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This is a difficult situation; I'm not sure there are any good ways to go about verifying what the real situation is, but hopefully these suggestions might help

I'm wondering why your cousin would have been told by your father that you had a trust fund, but your father didn't tell you. I assume you were on good terms with your father? When did your cousin tell you this?

Have you checked with the local county Probate Court to determine if any will was filed on behalf of your father? If so, see if you can get a copy; read it and look for terms of "pour-over" and "trust". If there was a trust, the will should mention that it was created in conjunction with a trust document.

If there is a filed will, and no mention of it in the trust, then either there isn't one or the will was one of those on-line boiler plates or drafted by someone who wasn't a competent estate planning attorney.

Sometimes (in the US) estate planning documents are prepared on "pleading paper", with the name of the law firm vertically on the left hand side. If there's any such name, contact the law firm. They might or might not provide any information, depending on the firm and the situation (i.e., if there is a trust, and you're addressed in it, they might tell you because of your inherited interest).

Without prying, did your father has extensive assets, and/or are you in need of special funding, such as a special needs trust for medical issues? Was he caring for you prior to his death because of any such medical needs?

What assets did your father have? Did your mother dispose of them? What caused the friction with your mother? It seems as though there are some family dynamics at play here because they are affecting open and clear communication between the two of you - I'm not blaming anyone, just stating the obvious "elephant in the room."

What about living arrangements and otherwise family communication status? Are you regularly in contact with your mother on other issues or has there been the friction( to which you alluded) for some time?

I'm assuming by your use of "mum" and "solicitors" that you're in the UK, or country which similarly uses those terms. The legal situation and who you might contact to determine if a will was filed may be different, so hopefully our friends to the North and across the Big Pond will offer more specific information on post-death proceedings in your country.
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