My grandpa is 94 years old and he has a super high sexual drive.This is very problematic because 1) my grandma died 19 years ago 2) My grandpa refuses to marry another woman but keep harassing (both orally and physically) caregivers we hired. Sex is almost the only thing he can think of everyday besides other basic needs. My dad is managing his money and gives him a small portion for daily expenses but he spends all the money right away on women.
He has most of the bad behaviors one might see in the elderly such as bad hygiene, abuse, etc., but his brain is clear most of time since he can read newspapers, watch TV, communicate with people normally.
His harassment to the in-house caregivers has driven away at least 20 of them and it becomes really hard to find substitutes. It's impossible to let him live alone because of his old age and serious heart conditions as well as stroke risks.
Me and my parents are desperate, any one has any idea of how to cope with it?
Pam's idea of the wooden spoon to the penis is tempting but could get the caregiver in a lot of trouble. The best thing is to totally ignore it and tell him to put it away. If he does not then leave the room and do not provide any further service till he behaves or call the police and file a complant. Do not yell or argue just warn him of the consequences and follow through. caregivers have to be prepared to deal with this kind of situation and if the family does not provide support they are with the wrong client.
Bamboo I realize you are worried about your parents but you are not responsible for grandpa they are. It may be hazardous to their marriage to continue in this way but your mother is complaining to the wrong person. she needs to sit down with her husband and the two of them figure out the reason he chooses not to come home when he is in town. If you have a live in caregiver let her do the job she is paid for. Dad does not need to be babysiting. it sounds to me that there is more going on here than Gpa's inappropriate sexual behaviour. This really is not your problem. You are a young wife and your attention should be on supporting your hubby while he finishes his education and takes those all important final exams. it is a very stressful time for him he does not need this diversion. Been there done that I married a medical student.
The treatment today for grandpa is female hormones, or possibly saw palmetto. Saw palmetto is estrogenic and should not be taken by women.