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Wow, you have a LOT going on! Sorry for your dad's passing. I take it your mom is back on her feet?

So sorry about your husband! Can you get some help ASAP? What can you pay someone to do? Clean your house? That's a pretty easy one. Meal prep? Stay with hubby for a few hours so you can catch a break? Please do it. You're burnt out and need help. Have any friends or family offered to help? If so, take them up on it. I've seen things set up on websites for bringing meals, etc.

I'm assuming a terminal brain cancer diagnosis comes with a rather short life expectancy? I don't know, just guessing. And no matter what they estimate, it can be much shorter or longer. Is the cancer being aggressively treated with something like chemo (guessing since you're taking him to the doc a lot)?

Hopefully you have all his legal affairs in order. Living will, POA, etc.

Depending on a lot of variables, your husband might want to switch to palliative or hospice care. Switching the focus to quality of life (and pain management) vs taking heroic measures to extend life even if the quality is pretty horrible.

Don't freak out about his mom. So what if she hates you? I assume you've been dealing with this for quite some time. Just think - his funeral will be the last time you EVER have to see her. Keep that in mind and just politely ignore her. Don't let her get to you.

I think you might benefit from trying a therapist to get some support for this tough situation. Your stress level must be off the charts.

Good luck.
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HelenaH Jan 2022
Thank you so much for your kind reply. Regarding his prognosis, he was given 12-18 months in September 2021. He has completed radiation and chemo. The doctors hope it may give him an additional 4 months. My mother is slowly making progress. I worry she will not be able to live without him. They married when she was 18 and had a wonderful 57 year marriage. I’ve been able to step back a bit from being her caregiver to concentrate on husband. But she still calls me crying and it is hard because to this day no one has asked how I’m dealing with Dad’s death and if I’m ok.
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