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Get home care help ASAP. I thought you answered your own question with the line “everything my parents owned will be mine when my stepdad dies”

why is this? Why are 6 other children being left nothing?

if you are financial POA you could sell the house and place him in care
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You say: "I promised my mom I would take care of him if she went first and I will."

And so you will. INDEED you will. This man was precious to your mother who was precious to you.

So... where in that promise does it say that you, yourself, will take on the work of the four to seven people needed to meet your stepfather's level of care?

The four absent bio daughters - are they refusing to participate or has it not even occurred to them?
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You need a plan.

Step 1. Call the local Area Agency on Aging tomorrow and ask for a "needs assessment". You need a professional assessment of what level of care your step dad needs.

Step 2. Gather information about step dads resources. Pension, SS, CDs, IRAs etc. Figure out what his income stream is. Ask the AAA for help in determining what his eligibility is for public funding like Medicaid.

Step 3. Gather YOUR resources. Resume, financial resources, friends you can stay with temporarily, real estate agency. You need a plan to re-launch yourself and your career.

Step 4. Have a talk with yourself. Have this talk with a therapist if you need to, but get it through to your innermost self that destroying your own life and future security is NOT what your mother asked you to do when she said "take care of stepdad".

She meant "make sure he's cared for, has a place to live and decent medical care". She did NOT mean "impoverish yourself, destroy your future and abandon all hopes and dreams of a normal life".

Your stepfather may need (and be able to afford enough in home care for you to go back to work. Or me may need placement in a skilled nursing facility and require Medicaid funding to fund that. Either way, YOUR job is to manage his care and to advocate for him. You'll have plenty to do, believe me.
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