to feel useful and productive. Perhaps you can talk to someone at the AL about letting her assist with activities, folding washcloths, setting tables...something that can be her “job.” Hope it works out and please update us!
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Canoe63,

Thank you for replying and for encouraging me through this idea. I have talked to the AL director about a "job" for Mom and nothing yet. Mom's attention span is so short that I doubt she can stay focused on anything for more than a minute or less.
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A friend’s Mom living in Memory Care had a whole collection of baby dolls in a basket by her rocking chair. She spent hours rocking her babies. She had them named after her children, even though she no longer recognized her children when they came to visit. Others were named after her nieces and nephews.
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Thank you, Becky04474, for sharing. Mom isn't in MC, yet. But I'm hopeful a doll will help with her boredom. I'm just not sure how to present it to her. She is delusional most of the time, which is why I think a doll may help. I'm looking for any ideas that will fill her day. The activities where she lives don't hold her attention for long. She gets up and heads back to her room. Thanks, again.
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Getting your mom a baby doll to care for is an EXCELLENT idea! Many dementia and Alzheimer's residents where I work (in a Memory Care community) carry around their baby dolls & get a tremendous amount of comfort from doing so. Be sure to get a blanket to swaddle her in as well.

I hope it works!! Good luck
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AbbyRose Nov 2019
Thank you for your encouraging comment. Mom is not in MC, yet. But, I do believe she will be comforted with a doll. I'm just not sure how to present it to her. Do I carry the doll in wrapped in a pretty blanket and show it to her, and then leave without it? Even though she is delusional, she will know that it is a babydoll. But, then again, she may be delighted. Ugh! What to do.
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