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As stated above: "Siblings feel she can make decisions for herself. She has dementia but is not declared of incapacity."

That might be something else to consider, but until it has been Rhonda's mother calls the shots.
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Thank you Countrymouse and Martha627-
I have financial POA. My brother who lives very close has medical POA but is afraid to execute any authority. My mother was determined by psychiatrist within 6 months to still have the capacity to make her own decisions with assistance. Like, what the h*ll does that mean? They don't want to make waves is my best guess!
So, little happens without me other than my mother giving money to my siblings and their children. I cannot stop it because there is no evidence. If I install cameras the money gifting would happen under a table in another room. I am not confident that I could watch 24/7 in order to catch a thief. I have limited resources and time; I am primary care giver for my adult son with disability. I think you are right that it is a waiting game and maybe I am impatient with all the needs from others.On the other hand, I am really ready to slam the phone down and just move her myself and take over her finances. But, I do not have medical POA so how would that play out?
This is really helpful to hear others with similar and different situations. There is no right answer without a crystal ball. Keep your thoughts coming friends; I appreciate it all.
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Rhonda, truly I understand the tongue-swallowing frustration of all this. With your mother's cash gifts, could you make any headway approaching your siblings and the grandchildren and pointing out to them the sheer unethical lousiness of taking money from their elderly loved one? The difficulty is that as long as your mother is doing this willingly and 'knowingly' (Gawd help us), even if you catch them in the act you can't stop her.

I'll tell you what though. What you can do is add up, and keep records, and perhaps - using neutral terms and keeping your face as calm as possible - get them together and confront them with the accumulated sums they've taken from her.

Again, though: if their comeback is that she wanted to give them the money, and doing so makes her happy, and who are they to refuse? - then I don't know the answer.
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Thanks Countrymouse-
We did just that. One sibling says his kids are on their own and he can't control if his daughters take Grandma shopping for groceries for her and new boots for themselves ($150/pair). And he at first denied taking any money, then said exactly as you say "Mom likes to give more money to one of her children/grandchildren and you are just jealous." Now that sibling is in denial again and acting like other problems are of more concern; that I didn't thank him for arranging the pool service to clean mom's pool when it is so he can have mom pay for his pool cleaning service!
How miserable can you be to pray upon your mother to pay for cleaning your crap!
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