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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I have found out that it best not to give too much information it cause them to repeatably think about important issue. Wait until about a hour before you go that enough time for them to deal with issue. then it will soon be over and done. You can't dump lots of things on them or you will be explaining and answering question over and over.
My father does this too. Has even laid awake all night before someone is coming the next morning to pick him up for church as he is afraid he won't get up in time--even when I'm the one who always wakes him up!! He constantly asks when he us going someplace, or when someone is coming. His latest obsession ( it changes every week) is asking over and over about going to the local college so he can sign up for a certificate course on fetal alcohol syndrome ... a course that he couldn't possibly take since he barely can comprehend anything he is reading. The good news is that now he is obsessed about wanting to go into an assisted living place when a month before he adamantly refused. So he has finally come to terms (on some level) that he needs help on a level that we can't provide; specifically, that he needs socialization.,
Anyway, the calendar idea is good. I do that. Even better is to write upcoming events on a whiteboard, then just say look at the board AND the calendar. I also try not to tell him in advance about upcoming events or I will be asked about it all week or weeks...over and over and over. HIQEVER, sometimes I do want to tell him in advance IF the particular event is hinging on hope--meaning it is an appointment that will actually allay his considerable anxiety over something he is afraid will or won't happen.
Yes, very common. OCD. Two of your earlier responders said write it on a big calendar or just don't tell him.
I have now had two years of experience with a 95 year old mother who has very mild dementia. I just don't tell her. She would just drive me crazy prior to any appointment. It took a while to figure it out, but I do not tell her anything in advance.
My husband thinks he will not live out the week - every week - and hopes it will be true. If I tell him that we have a lunch date with one of the children, in two days, he begins to lay out his shirt and asks if his pants are OK for this date. I also do not inform him until about three hours before the due time of the lunch date.. It must be pretty common for these afflicted folks..I like the calendar idea - will try that!
Why don't you try writing down the appointments on a huge calendar? I do this so my husband knows what is happening every day and in the week. Then when he forgets and asks me, I say, "Check the calendar".
Yes it is common.. He realizes he is becoming forgetful and anxious that he will forget his appts..
My Mom works herself into a frenzy hours before she needs to leave the house, I have stopped telling her about upcoming events and appts.. She lives with me so I can let her know that day and make sure I give her sufficient time to get ready.
Different patients have different obsessions. For some it is groceries. For others it is Kleenex. The most annoying are those who focus on their own health issues and think they are dying every other minute. Obviously Dad is an organized thinker and struggles to remain so. Encourage him on the first call, but then ignore the phone after that.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Anyway, the calendar idea is good. I do that. Even better is to write upcoming events on a whiteboard, then just say look at the board AND the calendar. I also try not to tell him in advance about upcoming events or I will be asked about it all week or weeks...over and over and over. HIQEVER, sometimes I do want to tell him in advance IF the particular event is hinging on hope--meaning it is an appointment that will actually allay his considerable anxiety over something he is afraid will or won't happen.
Hope this helps!
I have now had two years of experience with a 95 year old mother who has very mild dementia. I just don't tell her. She would just drive me crazy prior to any appointment. It took a while to figure it out, but I do not tell her anything in advance.
Good luck!
If I tell him that we have a lunch date with one of the children, in two days, he begins to lay out his shirt and asks if his pants are OK for this date. I also do not inform him until about three hours before the due time of the lunch date..
It must be pretty common for these afflicted folks..I like the calendar idea - will try that!
My Mom works herself into a frenzy hours before she needs to leave the house, I have stopped telling her about upcoming events and appts.. She lives with me so I can let her know that day and make sure I give her sufficient time to get ready.