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Imho, as no one person is perfect, of course it is normal to sometimes become impatient.
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Is it normal to become impatient with your parents? Are you kidding? Haven't you read the posts on this site?

MOST of us are frustrated and impatient. That's why we vent here. If you need an understanding group of caregivers who are going through what you are going through, then consider joining the Alzheimer's/Dementia Caregiver's Support Group on Facebook. You will find plenty of frustrated and impatient people who will listen and support you.
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(sorry this is posted 3945849 times!! the reply box was at the bottom but it was posting at the top! I'm trying to delete them)
Absolutely! That's why I'm here right now! I refuse to give in to my father's paranoia that he's being watched by his apartment complex. and he keeps pushing it . he bought a ring camera and what he wants to do with it, wont' work. I'm trying to talk him out of it by saying you can't turn it off and on when you want to use it. you can't take battery out and put it back in. (it will always want to update). He never leaves the house except for MAYBE once a month. I have no desire to enable him. He just told me "But I'd rather you come over". so all my reasons didn't work. now i have to tell him "I'd rather not" in a way that doesn't peeve him off but he'll get mad anyway because most people who want someone to enable them usually do. gggggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr lol
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I am guessing he has dementia........maybe just put it back again where you had it.  And yes.......I get frustrated with my mom (93).....she has some hearing loss.......and there are times when I am talking to her and all of a sudden she will ask or tell me something out of the blue so I know either (1) she didn't hear me talking (2) or she wasn't paying attention.........so sometimes I just stop talking and try to move on......but it makes me frustrated that I try to do so much in making sure she has food to eat, pay the bills, take to appointments, visit every day to get mail/paper in yet my brother who only lives 1/2 hour away (retired) can only manage to come up maybe 2 times a month for 2 hours each time......yippee that's 4 hours a month.......and maybe he might get her paper in and bring her up a sandwich........however, it sounds like your father might have some dementia going on and he moves things around either to frustrate you OR just because he wants to and doesn't know why.  Don't feel guilty......we all have been there.......wishing you luck
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Yes. Yes. Yes. why wouldn’t you? Your life role has changed, you have grief for your losses and for your parent’s decline.

I sanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. You may need to adjust your expectations or remove items for awhile depending on the situation.

Remember, he sees you as his child, not an authority figure. You will have to make things seem as his idea if you want to have the possibility of him changing his behavior.
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I feel so very guilty about getting frustrated with my Mom or irritated. She can’t help it, it’s the dementia. And yet I find that I lose my cool. Not by yelling at her or anything, I wait until I come back home 1/2 mile up the street to my house. My Mom can get so stubborn and she hard hearing and refuses to wear her hearing aids. I honestly think I need to learn how to meditate so I don’t get so frustrated. Plus, maybe take one of my anxiety pills. I just wanted to let you know you were not along in that.
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Operator Dec 2020
Thank you so much. All this feedback assures me of my doubts.
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Unfortunately, seems all the time...
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My father was diagnosed with the first stages of dementia in mid-2014. He is a healthy, educated man in his eighties but not a practical or hands-on type of persona. He has not progressed whatsoever, and I sometimes wonder if he was incorrectly diagnosed. He is an introvert who has always been very stubborn and set in his ways, a perfectionist but stern calm man. When I ask him to do something, he purposely looks at me and does the opposite or waits till I am gone. I then become frustrated and overwhelmed and may reply in an impatient tone of voice, feeling frustrated. I can be a nagger, I admit and bossy also only for trying to do my best. I am far from perfect, and maybe I need to let go and stop trying to control everything. All of this after eats me up inside for days, then leaving me to feel overwhelming guilt with sleepless nights. I do appreciate all your feedback immensely.
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Toomush Dec 2020
It's awfully easy to get short and bitter dealing with aging parents. My mother (98), mostly blind, somewhat deaf, and very short term memory impaired, moved in with us from the nursing home last year before the pandemic. I had a hard time with the idea that I was taking care of her, when she was mostly not there for me, growing up. But my wife, an otherwise good caretaker (we cared for both her parents through their illnesses and eventual demise) has a terrible time with the fact that my mother will not say "please." She'll say "thank you", after, but couches all her requests for help in a kind of passive-aggressive manner that seems slightly sarcastic and supercilious. She has always done this, and has never in her life admitted that she was ever wrong or ever did anything wrong. It drives my wife nuts. Once in a while, I'll point out that Mom is 98, mentally impaired and will never change, but the fight goes on. I've learned to stay out of it. Maybe it's good for both of them?
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