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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
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III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I try deflecting and say I'll talk to them - but I get 20-25 calls a day complaining to me about staff stealing jewelry, food, clothes, etc. I usually find things hidden in her room but its becoming constant and exhausting.
The only thing that finally helped my Mom with her UTIs was giving her a low dose antibiotic everyday. The doctor should be able to help you find a solution as it is different with every body.
Yes, try to limit the amount of phone calls that you're getting, that's what I have had to do. I'm hated for it too. Your mom is going through the exact same thing that mine is. It will wear on you, trust me. I'm sorry, I know this is super tough. We just have to protect our own sanity.
UTIs are also caused by not being able to void completely. It has been suggested here to help with that, have the person lean forward to help. Also, have her sit a little longer. As we women age out bladder tends to drop making it harder to void.
I agree that the first course of action is to pursue diagnosing and curing her current UTI. Once she is clear you can purchase D-Mannose on amazon but you will need to have her medical team to give it to her faithfully every day. It helped my MIL a great deal -- didn't stop them 100% but cut the occurrences down by more than half. UTIs in elderly women have more to do with changes in physiology than about hygiene or the amount of liquids she drinks. An infection can create dementia-like confusion and behavior changes which can be addressed with antibiotics and she should return to an improved pre-infection cognitive state.
I also agree that you should not answer all those calls -- there is no point since answering them and talking to her is not remembered, it is unfruitful. Also, if she is using a personal phone book to call people I would remove that for the time being as she may be calling other people telling them inappropriate things at inappropriate times of the day and night, as my MIL was doing. Or make sure that the only number in her phone is yours (for now).
This Sunday while I was at a dinner party I got a text from a relative saying that she was sorry to hear "about Donna" and do I have more details about "what happened" (Donna is a recently discovered half-sister of mine who lives several states away and we were just getting to know each other). As it turns out, a very elderly mutual Aunt of ours was calling and telling people she read about Donna's death in the papers. None of this was true and it was surely traumatizing to me at the moment. I can give more examples, like when my MIL was calling her long-time friend in Hawaii (a far different time zone) and waking her at all hours. With short-term memory impairment, telling my MIL to not call her didn't work so we had to take her phone book away, which made us so sad. I wish you success in helping your mom get back to her best health.
Do you feel you must take the calls? I would limit the number of calls I would accept. Are you the only person she is calling? Could you reduce the number of items she has in her space so that it is easier for her to find things? This number of calls sounds very stressful for both of you. I think I’d try to get a camera installed to see what is going on.
Ask her doctor if there is a medication she can take.
The UTIs...has she been in the hospitals on IV for them? If it hasn't been done before, the next time she has a UTI have a culture done. Drs usually give broad spectrum antibiotics hoping they clear up. With a culture you know exactly what bacteria is causing the problem so the correct antibiotic will be given. My Mom was given cranberry tablets and a probiotic everyday to help with her UTIs. The last year she was alive, she had no UTI's. A couple of members swear by D-Mannose to help with UTIs
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I also agree that you should not answer all those calls -- there is no point since answering them and talking to her is not remembered, it is unfruitful. Also, if she is using a personal phone book to call people I would remove that for the time being as she may be calling other people telling them inappropriate things at inappropriate times of the day and night, as my MIL was doing. Or make sure that the only number in her phone is yours (for now).
This Sunday while I was at a dinner party I got a text from a relative saying that she was sorry to hear "about Donna" and do I have more details about "what happened" (Donna is a recently discovered half-sister of mine who lives several states away and we were just getting to know each other). As it turns out, a very elderly mutual Aunt of ours was calling and telling people she read about Donna's death in the papers. None of this was true and it was surely traumatizing to me at the moment. I can give more examples, like when my MIL was calling her long-time friend in Hawaii (a far different time zone) and waking her at all hours. With short-term memory impairment, telling my MIL to not call her didn't work so we had to take her phone book away, which made us so sad. I wish you success in helping your mom get back to her best health.
Could you reduce the number of items she has in her space so that it is easier for her to find things?
This number of calls sounds very stressful for both of you.
I think I’d try to get a camera installed to see what is going on.
The UTIs...has she been in the hospitals on IV for them? If it hasn't been done before, the next time she has a UTI have a culture done. Drs usually give broad spectrum antibiotics hoping they clear up. With a culture you know exactly what bacteria is causing the problem so the correct antibiotic will be given. My Mom was given cranberry tablets and a probiotic everyday to help with her UTIs. The last year she was alive, she had no UTI's. A couple of members swear by D-Mannose to help with UTIs